Movie Review: Prince of the City (2012)

What the hell happened to Michael Madsen? How is it his talent has ended up here, fallen into the gutter and soaking in the slimy run-off of shitty movies? What happened to Mr. Blond, dammit? That’s not to say he’s not working. Look at his resume at IMDB. He’s a got a shit ton of films under his belt. I’m just saying quantity does not equal quality.

In Prince of the City, we meet Prince (yes, that’s his real name but no, he ain’t no bad-ass musician), the adopted son of a corporate mogul (you’ll have to forgive me because most of the characters in the film are Malaysian and I couldn’t pronounce let alone remember their names so I might mix them up). Dad wants to make Prince the new CEO, much to the chagrin of his birth son, Putra. That’s okay, though. Putra has plans of his own. When his father won’t reconsider appointing him as CEO, Putra shoots him. He then hires an assassin to murder Prince’s girlfriend, Adele (the other mayonnaise face in this flick besides Madsen), and sets Prince up as the main suspect in her death and their dad’s.

Movie Review: The Vineyard (1989, New World/Arrow)

...as might be the same to some of you fine genre-loving film freaks out there, this viewer has a good number of movies in his varied andf accumulated collection of films (...mine numbers in the 13,000's, as far as titles; how about yours, eh??), which on a whole, are not particularly great, and yet strangely still keepable in the sense that, in happenstance stumbling upon the odd, misfit of a film, when parousing for something else, one cannot help but irresistibly pull out and blow the dust off the oddball...dimly recalling how unremarkable it was, upon last viewing...and giving it another chance (...I mean, really...it couldn't have been THAT bad, right??)...perhaps even, in watching it in a different light, or a different mood, to find something sorely missed, on previous viewings. In the end, upon final credits roll, self-exclaiming, "...ah, now THAT'S why I found it so unremarkable..", putting it back in it's original, carefully preserved slot on the shelf...and yet, performing this whole ritual again, some months...even years later. Come on, you KNOW you do this, right?? Well, this viewer finds himself many a-time, doing this very thing...and in fact, in being afforded an opportunity to re-examine the rather odd, uneven and waywardly all-over-the-place 1986 horror flick, "The Vineyard", I was prepared and determined to find something in the film, this time around, to relish and embrace...to find that elusive sheen in the turd, so to speak. Uh, what was it, that someone once said about 'famous last words"??...

Movie Review: Predatory Instinct (2011)

David Hayes gave me a copy of this movie a couple of years ago but I forgot about it until I needed to find something to review. And as Abnormal Entertainment made this flick, I hope none of my musings offend any of my buds at AE or CHC.

Three young people get smooth talked into attending a party out in the fucking boondocks by the oh-so-dreamy Emmit. (Personally I think he talks too much and sounds like he was raised on Mark Twain and Machiavelli.) Randi's up for it because she a ho. Brandon is basically a male Randi. And Trish doesn't really want to go but she gets peer pressured into it. Ah, youth.

They drive down a dirt road for, like, ever, and Randi flips out at seeing....something. Though they've all been sneaking booze from the bar they work at since the afternoon so whatever. They finally arrive at the house party which in this movie means 6 attendees: our illustrious youngsters, Emmit, his tart, Lydia, and some random dude named Shea (sounds like HEY why didn't I STAY at home instead of coming to this LAME parTAY). I think they need a serious lesson from Kid n PLAY.

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #107 - 25 Minutes Too Long

The triumvirate of douche is complete this week, and Jeff, Kevin and Dave talk about Netflix original programming off of Kevin's review of Orange is the New Black. They each pick what show they'd love to see Netflix resurrect.

Dave reviews Hot Potato and Black Belt Jones. Jeff reviews The Incredible Melting Man and The Babysitter Massacre. Kevin reviews Race War: The Remake and The Demented.

Dave gives us an update on his Migo quest, and the boys share a contest to win Hell Hath No Fury from our own Peggy Christie. Find the link on our Facebook page.

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Movie Review: The Dark (1979)

There is nothing I like more than 1970s horror and sci-fi films. Truly. I believe that the entire filmmaking industry (from a narrative, not technical, standpoint) peaked in the 1970s and early 1980s. I love the wah-wah guitar riffs, bell bottoms and gas-guzzling sedans chewing up as much scenery as the actors do. Everything about the 1970s was stylized… especially the genre films. Yes, I’m biased. Yes, I’m a child of the 70s and 80s and, yes, there aren’t many finer examples of the genre than can be found in these two precious decades. Unless, of course, that film happens to be The Dark.

