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Showing posts with label sci-fi. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sci-fi. Show all posts

March 9, 2019

Movie Review: "Guardians" (2017; Big Cinema House/Enjoy Movies/Renovatio Entertainment/Shout Factory)


…sigh!! Every year…or perhaps these days, it’s better to say, every few weeks…’it’s the same old story’…

…huh-boy!! Here we go again, folks!! The dust hardly settles from the dynamic, albeit overrated impact of the last great big blow-hard superhero movie, and before you know it, along comes another one…with a heavy sigh, followed by a deftly hand-gestured ‘yank, yank, yank’. Ah, me…alright, good or bad, whether we like it or not, lay it on us. What do we got, this time?? Another dark and brooding hero type, dedicated to a ruthless combat of the criminal types who left him without family?? Even more genetically mutated wonders, endowed with powers to defeat the evils of a world that superficially sees the heroes as mere freaks of nature?? Can there possibly be one more deal with the devil, with the person who made the deal, afforded dark powers to be used in the devil’s servitude, to which that person then reneges on said deal, and instead uses the powers for goodness, rather than badness. Is this world big enough for yet one more super powered alien…the last of his race, sent to this world, in an effort to preserve his heritage, and at the same time, lay roots in a new home, with a new people, which he swears to defend against fiendish perpetrators of evil and crime, both earthly and other-worldly??

…yeah, sing it again, and again, and again, Bonnie…”…isn’t there a white knight, upon a fiery steed??”…huh-boy…sigh, with a bowed head shake and eyeball roll (…nope!! Not suffering from superhero movie fatigue here, folks…nope, not at all…sigh…)…

…ah yes, the stories are varied…the characters, countless…the attitudes, like someone with bipolar affliction, ever- changing on a dime. Of course, there’s also the assumed set and/or adjusted expectations of the masses, especially from the viewpoint of those geek-savvy with the popular arts, who might be familiar with it all, via the hallowed pages of those four-colored, multi-paneled comic rags. Really, at some point, one cannot help but feel that all these stories, characters and situations invariably blend into each other, to the point where we, the paying audience, pretty much rolls our eyes, let out a sigh, take in the next superhero movie…driven with an almost commercially manufactured ‘do whatever the crowd does’ anticipation…then, just short of tossing that movie aside, followed by the sigh-instilling after-thought of ‘harrumph…OK, next?’, here comes another generic, assembly-line, cookie cutter episode of super powered daring do, with about damn near the same goals, intermingled with the same conflicts and the same personal problems…

…really, it’s totally understandable, when…after so many of these ‘same-old, same-old’ superhero movies gone by, and still to come…well, we just can’t help but jump the fence, and start rooting for the villains, rather than the heroes. Hey...no secret that the bad guys are insurmountably much more interesting, alluring and fun, than the good guys anyways, right??...

…and yet, despite all this yah-dah-dah, yah-dah-dah, wah-fucking-wahhing, what do we do?? Why, we just saunter our butts right back up to that thar’ ticket booth, and once again fork over our hard-earned simolians, for yet another jaw-dropping, eye-poping, head-droning, rock ‘em/sock ‘em, CGI-oversaturated super-powered epic. It’s kinda like that old George Carlin ‘ice cream’ gag…you know, you eat the ice cream, you get that painful brain freeze, you rub away that excruciatingly cold spot in your throat, and afterwards, what do you do?? Eat more ice cream!! Gotta quote ol’ George in saying, “…what, are we fucking stupid??”…

