Back Room Blues: A Tribute to Smut Palace Insanity

by Heather Drain

You’ve seen it; we’ve all seen it. (Well at least those of us enough huevos to admit it.) You’re at the local video store and greeting your line of vision is the back room door, it’s seclusion promising you sights that may tantalize you, turn you on, or even scare the living bejeesuz out of you. What carnal delights await you in the 18+ video room?

Well unless you have time traveling powers or an exceptional video store, you will be greeted with scores of generic faces and bodies being pried open and splattered with semen. Worst of all is that none of these porn clones have the decency to even look like they are into it. At all. It’s like getting psyched up for a blind date with an exotic stranger and being greeted by your old Science teacher naked and with a dingus up his butt. Gross, wrong, and ultimately disappointing.

The Playground of the Mind: An Overview of Shaun Costello's HOT DREAMS

Reviewed By: Heather Drain

Movies have been one of the strongest forms of escapism since the days of the beautiful, ghost like image of famed belly dancer Little Sheba tantalizing/horrifying curious viewers on a Nickelodeon. Art is the safest way to explore facets about your own humanity and all of its murky little corners. With this, it only make sense for numerous directors working in the 70's and 80's to incorporate themes of adult fantasies in film. This concept is front and center in Warren Evans aka Shaun Costello's 1983 film, HOT DREAMS.

Lisa (the great Sharon Mitchell) seemingly has it all. She's beautiful, lives in a nice and roomy loft in New York City and is a successful beefcake photographer. The problem? She's married to a total schmoe, in the form her of her businessman husband, Bob (Michael Bruce). The film opens with the two in bed, all lovingly framed and lit, including some nice, tight composition. Soon, Bob starts rubbing her side, initiating what I like to call “the international sign of your partner waking you to get nookie” maneouver.) She's very receptive but just as things start getting good for Lisa, Bob finishes without making things equal. Even worse, his neglect is excused with him saying he has to get ready for work but then takes, like, 15 minutes to shave his non-facial hair. What?

The Id is a Lonely Hunter: A Review of Shaun Costello's Midnight Desires

 “We hide our desires, even from ourselves.”

The way a person approaches their sexuality can often reveal a lot about their innermost workings, to the extent where that is often more fascinating to explore than the act itself. But how many people can honestly face their sexuality and the mental machina behind it? You are probably wondering where in the hell I'm going with all of this, but never fear, since this psycho-sexual road leads directly to Shaun Costello's mid-70's film, MIDNIGHT DESIRES.

This is My Fist to Your Face Style: The Best of Kung Fu Movies, Volume One (2011)

There are few things in this life that bring me happiness like a good trailer compilation. It's like a Valentine's box of candy, except in lieu of chocolate truffles and sugary goo, you get bite sized samples of cinema! Now, like any box of sweets worth its salt, there has to be some sort of loose, unified thread of commonality. Most do not want peanut brittle mixed with that filled chocolate with the mystery pink center. In the small but growing categories of trailer compilations, Southern DVD, a small company out of South Africa, has released BEST OF KUNG FU MOVIES VOLUME 1. While the kung fu sub genre has been somewhat represented on a number of fine compilations, it has rarely if ever gotten its very own disc. That is, until now. So what's being served on the cinematic buffet tonight?

Sex Kitten with a Whip: Nico B.'s Bettie Page: Dark Angel

The black-bob bangs, kittenish sexuality and near-perfect figure that was Betty Page is an image that has become iconic for multiple generations and alternative groups. Rockabilly retros, hipsters, punkers, S&M enthusiasts and pin-up fans alike all love Betty and really, who couldn't? A delight on screen and print, jubilant no matter how weird or absurd the set up, her story is one that has been shrouded with some degree of mystery. Who was really the girl behind the red lipped smile and black cone bra?

Have You Visited The Blue Cheese Lately?

Sure, it's not for everyone, but sometimes it's fun to look back at the adult fare of yesteryear. Remember the 80s? It was a different time. You spent many minutes fast forwarding past the storyline to get to the good stuff. Oh, and the hair. Lots of hair.

Well, our own Heather Drain likes to look at the stories and go in depth in her reviews. Check out her latest review of Hot Dreams, and look around at the other goodies while you're at it. It's NSFW, so be alert for the boss, and enjoy!

New at The Blue Cheese

Have you been to The Blue Cheese lately?

Some movies just don't fit in here at the Cheese, but we figured that there should be a place to review vintage adult cinema. That's why we created The Blue Cheese. Though it's a little racy and definitely NSFW, we figured that if Roger Ebert could do it, why shouldn't we?

New this week: A Valentine treat you won't forget!

If you're old enough to vote, feel free to head over to The Blue Cheese now.

Rickshaw Sideways: The Amero Brothers Blonde Ambition

by Heather Drain

There are moments in film history where a tag line serves not only as the greatest bait but also as the perfect description. Keep in mind this sort of creative/promotional kismet is about as rare as contraception at the Duggars', but unlike that poor-taste metaphor, it does happen. Vid-X-Pix's latest Platinum Release of BLONDE AMBITION is a fantastic example of this. The tag line in question...

If you liked Singing in the Rain and Deep Throat, then you will love Blonde Ambition!

Funny, yes, but incredibly accurate. Both films actually have the same light-hearted zaniness, but despite Damiano's brilliant theme song (Deeeep Throaaatt....deeper than deep your throat....don't get your goat...that's all she wrote...), DEEP THROAT doesn't really qualify as a proper musical. And unless there is some kind of hidden reel rotting away in some billionaire's attic in Zurich, there is zero sex and nudity in SINGING IN THE RAIN. (Too bad though. Gene Kelley in his prime is a beautiful, beautiful thing y'all.)

“Happiness, too, is inevitable” - A Tribute to Jamie Gillis

By Heather Drain

Let’s face it, folks, the past two years have been horrible for losing great artists, especially for those of us who are into the fringe arts. Damiano, Lux Interior, Bill Landis, Ron Asheton, Brian “Smerdley” Shane, Jack Wrangler, Sky Saxon, Erica Boyer, Juliet Anderson and now Jamie Gillis.

Search Amazon.com for Jamie Gillis

I can’t even convey to you properly how weird it feels to type out that sentence, especially since the news only broke out a few days ago. Death is always a surprise but this was a case of it being genuinely shocking. This was a man that lived life to its fullest and for being 66 years old, he looked damn good. Better than anyone has a right to. But it’s not just appearances. There was something truly bigger than life about the man. Part of that was persona. Any fan of blue films worth his or her salt should be more than familiar with “the dark Prince of Porn. But Gillis was more than that, both as an actor and as a man. This was someone you could never just write off as this or that. When you do that, you’re usually missing the most beautiful and brilliant part of the picture. It is the layers of Gillis’s talent and intelligence that has always fascinated me.

Heather Drain

Heather Drain is a writer and collage artist who is fueled by trash culture, surrealism, weird movies, horror, visual art, rock and roll, punk, industrial, new wave, photography, sleaze and so much more. Film writing is her big love, which has led to her writing for Video Watchdog, Cinema Head Cheese, Cinefear, Cultcuts, Lunchmeat, Screem, Ultra Violent, The Exploitation Journal and the Little Rock Free Press. She resides in the Dragonfly Hacienda with her genius/artist hubby Chuck, their two pet rats and one wonderfully cranky cat, Ziggy.

Read Heather's Columns

Blog: Mondo Heather

Twitter: @crashmarie