Blood Orgy of the Damned (2010) Movie Review

I don’t know exactly when this movie was made. I’m going to say it was about 15 years ago but it was re-released in 2010. Not because it was such a fantastic film but because the audio was completely lost and it was recorded at a live event where an improv comedy troupe performed voice overs as the film rolled. As I have not seen the original film with its original audio, I can’t honestly say whether or not the MST3K style set up I viewed makes this better or worse. All I know is I did LOL at a lot of the jokes. Also, I can’t say for sure what the original plot was so I’m making some assumptions based on the troupe humor.

BUY IT HERE!

Blood Orgy of the Damned starts off sometime in the past, possibly the 1700-1800s. Vampire hunter kills a vampire, who adjusts his wig before he bites it. No pun intended. Bad edit later and another vampire appears before the hunter but he looks like he’s from our time (21st century). He dies, too. So much for time travel.

100 years later (though the opening scene looked more like it was 200-300 years ago) a young girl is leafing through an ancient book. She falls asleep, like you do, and dreams about a vampire staring at her, a la Edward Cullen (I only read the first book, I swear), and then a bunch of hands are feeling up her naked body. For a long time. Seriously, there was an inordinate amount of groping in this scene.

This must have given our gal Friday a great idea because the next thing you know, she and a handful of her friends are lighting candles, getting drunk, and then reading from the book to resurrect an ancient vampire (YOU MUST NOT READ FROM THE BOOK!). They all fall asleep and the women dream about being wrapped in gauzy curtains and more groping.

Movie Review: L'Interieur (2011)

by Peggy Christie

Based on a short Twitter exchange with Paul Soter a few months ago (the red-headed adorable member of Broken Lizard, who brought us Super Troopers and Beerfest), I decided to give a French horror movie a try, despite the fact that, in the past, I’ve abhorred French horror.

Honestly, I can’t say whether I regret it or not. 

L’Interieur is about a pregnant woman, Sarah. She and her husband get into a car accident – she and their unborn baby survive, he does not. Flash forward a few months and Sarah discusses her scheduled delivery with the doctor. I don’t think it’s a c-section but apparently the delivery WILL be happening the next morning. All she needs to do is go home and get some rest.

The best laid plans…

Movie Review: Punk Vacation (Blu-ray, 1987)

The punk sub-genre had a really nice life during the 80s'. Class of 1984 and Suburbia come to mind as some essentially viewing for anyone interested in that period. Heck, even Return of the Living Dead had an oder of "punk" to the rampant brain-eating shenanigans. Vinegar Syndrome have dug up a punk film that I had no idea existed, a little flick called Punk Vacation from director Stanley Lewis and producer Stephen Fusci and given it the Blu-ray treatment - with an additional disc of goodies!

When a punk gang decides to go on a trip to get away from the congestion of the city they also bring trouble with them. Instead of relaxing, roasting marshmallows and telling ghost stories these motorcycle-riding Aqua Net abusers bring their own brand of foolishness with them when they start harassing a convenience store owner and his daughter, Sally (Karen Renee) over 40 cents lost in a soda machine.

Movie Review: Killing Lincoln (2013, Herzog & Co./Scott Free/20th Century Fox)

...since the term 'exploitation film' covers a pretty wide berth, as far as pinning down an all-encompassing, overall meaning of the term, and as such, might well be definitionally construed as something different, from group to group...even from person to person...it might as well be safe to say that the spansive moniker includes any interest-instilling speculative cinematic study...no matter how well researched...depicted in a dramatically sensationalist and emotionally manipulative meld. Such is the case, even with regards to the depiction of historical events...especially in particular, the assassination of public figures. In that respect, Abraham Lincoln's ill-fated death in 1865 has proven to be one of the most tragically and compellingly documented of such events in the annuls of American history; much speculation has been wrought from the events that transpired, during that time, due to unverifiable 'holes' in the backstory, as well as noted eyewitness inconsistencies. Surprisingly enough, there has been scant attempts to cinematically lay out the well-documented archival evidence of this case, in a sensical and practical manner; however, those attempts that HAVE been ambitiously produced, for the most part, have proven exploitatively intriguing and powerful enough to warrant viewer attention, in the overall search for, and ultimate presentation of at least a reasonable and logical, albeit understandably speculative truth. Despite this surprising, yet notable cinematic minimization, considering the historical impact of the event, coupled with an exploitative approach to the material, one might genuinely and cleverly see fit to coin the term, 'Lincoln-sploitation', as cliche as such a term might be considered; in viewing this recent docu-dramatization of the tragic events...this rustically slick, and keenly performed 2013 study, based upon the best selling non-fiction book, narrated by actor Tom Hanks, produced by Ridley & Tony Scott (...the latter of whom passed away, during production) for the National Geographic, and deemed a right-to-the-point, no-nonsense docu-drama, called "Killing Lincoln"...it is very dramatically presented that nothing could be closer to the truth...especially the suggestively relevating 'truth', outlaid herein...