…truth be known…yeah, yeah sure…admittedly, amidst the polished and clean-cut assembly-line standard and stereotype, as far as the seemingly never-ending superhero movie genre…every few films or so, our fine tinsel-town filmmakers, writers and directors do manage to invoke an unconventional twist, a skewed change in tone, a rebellious attitude, a more jovially flavoring, which genuinely manages to breathe at least some measure of fresh new life into the stale, by-the-numbers proceedings. A generous whiff of ‘hey, what if’ into the mix-master…maybe something a bit original to liven things up, perhaps beyond that of what might have already been done or written. Something like…well, like
…come, as we shift the locale, and the time circuits to…oh say, Russia…during the Cold War, some 40 odd years previous…when, under the cloak of absolute government secrecy, two renowned scientists devise a lucrative and ambitious project, code named ‘Patriot’…the sole purpose of which is directed towards experimental human genetic manipulation, in an effort towards creating super-powered soldiers. Well, now…it seems that one of the scientists…Professor Kuratov…having something more than a difference of opinion with his scientist partner, as far as the speed and direction of the project’s science and application, goes rogue, steals the project’s research data, and begins initiating his own experiments on chosen ‘volunteers’; the military, hard and fast on the hunt for Kuratov, catches up with him…though the professor’s capture is thwarted when he blows up his own laboratories, and presumably himself, in the process…
…four decades later, Kuratov inexplicably returns; however, he has since become quite scarred and mentally screwed, assuming crazed delusions of grandeur, and having harnessed a cache of artificially endowed psychic powers over all electronics and mechanical devices. Stealing military weaponry and prototypes, Kuratov instigates a path of destruction, with the ultimate intent upon assuming worldwide control over all man-made mechanics and technology…
…with a good measure of caution and reluctance, the Russian military re-initiates the ages-old ‘Patriot’ program, and launches a countrywide search for any of the numerous, now-super-powered, and hopefully still living human ‘guinea pigs’, who were invariably discarded and scattered across the continent, soon after Kuratov explosively eighty-sixed his work…all now rumored to be living out their lives in conflicting, bittersweet peace and secrecy. The covert military search manages to find four of them: Ursus (Anton Pampushnyy), a young and rugged-looking scientist, living in isolation deep in the sheltering Siberian forests, and possessing the ability to willfully transform himself partially or completely into a hulking and powerful beast of a bear. Khan (Sanjar Madi), discovered in white sand desert wastelands…there, applying his martial arts skills as a darkly clad mercenary…is armed with large, crescent-shaped, scythe-like swords, and has the ability to move at lightning speed. A weathered and elderly, monk-like farmer named Ler (Sebastien Sisak), has staked claim in the war-scarred battlements of a castle’s ruins…his power, the ability to move and manipulate the very earth and surrounding rock formations, beneath his feet. And found applying her unique abilities of underwater invisibility to the awed delight of an appreciative audience…applauding witnesses to a lavishly staged magic show, Xenia (Alina Lanina) completes the sought team of reluctant super-powered dissidents…
…bitter, reluctant and bewildered, considering a tortured past which they’d rather forget, or have outright forgotten altogether…the genetically altered foursome, despite inner conflict and reservations, find a common purpose with which to bond with…the capture and persecution of the one that created them…an old adversary who is as powerfully altered as they are. But will their combined might, as difficult as that proves to be to assemble, be enough to see them through the impending battle…a battle, which although their first, might well be their last??...
…now, right out the gate…the most intriguing ‘cะปoh’ (…read: 'elephant') in the room, is the front & center fact that…hey, we’re like, talking Russian superheroes here, folks. OK, yeah…we’ve sorta been here before, given that, despite a certain beloved, Slavic-accented, metal-skinned member of the X-Men…not to mention, the imaginatively alternative reality ‘what if’ published exploits of a certain legendary interstellar ‘man of steel’, told from the perspective of having landed, as an infant, in a Ukrainian Farm commune, vice a vast, albeit random Kansas grain field, the idea of super-powered heroes, originating from Russia…yeah, this sort of thing nonetheless remains a rather unique and novel one. And as far as the fictional superhero realm, as a whole, the mere suggestion ideally mirrors a juxapositioned measure of creative literary arrogance, that presumptuously dictates…for the most part…that the crust of the superhero populous would exclusively and stereotypically originate from these 'might makes right', wholesome ‘apple pie and stars ‘n’ stripes’ domestic shores…
…indeed, in retrospect of having seen “Guardians”, and genuinely walking away with a respectable amount of appreciation for the notably flawed, though moderately engaging drama, dynamic action and rousing adventure, featuring a new, albeit clearly inspired rag-tag band of cross-continental, super-powered rogues…yes, inspired, but a wholly original-enough written crew, as opposed to the already set-forth ‘comic page panel to silver screen’ translations from the renowned minds, over at Marvel and DC…this reviewer is of the subsequent opinion that…yeah, there might well be room enough for this special brand of ultra-powered misfit daring doers, in the hallowed and honored annuls of the superhero film genre…
