Movie Review: Farmer's Daughters (1976) (Impulse Pictures/Synapse Films)

Reviewed by: Rick L. Blalock - October 22, 2015

Starring :                                                           

Gloria Leonard

Susan McBain

Nancy Dare 
Marlene Willoughby

John Black

Spalding Gray

Philip Marlowe

Zebedy Colt

Bill Cort

Synopsis

An innocent afternoon of spying on their parents having sex (and then forcibly sexually assaulting the farm hand) turns even more vile for three daughters when escaped convicts pick their farm to hide from the cops! A horrifying, hardcore afternoon of assault, torture and incest follows as the convicts take advantage of the entire family, culminating in a shocking, perverted game of “Simon Says” and a weirdly mixed and edited final montage. This film is the very definition of “hardcore,” and one of the most eyebrow raising films in the Impulse Pictures library!

(Runtime - 61 minutes)

Will be released on DVD on November 10, 2015 (Impulse Pictures/Synapse Films)

Movie Review: Countess Dracula (1970, Blu-ray / DVD)

What do you get when you mix blood, murder, virgins, and a selfish, manipulative, homicidal crazy who doesn’t want to get older? Elizabeth Nádasdy, aka Countess Bathory. Hammer Films brings us Countess Dracula, a campy little vehicle perfect for the sultry beauty of Ingrid Pitt, our luscious little noble.

Countess Dracula is the story of Elizabeth Bathory and her horrific crimes committed against the young and nubile ladies in her neighborhood. We open with the funeral of the Countess’s husband and how she ogles Imre, the son of her husband’s best friend. I have to admit he is pretty but I’ve always been a sucker for a cleft chin.

At the reading of the Count’s will, Fabio, the castle Historian (who knew there was such a thing?) and Imre are very happy. But Captain Dobi dislikes inheriting the armory and the Countess is pissed she has to share her estate with Ilona, her and the Count’s daughter. Just because you can have kids doesn’t mean you should. What a bitch.

You'll Sweat Blood! "Death Spa" Splatters Blu-ray and DVD This Summer from Dark Sky!

NEWS ON THE OFFICIAL RELAUNCH OF THE GORGON BRAND WILL BE ANNOUNCED EARLY SUMMER 2014!

Movie Review: Knights of Badassdom (2013, Blu-ray)

I’ve never been into Dungeons and Dragons. I was never a gamer; I don’t own any hexagonal dice; I didn’t even read any fantasy novels until I was well into my 20s. But I adore going to the Renaissance Festival every year. Most times I even dress up. I love seeing people immerse themselves in any kind of experience from cosplay to LARPing. So if I enjoyed this flick, I can only imagine how much it speaks to those who take the role-playing/reenacting life more seriously than I ever have.

Knights of Badassdom stars Ryan Kwanten as Joe, a doom metal musician whose super hot girlfriend dumps him because she wants more from life. Joe’s friend and roommate, Eric (Steve Zahn), thinks he needs to get over it by joining him and their good friend, Hung (Peter Dinklage), in a Live Action Role Playing experience over the weekend. Joe reluctantly agrees.

During a LARPing ritual, Eric pulls out an ancient book and picks a random page from which to read. Unfortunately for everyone involved in this weekend’s happenings, the book is an authentic spell manual created by demons that were accidentally summoned by a monk back in the 1600s. Eric calls up a demon succubus that wreaks havoc upon the festival goers. Once they realize it’s not part of the game and that the world is in some serious shit, our band of merry pranksters must accept the terrifying truth and complete a real quest to vanquish the evil.

When I first saw ads and articles about this movie I got very excited. I love the idea of some everyday folks that play at Lord of the Rings are faced with real evil and must use their fake fighting skills to save the day. It didn’t hurt that Ryan Kwanten and Steve Zahn were two of the stars. And for the fellas (and Firefly fans) out there, Summer Glau plays Gwen who can kick some serious ass with her foam swords.