Movie Review: The Incredible Melting Man (Blu-ray, 1977)

When I first experienced The Incredible Melting Man on Mystery Science Theater 3000 more than fifteen years ago, I thought to myself  "as bad as this is, this is far from the mind-numbing crap that's usually on this show". I could actually get through this B-flick without the best riffers in the world (Joel, Mike, Tom Servo, Crow and the gang) throwing in their clever barbs every few seconds. Scream Factory has taken the liberty to put William Sachs’ The Incredible Melting Man out in an ooey-gooey special edition Blu-ray that is sure please fans of this messy little masterpiece.

The plot is actually quite simple: Alex Rebar plays Astronaut “Steve West”, a man on a mission to take space exploration that much further than anyone before him. He does, but at a price, because now he is sitting in a hospital bed, gradually melting away thanks to a solar flare while gazing like a lecher at Saturn. After killing a rotund nurse, he emerges from the hospital, on the loose and suddenly an aggressive murderous creature. Fast on the syrupy heels of our cannibalistic melting creature is Dr.Ted Nelson (Burr DeBenning) who’s out to capture West before he gets too powerful during this sloppy metamorphosis.

John Carpenter's "Prince Of Darkness" to Debut on Blu-ray from Scream Factory!!

Get ready for the ultimate presentation of the heart-pounding supernatural thriller by heralded master of horror director John Carpenter (Halloween, The Fog, They Live) as the long-awaited PRINCE OF DARKNESS Collector’s Edition Blu-ray™ and DVD invade home entertainment shelves everywhere on SEPTEMBER 24 from SCREAM FACTORY. Available for the first time on Blu-ray, this collector’s edition is brimming with insightful extras, including new interviews with John Carpenter and Alice Cooper, special audio commentary and much more!

Donald Pleasence (Halloween), Jameson Parker (Simon & Simon), Lisa Blount (Needful Things), rock icon Alice Cooper, Victor Wong and Dennis Dun (both from Carpenter’s Big Trouble In Little China) star in this gripping suspense thriller on the terrifying battle between mankind and the ultimate evil.  A group of graduate students and scientists uncover an ancient canister in an abandoned church. When they open it, they inadvertently unleash a strange liquid and an evil force on all of humanity. As the liquid turns their co-workers into zombies, the remaining members realize they have released the most unspeakable horror of them all. Terror mounts as the team must fight to save the world from a devilish fury that has been contained for over seven million years.

Movie Review: Skull World (Blu-ray, 2013)

There's really nothing better than a documentary that truly goes a different route than the norm. Many filmmakers, whilst doing a documentary on a subject are just content on you something you already have some knowledge on. That’s boring though…gimme something unique.  Once in a while you get hit upside the head with a giant cardboard hammer of a movie that enlightens you to a society that you never knew existed, much like the Braveheart-esque battle antics of "Box Wars". This isn't the "medieval tap your sword on a guy and he's dead" douchebaggery in a park, these are balls-out battles, that can get pretty physical. Welcome to Justin McConnell's Skull World, if you dare!

Skull Man (AKA Greg Sommer) is a celebrity of sorts in the Toronto area, putting on Box War battles, while donning elaborate cardboard costumes, and his signature Skull Man mask .Box Wars is pretty much an underground sport that originated in Australia. Sommer is on a mission to make box wars bigger than life in any way possible, bringing in friends, putting time in the weight room curling his dogs...whatever it takes, because this guy is "metal" and lives his life to the fullest.

Movie Review: Watch Over Me (2013, Digital Playground)

Alright, ladies and gentlemen, step right up... look closely now...Watch what this hand is doing...Watch it, now...Don't look away, or you'll miss something amazing...and, presto!! See?? The other hand does something even more amazing. The finest prestidigitators will allure, seduce and manipulate the hapless observer with his adept skill...with the most devious of twists and turns...distracting enough to covertly veil what the magician actually has in mind. There's a certain satisfying revelation, in being fooled by the magician...even when the so-called 'magician' is an equally adept film writer. Most film aficionados can rattle off a plethora of general audience movies, which upheld that delightfully manipulative ability to draw to the right...keeping the viewer from seeing what's happening on the left...until that foremost moment, when the 'magic' takes place. However, one might be quite amusingly taken aback, when that same seductive and deceptive ploy is unexpectedly thrown into the steamy proceedings, within the unconventional realm of adult film entertainment. Unexpected, yes...but in the adroit and able-bodied direction of film-maker Robby D...quite well executed, and resulting in his latest moody and tension-edged sexual excursion, 2013's "Watch Over Me."