…and a rather unconventional, albeit relatable and tragic crew of regionally diversified misfits, this motley bunch most assured are. Ursus, the burly and seclusive were-bear scientist…later armed with a gargantuan-sized, psychically directional version of the ol’ Painless Gatling gun, from ‘Predator’…harbors inner torture, conflict and insecurity, in the sense that every time a desperate situation necessarily calls for him to initiate his monstrous and beastly transformation, he fears losing control one day, in finding the inability to become human again. The weathered and burnt-out loner Ler, who’s powers are supplemented by the military, enabling him to string and weld conjoined pieces of rock into an electro-plasma-charged whip, is the most defiant of the quartet, as far his reluctantly gifted abilities…preferring to remain in solitude, but nonetheless finds vengeful purpose in being recruited into the team. Xenia invariably, though later willingly joins up in an effort to shed light upon her past…a clouded past, which she has absolutely no memory of; she is later provided with a specialized suit that enables her to control her invisibility at will, as well as being able to focus those powers on anything she touches. And then, there’s the zen-spirited, ninja-like Khan…for the impending battle, retrofitted with an impenetrable armor…though preferring to further his solo fervor as a hired soldier-of-fortune, nonetheless brings his extraordinary talents to the table, if only to do what is right, in thwarting a world threatening megalomaniac, welding a formidably disastrous and destructive power…
…for the most part, the able-bodied cast is adequate to the varied and diversified characters they portray; however, much like the film’s reluctant superhero components needing to cooperate with each other…work with each other, to exude that classic ‘sum of the whole is far greater than the individual parts’ ideology, “Guardians” shines best when this misfit ensemble share their screen time, as opposed to individual focus. In fact, the more notably singular standout characters, though affecting, are not even directly associated with the team itself. Actress Valeriya Shkirando proves a more dynamic presence on the screen, than even our hapless superhero entities…channeling an alluring and feminine ‘Nick Fury’ like presence in the proceedings, in playing the military’s Major Larina. And as an equally dynamic adversary type, Stanislav Shirin deliciously plays up the over-the-top, ‘crazy but not stupid’ card, as the super-mega-charged megalomaniac Kuratov…so much so, in fact, one might genuinely believe this totally formidable, mad and insane character could potentially give any number of the Marvel or DC goodie-goodies, a run for their money. Crossover, anyone??...
……to the film’s credit…eh, definitely better than some, but falling short of greatness…the overall production values and visual dynamics seem to fall with the range of…oh say, just short of your basic big-bucks Marvel ensemble entry, and one of the more ambitiously reaching fantasy films, culled from the budget-driven knock-off/mockbuster folks, over at The Asylum. Yet surprisingly enough, and going into “Guardians” with an open mind, the imperfections…as far as the level of, the unpolished quality of, and the interchanging chemistry between the CGI, optical and practical special effects…are pretty much acceptable, forgivable, and really not all that distracting (…as opposed to the demanding expectations, versus the resulting imperfect visuals of Marvel’s recent ‘Captain Marvel’ domestic release…though fleeting, but very distracting…but that’s a whole other story). Also to the film’s credit…the outstanding, though economic set designs, the nice integration of outer locales with the special effects (…the city-rampaging ‘bug robots’ were pretty cool, reminding me of a more up-scaled and ‘lifelike’ version of the ‘animated’ grid bugs, in 1982’s “Tron”), and the slick, varied & extraordinarily detailed prop and costume work…overall and clearly, a matter of resourcefully making so little, look like a helluva lot…a higher level of the ‘silk purse, out of a sow’s ear’ type of economic production, so to speak…
…storywise, the approach to this material has it wearing a distinctly dark and stone-cold cloak of air, with sort of forced moments of levity, and a mostly haunting soundtrack (…the ‘Guardians’ theme, is particularly and memorably mesmerizing), which anyone on these shores might stereotypically expect, considering this is a Russian production; however, that’s also what makes these dynamic proceedings surprising…that Russian filmmakers herein, vied for the stereotype, or what might have been expected, versus something wholly unconventional and unexpected (…this, among other reasons, might possibly explain why the film was unanimously lambasted by Russian and European audiences, upon initial theatrical release). Oh, without a doubt, the basic superhero crust is there…with clearly notable and inspired nods towards the Avengers (…and the team’s singular components), the X-Men, and Guardians of the Galaxy…but the core of the premise itself…from the characters, to the story components and set-up… seems not unlike that of classic paper dolls, with their interchangeable variety of ‘fold-the-tab-over’ clothing, and the clearly mad clothier was left to the whims of his wild imagination, in doing the clothing…adding layer upon layer…until you have something totally absurd and outrageous, yet still oddly appealing…
…short and sweet (…as usual with me, far too late for that), for a superhero film best watched in the original Russian language, with subtitles (...the domestic dubbing is a little on the silly side), “Guardians” is not a particularly great entry into the mass super-powered hero relay…but it is a respectably good and worthwhile one...original, in an inspired way (...i.e., not based upon any direct literary source, but taking it's cues from other, higher-profile sources), which cries out in curiosity, towards being further explored (…a reportedly financial flop in Russia, the lead production company went bankrupt…though, a proposed sequel , co-produced and co-financed with filmmakers in China, has not been ruled out; take my money now, guys...I'm in); in culinary terms, the film is like half-baked chocolate chip cookie dough, in that it’s not quite all the way done yet, but it’s still pretty damn tasty and eatable. Can you imagine what they'd have, and we’d subsequently have, if they’d just let that puppy cook to it’s full potential??