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #106 - Kriegerin!

Kevin and Dave mourn Dennis Farina, and they somehow work it around into a bad place. They review The Dark, Combat Girls and Biology 101.

They discuss Kevin Smith's new project, which is a weird horror story. They also get derailed by Thomas the Tank Engine before Dave talks abuot his Migo collection.

Dave also announces the winner of the Cannibal Fat Camp contest.

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Movie Review: Biology 101 (2011)

The best part of Biology 101 is how incredibly relevant it is. The film, the first feature from writer/director Christopher Smith, touches on aspects of media manipulation, desire, hedonism and sex addiction in a manner that is relevant and, by all accounts, common. The presentation of this content does suffer a bit from the pacing of the film and what seems to be a reluctance to fully explore the inherent darkness in the subject matter. Regardless, Biology 101 does take upon itself the challenge of difficult material where many films would not, despite the lack of real depth.

Movie Review: Perfect Understanding (1933, Blu-ray)

Directed by Cyril Gardner
Movie Review by Greg Goodsell

Too rich and too thin couple Judy (Gloria Swanson) and Nicholas Randall (26-year-old Laurence Olivier) wish to marry, but don’t want to be held down by the constraints of one-man, one-woman. They both sign a prenuptial agreement to rule out any jealousy, amounting to an “open marriage.” They marry, with so-called friend Ivan (John Halliday) burning with covetousness over the off-the-market Judy. They have a whirlwind honeymoon through Europe, which includes Germany (considering the time of this film’s release, probably wasn’t that much fun!) and France. Judy returns home to London while in the meantime, Nicholas engages in a boat race that involves downing cocktails while piloting motorboats in Cannes. In this prescient version of The Hunger Games, no one is killed but Nicholas is injured in a collision. He is nursed back to health in an intimate manner by old friend Stephanie (Nora Swinburne). Nicholas confesses the affair to Judy, who runs to the arms of Ivan in retaliation – there are the expected complications, but will true love win out in the end?

Perfect Understanding is a remarkable film on many several levels, but there exists a serious roadblock in enjoying the film today. The example of an early “soundie,” the muffled dialogue is very hard to hear over the incessant musical soundtrack. Subtitles for the hard of hearing would have been a very welcome extra. Swanson, who was losing favor with the advent of sound after enjoying silent screen icon status, produced the film herself. There is an awful lot of young, emerging talent on view. Olivier is extremely awkward in one of his first motion picture roles, but one hears he had a pretty dim view of his film work, preferring the stage. The racy for its time script is the work of 27-year-old Michael Powell, the acclaimed writer-director of The Red Shoes and Peeping Tom (1960).

Movie Review: Comic-Con, Episode IV: A Fan's Hope (2011, Wrekin Hill/Warrior Poet)

...despite having once proudly been amongst the 'brethren species' of devotedly obsessed comic book 'geeks' (...although quite candidly, I DO occasional peek through the cracked-open door, to see how things...characters, exploits, format, etc, have since changed since my youth, my comic book collecting days...eh, pretty much snuffed, in the onset of my military stint) , this viewer has to readily admit really getting a brazenly giddy kick out of the crazed and outrageous visual spectacle that IS the yearly San Diego-based International Comic Book Convention...or quite simply, Comic-Con. The inspired, wildly imaginative, and...well, let's face it...quite lucrative costumes. The colorful, anticipation-building, cinematic advertising blitz of just about every major movie studio's upcoming offerings in the genre. The veritable cornucopia of vendors, eager to sell anything, from t-shirts to posters, from collectible toys & figures to that rare DVD-R of 'Ricochet Rabbit' cartoons, and everything in-between (...and of course, comic books). The cheer-inducing, star-studded forums, nostalgically reveling what has come to pass, and anticipatively revealing what is in the works, in the vast world of the popular arts. The progressively wide-spreading interactive-ness of the proceedings, as the city of San Diego itself, spectacularly adorns itself in genre-celebrative decor...