...uh, should the folks over at Marvel and DC be concerned, or worried??



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January 9, 2018

Cinema Head Cheese: Podshort! - Glitch: Season 2 (Netflix, 2017)

The second season of the Australian sci-fi series answers mamny questions while creating many more.

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April 20, 2017

Cover Art for the Upcoming Release of Brian Skiba's Sci-Fi Cult Flick "Crushed Velvet"



Coming Soon! Directed by Brian Skiba (Blood Moon Rising, Rottentail) and Starring Laurie Love, Ron Jeremy, Dominic Ross, David Hayes, Kevin Tye and Jeff Dolniak.


December 6, 2015

Movie Review: The Brain That Wouldn't Die (1962)

by Hal Astell

Director: Joseph Green

Stars: Herb Evers, Virginia Leith and Leslie Daniels

Buy The Brain That Wouldn't Die on Blu-ray from Scream Factory

'Let me die!' a woman's voice repeatedly pleads before the title credits begin, in fact before we see anything. It's a disembodied voice out of nowhere that suggests a female version of Johnny Got His Gun, or at least that begins where that book and film ends. It's all very promising but sadly it's all downhill from there, which possibly explains why this was completed in 1959 under the title The Black Door but wasn't released until 1962 under its current more lurid title. It isn't without merit, as it does contain a number of memorable cult moments, not least one of the most abiding images of all sixties genre cinema, but it still can't live up to the title. It comes from the common mad scientist subgenre of horror/science fiction movies of the time but unlike their progenitor Frankenstein which remains as timeless as ever, this has already been superceded as the unholy transplantation of limbs and organs that it rages against is routinely beneficial today.



It's fascinating to watch these movies and see public opinion, as distilled through scriptwriters trying to please the largest audience possible, change over the decades. This film is only half a century old, but it already seems quaint and dated to those of us who have benefited from or know people who have benefited from the very transplant techniques that are derided by the characters as immoral, unethical and insane. Much of the problem is that the overtly schlocky characteristics of a mad scientist are so much easier to write than his more sophisticated drives, especially if you ignore the idea that science is constantly moving forward; and naturally scriptwriters of schlocky low budget genre movies from the fifties and sixties really couldn't give a transplanted rat's ass for anything sophisticated. They could happily start at 'Burn the witch!' and work backwards from there to generate a salacious heap of scientific gobbledygook.

November 7, 2015

Movie Review: Primer (2004)

Aaron(Shane Carruth) and Abe(David Sullivan) have an invention.  They don't know what it is or what it does, but they know they have something.  They find out they have a time machine that makes it possible to go back a short time in the past.  The two have issues with how to use the time that they now have.

Primer is the type of movie that puts your brain into think mode.  I'm actually going to watch it again just so that I can help myself piece together the amount of times the two friends use the time machine.

The camera shots are really weird in this movie.  The opening scene is a shot from the ceiling angled down with a light in in the upper portion of the screen and the garage door in the background.  The next scene in the kitchen/dining area has the camera on the counter top, with the edge of the counter top showing.  There were other shots that just had too much showing of people's backs or other objects in the foreground that weren't vital for the scene.  By no means, am I an expert as far as directing goes, but there were so many scenes that were visually bothersome and it took away from the movie-watching experience.

November 6, 2015

Movie Review: The Zero Theorem (2013)

Qohen Leth(Christoph Waltz) is a talented computer operator in a futuristic world.  Qohen lives a very isolated life and it's due to his faith that he will be receiving a phone call.  He doesn't know when, so he has centered his life around working and waiting for the phone call.

Qohen is put on a project by Management(Matt Damon) to prove the Zero Theorem.  Proof that at if the universe ends, there truly is nothing.  The film explores the faith of people and what drives them.  It is explored wonderfully as you see Qohen giving up on experiences that would make him a happier person, but he needs to know what that phone call is.

The visuals in director Terry Gilliam's film help push the faith drive.  Qohen lives in an abandoned church with eyes on him at all time, much how people feel with religion.  The biggest visual metaphor would be the giant crucifix with Jesus' head removed and replaced with a camera.

The pace of the movie wasn't the fastest but overall I didn't get bored watching, especially with Christoph Waltz in the lead role.  Watching him deal with love, friendship, trying new foods and the like felt very organic.  Melanie Thierry as Bainsley was a delight to watch as well as her relationship with Qohen was played out incredibly well.  Lucas Hedges as Bob started off as someone I really did not like, but he turned out to be the most reasonable voice of the film.

August 18, 2015

Movie Review: 1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982; Deaf Internacional Film/Blue Underground)

...funny thing, about the passing of time; it has a way of affecting, re-affecting and de-affecting certain things. 'Certain things', as far as how the general masses see them. How one looks at a certain thing, one day, and then years later, see that very same thing in a different light. The old story of how time is kind to some things, and not so forgiving on others...the old adage of some things aging like fine wine, and for other things...well, they turn to vinegar. And so, considering the particular subject matter at hand, as the classic pop song lyric so succinctly goes, "...if you think you know where all this is heading..."...yeah, we're talking Italian trash cinema, with the moniker of 'trash' not only being poignantly applicable to this specific film review, but also, as an endearing token of affection, with regards to this rather eclectic brand of cinema...