TV on DVD Review: Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, Season Three (1995/96)

...having been wrought from a generation, which at a younger age, went salivatingly ga-ga over Godzilla & Gamera movies, Ultra Man & Johnny Sokko episodes, Infra-Man and Gigantor, this viewer often found it so easy to diss the occasional, wayward, stumbled upon, broadcast episode of this 'what-the-heck-is-it' TV oddity, called 'Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers'; after all, in the onset, the whole franchise seemed nothing more than an adolescent-geared hybrid knock-off of ideas and concepts previously explored...albeit in a somewhat more hallucinogenic meld (...jovially, I recall an episode of VH1's "I Love the '90's", where Dee Snider, of Twisted Sister, spoke of how his own kids 'got caught up in this mind**** of a show'). Given a viewing of sporadic episodes, here and there, this viewer vaguely caught onto the ideas, interlaced into the show's super-hero-istic forefront, whereby each episode would invoke a simple-to-understand level of drama amongst the dynamic martial arts monster fighting...sometimes even exuding poignant concepts on human values and social behavior...once again, emulating the old 'let's trick kids into learning' diversion...something which, despite being as equally deceptive, was much more apparent and obvious, back in the '70's, with the 'Schoolhouse Rock' thing, and instructively preached, epilogued portions of Saturday morning kids shows. And so, when afforded the opportunity to examine the crust of a whole season of the "...Rangers", this viewer's first reaction was...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! The Agony!!! The Horror!!! The Torture!!!...

Movie Review: Only God Forgives (2013)

Review By: Rob Sibley

I'm going to say this upfront, you are either going to love or hate this film. Nicolas Winding Refn returns with his latest film “Only God Forgives”. Refn made his first film back in 1996, the excellent “Pusher”. But the film that put him on a lot of peoples maps was 2011's “Drive”. Drive quickly has become a cult hit and Ryan Gosling's stoic character of “Driver” surely has become one of the more memorable anti-heros of the last decade. Drive could have been your typical mainstream crime & fast cars flick (Fast and Furious I'm looking at you.) But thanks to to Refn's excellent direction the film became it's own beast. With Only God Forgives Refn tackles a genre that's been done to death, the revenge film and once again has put his own unique spin on it.

Like I said earlier, you're either going to love or hate this film. I also can't express enough, don't go in expecting Drive 2. The only connection is Refn & Gosling, the similarities end there. To me if anything I felt almost like I was watching a spiritual sequel to the Refn film “Fear X”. Fear X was made back in 2003 & was written by none other then the great Hubert Selby Jr. It was sadly dumped DTV in the US. It pretty much bombed world wide and nearly made Refn's production company go bankrupt. To save himself Refn made Pusher 2 & 3 for the sole purpose to pull his production company out of debt. Fear X featured an oscar worthy performance from John Tuturro.

Movie Review: Corruption (1968, Columbia Pictures/Grindhouse Releasing)

...why exactly is Peter Cushing...or rather, why is the character he plays in the sleazy, tension-filled, slightly campy and unflinchingly visceral 1968 horror thriller "Corruption"...renowned surgeon Dr. John Rowan, so freakin' mad, huh?? I mean, we're not talking something as simple as 'just stubbed my big toe on the curb', 'dammit, someone took my last jello in the 'fridge' or 'yer' cheatin' at cards, pard'ner' mad, here. No sirree, Bob...we're talking something more like outright mad-as-a-hatter, complete mental breakdown, 'I'm gonna chase ya' down, and if I catch ya', I'm gonna slice ya' up with this scalpel', blood-lusting psycho killer mad. At least, for this viewer, that was the first impression, in first becoming privy of the 1968 film, "Corruption"...

...before eliciting a conclusive 'theory' to this query, given this opportunity to view "Corruption" for the first time, this viewer cannot help but kick things off by expressing an absolute love of movies trailers...especially those wrought from the guilded age of the drive-in and grindhouse cinema, from the mid '60's...say, to the mid '80's. As they are obviously intended to do, the movie trailers 'sell' the film, and the more viscerally descriptive and exploitatively in-your-face, the trailer is, the better to draw in the eager, albeit unsuspecting viewer...especially this viewer. In some cases 'exploitative' is almost synonymous to 'deceptive', and often, such deceptive exploitation can fool the hapless viewer into thinking that the film is something that it ultimately proves not to be. More than often enough, this strategy culminates into the trailer being something better than the movie itself; however, there's the occasion when a movie trailer, in being evasive, deceptive, and at the same time exploitative, hides the fact that the movie itself is a powderkeg, and the trailer...as shamelessly circus-barker impressive as it might be, or tries to be...is merely an anticipatory fuse...