...in as much as this reviewer has very much embraced and appreciated Italian cult film cinema, regardless of all of it's ever-shifting, ever-changing, even ever-mimicking incarnations, stemming back to the early '60's, and reaching up through the years, to...say, about the late '80's. The gothic-flavored horrors of the '60's...the tense, visceral giallos of the '70's...the gore-soaked zombie & cannibal buffets of the '80's. And all of the war-sploitation, shark-sploitation, prison-sploitation, Rambo-sploitation, Star Wars-sploitation and post-apocalyptic future-sploitation flicks, prolifically sprinkled amidst it all. And it's one of those latter categories, and a specific film therein, that we're gleefully jumping all over, in this focus...

July 6, 2015

Movie Review: Kiss Me Deadly (1955; MGM/UA/Criterion)

...OK, people!! Let's get it right out there, and state the obvious...or rather, what will be the obvious, depending upon whoever has or hasn't seen this subtle and captivating potboiler...this invariably explosive powerhouse of a film, or at the very least, are aware of it's influence on a certain film director, amongst others. Ahem!! (...insert a clearing of the throat, and a rolling of the eyes) Yes, people...this is, without a doubt, one of many poignant and noteworthy films, which influenced eclectic cult film director Quentin Tarantino. Just how this film proves juxtapositioned as being influential...well, we'll get to that, as we move along here...

...now, how this curiously unseen film came to this unwary viewer's attention...as well as having since given cause for this dunderhead of a claimed seasoned and knowledgeable film fan to (...once again) kick himself in the buttocks, repeatedly, for having missed this one (...amongst others), all these years...well, those familiar with the nostalgic, over-the-airwaves digital broadcast channel, Antenna TV, may well be aware that in the quiet, star-studded wee hours of the morning, on Saturday and Sunday, this channel...a sort of TV Land wannabee, which during the waking hours, broadcasts the best of TV sitcoms and drama, from the '50's through the '80's...instead reels out the best of selected titles from the MGM and Columbia Pictures film archives, and...uh, hey Mr. Peabody!! Set the wayback machine to some weeks ago, when this viewer rose from the covers, knuckled the sleep from his eyes, switched on the tube, and caught a rather strikingly familiar sight...which culminated with a most explosively cataclysmic, 'what-the-f***' film ending. Or better yet, let's just throw in a little more fantasy, pressed an imagined 'rewind' button, and kicked things into gear, right from the beginning, 'kay??.....

September 14, 2014

Movie Review: Tarzan (2013; Constantin Film/Lionsgate)

...yep, these days, the legendary Lord of the Apes...well, he ain't gettin' no love, film-wise. No siree, bob...in this day and age of super-powered, gadget-toting iron men, bat men and spider men, and/or other-worldly super men, ol' muscle-bound, grunting, vine-swinging Tarzan, for the most part, seems to be getting the ol' shaft-o-roonie. Eh, understandable, one might suppose, considering today's superhero-worshipping audience might well take one look at a celluloid-rendered version of Edgar Rice Burrough's classic literary character, shrug their shoulders, and think, '...eh, no powers?? Just muscle, animal 'magnetism' and the typical sense of right, wrong & justice...besides all that, who and what the heck is he, and what can he actually do, compared to...say, the likes of Wolverine, or The Hulk??" In fact, getting less respect, these days, than even the often heckled Aquaman...and heck, we don't even need to go there, right??...

...and to think, at one time, Tarzan was much more respectfully revered, as a savage 'hero amongst heroes'...at least, cinematically (...all due credit to athletically-vigorous Johnny Weismuller, or even via early TV broadcast (...oh, that muscle-bound Ron Ely). So what gives, as far as contemporary depiction of the once-iconic character, who pretty much hasn't seen proper representation, since...uh, can you say 'Christopher Highlander Lambert', in the heavily dramatic 1984 compeller, "Greystoke, the Legend of Tarzan, Lord of the Apes"?? Who knows?? But in the advent of Disney, having let their rights to the character expire, and recently, those rights having been deftly picked up by a German computer animation production company...well, let's just say that our intrepid, vine-swinging Lord of the Apes, isn't exactly faring particularly well, of late, and has definitely seen better days...

August 13, 2014

Movie Review: I, Frankenstein (2013; Lakeshore Entertainment/Liongate)

...a hypothetical question, if I may: Given the countless examination and variations on authoress Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley's immortal horror classic...the films, the books, even that imaginatively scribed by the feeble, albeit able-minded hand of Shelley, herself...what message, overall, was the original 1818 novel, called "Frankenstein, or The Modern Prometheus" trying to explore and expound upon?? That there were certain things that man was not meant to know?? That absolute tragedy, turmoil and nightmarish horrors await, whoever dares to emulate the power of God?? That science and technology must evolve, even in the face of the status quo's fear of the unknown & unexplored, and that there will always be the daring and unconventional one, who is bravely, sometimes recklessly willing to take that step into the unknown, no matter what it takes, no matter what the stakes, as well as the results are...and no matter what consequences, nay even what punishment awaits, as the result??...