Movie Review: Sex Hunter 1980 (1980, Nikkatsu/Impulse/Synapse)

...really gotta hand it to the folks over at the Nikkatsu Film Corporation, during their successful reign of what they have coined 'Roman Porno' (...that's 'romantic pornography'...though, this viewer originally assumed that the 'roman' moniker, referred to a flavor of Roman eroticism, which actually might be understandable, to some, in such an assumption). Most of their productions (...at least, the one's which this viewer has thus far partaken of) have allowed viewers to engage a rather compelling storyline, amidst the graphic sexcapades, which these films are normally known for. And these storylines are, for the most part, interesting enough to captivate and draw the unwary viewer in...until such point that the often graphic & fetish-flavored eroticism kicks in, and hits the viewer with a shock to the system, not unlike that of an ounce of everclear, instantly hitting the brain. And such is the case, once again, with a recently released episode from 1980, called "Sex Hunter"...a torrid tale, made exponentially all the more reflective of the imitable Nikkatsu storytelling style, in that the main character, herself, embraces a subtle innocence...a vulnerable and naive innocence, which is abruptly and shockingly made corrupt, through a trial of eroticism, most outrageous and forbidden...

Movie Review: Tower Block (2012, Blu-ray)

Review By: Rob Sibley

Shout Factory has brought us a nice little treat from across the pond. That flick is “Tower Block”, the flick is a lean, mean and vicious machine. Directed with a break neck pace by first time filmmakers James Nunn & Ronnie Thompson. This little flick was written by James Moran who's a veteran of British television. He's written episodes for everything from Doctor Who, Torchwood & Primeval. Unlike those series that were heavy on the syfy, this film is set firmly in reality. If anything the film is more akin to Moran's first writing credit, the criminally underrated horror/comedy “Severance”. Tower Block isn't a horror film at all but the film features a tight script and breathless suspense. Moran even injects a bit of humor here and there to lighten things up a bit. The flick falls in line with other siege movies, Assault on Precinct 13 being one of the biggest influences.

Even the brief opening text echoes Precinct 13 while informing you of the history of tower blocks. “The Tower Block was first built for affordable living after the world war. Communities welcomed them as their excellent views made them popular places to live. They deteriorated and became a breeding ground for crime and violence. Re-developers took over, knocking them down. However, it's not easy moving out existing tenants. Serenity House awaits demolition. The top floor residents are the final people left to be rehoused.”. The films tone is set right from the start as a young man runs for his life, being chased by two hooded thugs. He runs into the Serenity Tower Block and bangs on doors, only to be ignored by the tenants. As they listen behind locked doors to the sounds of the teen being beat to death. This scene sadly has to much resemblance to reality where people often turn a blind eye to the events unfolding around them.

Disturbing Documentary "Zero Killed" Coming From Cult Epics!

Controversial Documentary Film about the Most discussed Topic in the News!

ZERO KILLED

Premieres on DVD: July 23, 2013

Los Angeles, CA (July 2013.) If someone murdered a person you love, how would you feel about it? Are soldiers murderers? Should torture be legalized? How to define good and evil? Since 1996 film director Michal Kosakowski has been asking people with different backgrounds about their murder fantasies and staged these as short films.

The Awards winning film ‘Zero Killed’ is an unconventional hybrid of feature film and documentary, that makes viewers question their personal and social positions concerning ethical and moral values and taboos. This candid confessional of the taboo criminal fantasies, which exist in the minds of normal people is shocking. Fictional crime stories may flood today’s cinemas, but this copulation of fictional crimes challenges us all to look more deeply into the mirror, or more closely at our neighbor. Is evil inside all of us?

Movie Review: Cleavagefield (2009)

I knew better. I knew better. I knew better. I knew that watching a movie called Cleavagefield would be a bad idea. I knew it would suck. I knew that there would be a lot of nudity and that, my dear friends, was the only reason I stuck around. Earlier in my film career I was dealt a horrific blow. Being young, broke and semi-retarded, I flew to the beautiful shores of California to be in a good friend of mine’s feature film. We were shooting a monster movie and, in my naivety, I thought this would be the greatest film ever made. It was not, in retrospect, but we did have fun and I made friends that have lasted in upwards of a decade. Nevertheless, during the production of this epic I learned a hard lesson. I had thought, due to my participation in boobie-filled masterpieces like Shower of Blood, that nudity of any kind was not only good, but necessary. I discovered, much to my own chagrin and completely by surprise, that there is such a thing as bad nudity. I know the twenty-somethings out there just sucked in a shocked breath and the sixty-somethings, bereft of mammaries of any kind for a long time, just shook their heads in shame. You thirties through the fifties, though, you know. The pair of ‘breasts’ that graced that film were not only horrible, but resembled two fly strips stapled to Alice Cooper’s chest. The title of the film will, of course, remain nameless, but the mental scars remain. These scars were re-opened by Cleavagefield and, not content to make me go fetal and sob like Jeff at a Chinese buffet, the bastards shot salty fluids into the wounds. Aargh.