...of course, you've heard the story before: Dedicated and obsessed scientist, going against the grain of his teachings...and yet, taking those very same teachings, far and beyond what his educators might have imagined...or would not dare to blasphemously consider...aspires to create a being, from the assembled parts of the dead, using nature's own dark forces, chemically and that wrought from the electrically charged heavens. At first, elatedly relishing his success at reanimating the pieces/parts corpse, Victor Frankenstein is quickly repulsed and disgusted at the unbearable ugliness of his soulless creation, and as such, rejects the misshapen creature, and attempts to destroy it. Driven into a forsaken life of wandering solitude, as the result of his ugliness, as well as the rejection by his 'father'...the creature, whose mental and vocal capacities develop quite rapidly, trudges through a solitary life, learning of what it means to be human...learning of how he came to be...feared by all whom he encounters...and very much desiring the luxury of companionship...someone like himself, who will not reject him. Returning to Frankenstein's home, the creature murderously coerces the doctor to repeat his experiment, in an effort to create a female companion for him; when the experiment fails, and the newly born female creature indeed shrieks at the very sight of her inhuman predecessor, the monster is once again forced into isolation, filled with rage. However, Victor Frankenstein...now in the throes of personal tragedy and emotional turmoil, as the result of the creatures' murderous effect on his life...relentlessly pursues his creation, with the intent of destroying him, once and for all...

July 18, 2014

Movie Review: Under the Skin (2014, Blu-ray / DVD)

Reviewed by: Jimmy D.

In Hollywood, when any actor/actress goes outside of their comfort zone two things usually happen: 1. They create art and win Oscars. 2. They run back to their comfort zone when they flop. I respect Scarlett Johansson as an actress who likes to take chances, but I feel this film she was trying a little too hard. Ghost World was that quirky film that put her on the map, almost by accident. After all it was a Thora Birch vehicle after she got people talking in American Beauty. Scarlett was just that also-ran in Home Alone 3, who somehow got people talking and put her in the A-list. That being said, if this was the film that was supposed to put her on the map, I feel Thora would now be the star.

May 1, 2014

Movie Review: "Dead Shadows" (2012; DC Medias/Section 5/Shout Factory)

...for this ardent viewer of cult and genre films...well, sometimes it almost seems that he's seen it all. Heck, are there really any more original ideas, out there?? It's gotten to the point where this devoted auteur of oddball cinema can spot a concept film, coming from miles away. It's no wonder, one cannot help but think that all of the great core concepts have been used up, and all that there's left, is a melding of concepts....'this', crossed with 'that', with a smidgen of 'this, over here'. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I truly wish that I was a fly on the wall, in one of those darkened studio executive board rooms, watching some young and enthusiastic writer, wildly acting out a concept, in front of a gaggle of stiff-suited, stogie-puffing, poker-faced executives...trying to convince them to invest their interest and monetary resources, in what the writers believe is a great idea for a movie (...and to be quite honest, being an aspiring writer myself, I would genuinely want to be on the writer's end of this scenario, as for the most part, they're on the deckplate level, like all of us, and as such, they seem to have a finger on the pulse of what audiences would want to see; most studio execs, given their opportunity to put in their two cents worth, idea-wise, seem driven foremost by money, and as such, think that they know what movie watchers want...coupled with what they believe will bring in the big bank...and for the most part, time and time again, both motivations fail to mesh as irreadily as their mis-matched concepts, and in the end, more than often, they tend to be wrong)...

April 29, 2014

Movie Review: Empire of the Apes (2013)

Sick of all those well acted ape movies? Tired of seeing top of the line CGI? Fed up with fresh stories and writing? Then do I have the movie for you!

Empire of the Apes is basically THE biggest rip off of Planet of the Apes I’ve ever seen. Oh, excuse me. Homage. That’s code for “I couldn’t think of anything original so I just rewrote something I thought was bitchin”. What the fuck ever, dude.

The story, which is told in a flashback by a man about to be executed, is this. Space ship is transporting a cargo of female prisoners (read: three) to a distant plant where they have been sold to a species that only uses females for pleasure (is there any other use for them, besides making sandwiches?). But the women say, ‘oh, hell no’ and make their escape. Unfortunately, the short range pod they’ve stolen crashes on a nearby planet that is home to a species of talking apes. And by species I mean there are six of them.

The apes decide that the women will make great breeding stock to repopulate their species. Wait, what? But in order to determine which ape gets to breed with which girl, the ape leader, Korg, must bring back The Great Ape Games, i.e. really really bad fake WWE smack-downs. They will fight to determine who gets first pick.

And once they'd figured out the women were from off-planet, the apes must find a way to escape this world with them. Apparently, they’re stuck on this rock for reasons unknown (and who really cares) so when Zantor, the prisoner transport captain, tracks down the escapees, he and Korg strike a mutually beneficial deal. Unfortunately, they both plan to double cross each other.