Movie Review: Crimewave (1985, Embassy/Shout Factory)

...this viewer, like many of you out there, without a doubt, harbor an undeniable cherished spot for the early Warner Brothers 'Looney Tunes', and the classic MGM Tex Avery-produced cartoons. Those hilariously senseless and maniacally frenzied little snippets of animation, which once graced the sandwiched intermissions of many a theatrical double feature, and eventually relegated to Saturday morning kiddie viewing fare. Without a doubt, it had often been suggested...and at times, genuinely attempted...to translate such frenzied insanity and hilariously bent wackiness to live action motion pictures (...see 1966's "The Great Race" and 1980's "The Villain", just to name a couple). How unexpected is was, for fledgling director Sam Raimi...having just dismounted the cult cinemania whirlwind, with his campy, over-the-top horror entry from 1981, the now-classic "The Evil Dead"...only to throw HIS hat into the arena, as far as flying his own 'screw ball' banner, and taking on such unconventional material...'unconventional', as compared to "The Evil Dead", that is. And the result?? As notoriously patchwork, scattered and uneven, albeit outrageously nutty as 1985's wacky "Crimewave" is (...originally conceived as "The XYZ Murders"), it remains an intriguingly curious and odd little comedy ditty, which is inexplicably hard to turn away from, once engaged...a flavorful bit of comic film noir, that's seems missing a questionably undetermined ingredient, yet remaining equally questionable, as to why it's oh-so damn irresistible..

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #105 - Web of Lies

Kevin and Jeff discuss the recent reviewer scandals concerning Rex Reed's refusal to watch the movies he reviews and Lianne Spiderbaby's blatant plagiarism.

They also reviews a variety of movies, including the crazy doc Skull World, the moon Nazis filled Iron Sky, the creepy Mold and Bug, and the classics Demon Knight and Slaughterhouse-Five.

Don't forget to enter our Cannibal Fat Camp contest to win a copy of Dave's book!

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

You can always email us at cinemaheadcheese@yahoo.com or tweet us @CinHeadCheese.

Support Cinema Head Cheese and Abnormal Entertainment by clicking the links on our Sponsors page!

Movie Review: Nacho Mountain (2009)

It never occurred to me that B movies could be NOT horror. I mean, if you don't have rolling heads and gushing blood and chewy entrails then what's the point? Well, Dirt Productions has answered that question with Nacho Mountain.

Keefer is your average 9-5 working man. He gets to work, jerks off to a lot of porn websites, takes bets on who can eat how much at lunch, jerks off to some more porn, collects his pay check and goes home to his girlfriend. When the boss man founds out just how much porn Keefer has been surfing, his ass is fired. When he gets home to break the bad news to his girlfriend, he finds her bonking a transvestite. Her excuse? Well, she wasn't quite ready for a threesome with another girl (you know, for Keefer's benefit) so she thought screwing a guy dressed as a girl would be a good start. Yeah. She's blonde.

So now Keefer has no job, no girl, and no place to live. While visiting with his local weed dealer, Coopy (played with an appropriate amount of hilarious twitching and tweaking by Armando Merlo), he's issued a ticket by the local Dukes o' Hazard doucheknockers, Officers Slivjak and Biggsley. As he relates his sob story to his buddy, Meegosh (I shit you not), a dimly lit light bulb moment occurs: Keefer should organize and run an underground eating competition.

Movie Review: The Howling (Collector's Edition Blu-ray, 1981)

Werewolves have always had a soft spot in my heart since I was a youngster taking in creature features on Sunday afternoons. The first couple films to really give me that burst of lycanthrope excitement were, John Landis’ An American Werewolf in London and Joe Dante’s The Howling.  There have been others like, The Wolfman, The Company of Wolves, Silver Bullet and even the more recent Dog Soldiers but nothing came close to the grand scale of those two classics. Scream Factory has thankfully taken the time to give Joe Dante’s film a loaded Blu-ray release for fans to salivate over, much like our canine friends. I recently got a chance to sink my teeth into it and, well, it doesn’t disappoint.