April 28, 2014

Movie Review: "Jodorowsky's Dune" (2014; Sony Pictures Classics)

...say you have a standard; a set standard, once innovative and unique. A standard, which initially might have instilled a sense of 'wow', amongst the masses, and now, is wholly accepted as 'the norm'...maybe even to the point of yawn-inducing. Then, as the cliched phrase goes, "...just when you've thought that you've seen everything under the sun, along comes..."; an artist, known and reputed for outrageousness...an embraceable outrageousness, with a respectable following, mind you, but clearly, a level of imaginative 'over-the-top' craziness, with an underlining hint of wisdom...'thinking outside the box', as yet another cliched saying goes. And so, that artist takes that now.monotone standard, filters it through a different set of eyes, and suggests quite literally turning that standard on it's head...breathing new life into it, and yet, retaining the crust of what the standard stood for and meant...

...for this viewer, I love 'what if' scenarios. I became amoured with the 'what if' concept, at an early age, when the artistic and creative 'power-that-be', scribbling away at Marvel Comics, ingeniously came up with a unique and absolutely 'off-the-wall' comic book series, which took many of the super-powered hero standards...at a minimum, tweaked their histories...their mythos, here and there, and at most, quite literally shook the contents of the standard into a frenzied mish-mash...stood back, and gandered at what the outcome would be, storywise and direction, given the changes. As the result, some unique, creative...even bizarre and surreal ideas came to pass, and Marvel's "What If...??" series proved a phenomenal favorite, back in it's day...

April 1, 2014

Movie Review: Attack of the Crab Monsters (1957)

There’s an STD joke in here somewhere…

I’ve always enjoyed the Edgar Allan Poe movies of the 1960s directed by Roger Corman. But I realized I haven’t seen more than a small fraction of RC’s work, particularly the sci-fi monster movies from the 50s (with the exception being The Wasp Woman - that shit was awesome!).

And so I’ve rectified my terrible short comings by taking a gander at Attack of the Crab Monsters. The opening credits alone scream cheese ball as they’re hand drawn and look how Ariel’s world would have ended up if Ursula had succeeded in defeating King Triton.

There is a lot of talking in this flick because I can only guess the available money went to pay for the actors and that’s about it. So not as many action shots as there are looooong minutes of explanation as to why the people are on this particular island, and one character actually tells us (via random naval crew guy #2) the names and occupations of every fucking person.

Basically a crew of scientists and Navy guys need to search a little spit of an island for a research crew that disappeared from there earlier. And wouldn’t you know it but people start dying two minutes in: random crew guy #4 falls out of the dinghy and is pulled back up without his head. That’s less than optimal.

January 22, 2014

Movie Review: "The Beast of Hollow Mountain/The Neanderthal Man" (1956/53; Shout/Scream Factory)

...what was it, that old saying, about imitation being the sincerest form of flattery?? Point in case, the little guy...filmmaker-wise...who is inspired to 'knock off' something put out by the big-leaguers. We've seen and heard this one before, time and time again...and we've resigningly come to accept the fact that, for good or bad...for every 'Alien', there's a 'Galaxy of Terror', an 'Xtro' and an 'Inseminoid', just to give one of the more obvious examples. However, every once in a blue moon, just the opposite happens...'opposite', in the sense that a fairly good, albeit forgettable and negligible genre idea is put out there, for all the masses to see...an 'underdog' production contender, so to speak...only to have greater life breathed into such ideas, by big-studio efforts...upheld to the point where they stand out more prominently, historically, than the underlings with the original concept...in effect, making those who were there, first, almost forgotten. Alas, and yet in a way, thankfully, such is the latter case, with regards to a duo of lower-tiered classic 'B', creature-feature-style, sci-fi/horror flicks, recently showcased together, on one of Shout/Scream Factory's two-fer combo packs...

December 5, 2013

Movie Review: Danguard Ace: The Movie Collection (1977, Toei Animation/Shout Factory)

...most genre aficionados have a fairly good idea of when they were first privy of the category of animation, coined as 'anime'; for some...much like this ardent viewer...it was a uniquely visual oddity, which one grew up with...at some point, forsaken for a stretch...and then, picked up later, when the artistry of this particular venue of animated storytelling, had evolved, considerably. Oh yes, thinking back upon the early days of embraced amine...that is, before such productions were called 'anime', and were merely known as 'cartoons'...how uniquely individual, were these engrossing and embraceable animated imports, as compared to countless American youths' regular domestic diet of animation, from cartoon 'factories', such as Warner Brothers, Filmation, Tex Avery and Hanna-Barbara. Amongst the best...Speed Racer. Gigantor. Astro-Boy. Kimba, the White Lion. Personal would-be 'anime' favorites, shuffled in amongst domestic classics...the simple and jerky rendered animation of such, translated and dubbed for domestic consumption...and betraying what made these imported 'toons so darned compelling: the ability to present likable, relatable and embraceable characters, engaging in fantastic, albeit complex and emotionally-driven stories. For this viewer, as mentioned previous, one...well, as the old saying goes, "...one has to grow up, sometime" (...uh, bite your tongue, you stiff-shirted 'inner mature' voice of reason, dammit), and as such, there came a time, as a youth, to move onto other things...in this viewer's case, it meant taking a sabbatical from dedicated animation viewing...those Saturday morning and after-school respites, and...well, OK, I admit it...this viewer did occasionally take a peek through the crack of an unclosed door, to see where the world of anime was taking ardent viewers, both domestically and internationally...


October 14, 2013

Movie Review: Antiviral (2012, Alliance/IFC Films)

...uh, ladies and gentlemen...if you please, let me ask you something. Just how far would you go...in whatever way, shape or form...to embrace your favorite celebrity?? Would you merely follow their media exploits, published in tabloids, or broadcast on the exploitative TMZ?? Would you instead wait hours in line, just for a celebrity's autograph?? (...ahem, with hand raised...been there, done that) Would you pull them aside, upon chance or planned encounter, and snap a quick and spontaneous, albeit annoying (...to them) paparazzi shot?? Would you dare sneak into the celebrity's house, just to sleep in their bed...drink their orange juice, in the 'fridge...use their toilet?? Would you go so far as to spend your life's savings on a complex surgery, which would make your nose look like your favorite celebrity's nose?? Doctors have coined a genuine name for such blatant obsession...call it 'celebrity worship syndrome', or as definition serves, 'an obsessive-addictive disorder in which a person becomes overly involved with the details of a celebrity's personal life'...and admit it or not, just about everyone engages this syndrome, whether it be to the smallest degree (...i.e., 'I really like that person's music; it's a favorite of mine, and I listen to it, whenever I can'), or to a level much more grandiose and disturbing (...i.e., '...uh, like, I've had this plastic surgery, see...to alter my entire body to look like my favorite celebrity, as well as legally having had my name changed to match his/hers, and because of this, I, um...I have had a legal injunction issue against me, forbidding me to come within 100 yards of him/her')...

September 25, 2013

Movie Review: The Day The Earth Stood Still (1951, Twentieth Century Fox)

The Day The Earth Stood Still (Twentieth Century Fox, 1951)
Directed by Robert Wise
Starring Michael Rennie, Patricia Neal and Hugh Marlowe
Run Time- 92 minunes
Rated-G

The term "Classic" gets thrown around quite a bit in the coarse of conversation, in regards to movies and film. And as any fan of film knows, the term is quite subjective. In the realm of the science fiction/alien invasion genre for instance, movies like The Thing From Another World, War of the Worlds and Invaders From Mars are almost always the first to be mentioned in this regard, and rightfully so. They are all magnificent examples of the "Cold War Era Mentality" that sci-fi film makers of the 50's were so heavily influenced by. All aliens from space were evil, they lusted for our resources, craved our blood or wanted to take over the bodies of our parents. They were to be destroyed at all cost, usually by a clever combination of military might and scientific know-how. That's just how we rolled back in the 50's. The first film to buck this trend (ironically, even before there was a trend), was Twentieth Century Fox's- The Day The Earth Stood Still.
An unknown object is discovered to be orbiting the Earth at 4000 miles per hour. Nations from around the globe are tracking it and radio stations reporting on its every movement. A quiet unease quickly turns to fear and panic as the object, a large flying disc, eventually makes its landing in a park in Washington D.C.

July 20, 2013

TV on DVD Review: Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, Season Three (1995/96)


...having been wrought from a generation, which at a younger age, went salivatingly ga-ga over Godzilla & Gamera movies, Ultra Man & Johnny Sokko episodes, Infra-Man and Gigantor, this viewer often found it so easy to diss the occasional, wayward, stumbled upon, broadcast episode of this 'what-the-heck-is-it' TV oddity, called 'Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers'; after all, in the onset, the whole franchise seemed nothing more than an adolescent-geared hybrid knock-off of ideas and concepts previously explored...albeit in a somewhat more hallucinogenic meld (...jovially, I recall an episode of VH1's "I Love the '90's", where Dee Snider, of Twisted Sister, spoke of how his own kids 'got caught up in this mind**** of a show'). Given a viewing of sporadic episodes, here and there, this viewer vaguely caught onto the ideas, interlaced into the show's super-hero-istic forefront, whereby each episode would invoke a simple-to-understand level of drama amongst the dynamic martial arts monster fighting...sometimes even exuding poignant concepts on human values and social behavior...once again, emulating the old 'let's trick kids into learning' diversion...something which, despite being as equally deceptive, was much more apparent and obvious, back in the '70's, with the 'Schoolhouse Rock' thing, and instructively preached, epilogued portions of Saturday morning kids shows. And so, when afforded the opportunity to examine the crust of a whole season of the "...Rangers", this viewer's first reaction was...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! The Agony!!! The Horror!!! The Torture!!!...