Dee Wallace Stone plays news reporter Karen White, a brave gal who helps the authorities by attempting to trap a serial killer. Things don’t over particularly after the cops gun down the killer as our heroine is severely traumatized by the whole situation. This incident calls for  some serious R & R for her, so she, along with her hubbie, William (the late Christopher Stone) take a journey into the woods to a colony of fairly friendly folks who are as hospitable as can be for the couple.

The couple starts to see that things are exactly what they seem, and that while they may be away from the carnage of the serial killer they could be somewhere worse – in the middle of a colony of ferocious, horny and very hungry werewolves.

Movie Review: Castle Freak (1995, Blu-ray)

Stuart Gordon's splash onto the horror genre scene in the mid 1980's with the superb film incarnations of H.P Lovecraft's short stories, Re-Animator and From Beyond was truly a thing of beauty. They had scares, heaping doses of splatter and surprisingly fun bits of humor throughout the films. Both movies literally made genre fans slip and slide on the ooey, gooey genius of the horror icon.

Both From Beyond and Re-Animator were produced through Charles Band's Empire Pictures, these critical successes paved way to a nice solid career that led to other, different projects. One such project, with Charles Band again and his Full Moon Features Company was Castle Freak. After hitting both VHS and DVD this uplifting story about a slobbering, grunting, flesh-eating cretin living in a castle basement is now on glorious Blu-ray.

Movie Review: Adjust Your Tracking: The Untold Story of the VHS Collector (2013)

Reviewed by: John Beutler

Directed by: Dan Kinem and Levi Peretic

Well, I'll be damned!! I'm not alone, in this obsession!! This viewer was recently elated to discover not being so much the misfit, as had originally thought!! I can now proudly peruse through my precious (...ooooo!! My precious...my precious!!) and treasured collection of rare & artfully boxed VHS videotapes, hang my head high, and know that I belong to a much bigger 'brotherhood'...a subtly growing brotherhood, which has remained stubbornly steadfast, in embracing and preserving the long-thought-dead VHS format. Yes, folks...I can now openly sing the praises, and revel in my fellow collectors' collective appreciation and passion, after having recently partaken of the amusingly spotlighting documentary, "Adjust Your Tracking: The Untold Story of the VHS Collector"...

In examining the arguably  warranted reasons for hanging onto these cherished relics...Is it merely because of certain out-of-print-and-now-ultra-rare-and-obscure film titles not yet released in a digital format (...just gotta quest myself a copy of the herein featured and suggested, ultra-rare and never-heard-of title, "Tales from the Quadead Zone", which several of the collectors in this documentary, pridefully gush over themselves, in possessing in their collections), and now worth tens, even hundreds of dollars?? Could it possibly be the exclusive-to-the-format, beautifully unique and artistically striking artwork on the video boxes, themselves (...my personal favorites, being amongst the exquisitely rendered, artfully original, old Wizard Video big-box tapes)?? Might it perhaps be the surprising durability of the format, itself (...especially those seemingly indestructable, clunky, back-breaking, 90-pound, top-loading machines), as opposed to the easily scratched and thusly, viewing-hampering digital format?? Or maybe it's for the outright nostalgic feel of the format (...those pops, scratches and dropouts surprisingly enhanced many genre movie titles, countless rented and played...almost giving the look and feel of grainy, well-worn 'grindhouse' prints), which many of us movie lovers/collectors remember oh so well. In general, it quite possibly comes right down to the fact that VHS was definitely the dawn of technologically collectable fantasy fulfillment, as far as regularly watching uncut and uninterrupted movies at home, in a format which afforded oneself the opportunity to building one's own personal movie collection. At any rate, no matter the reason, all such views and facets...and more are amusingly & candidly bantered about herein, by a colorfully enthusiastic, select group of characters, who appear most unswervingly dedicated to the cause of salvaging, embracing and proudly upholding the still-embraceable virtues of films rendered on the widely considered obsolete, albeit clearly still-to-some, quite alluring VHS tape format...a format not necessarily, exclusively and collect-ably embraced by merely the film content of the tape, itself...as this amusing documentive study reveals...

Movie Review: The Prowler (1981)

First off, I have to tell everyone that I love the slasher sub-genre of horror films. I cut my teeth on them as a wee lad and have appreciated the minimalist effectiveness of the good ones. I’ve also lamented to the heavens about the bad ones. Through the years, beginning around 1978, the slasher took off and began to set box office records. Classics like Halloween, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Friday the 13^th and My Bloody Valentine set the stage for a horror boon market that had a pretty good run. The slasher film quickly became derivative and a mockery of itself as the ‘group of teens in danger from a psychotic mass murderer’ formula began to play itself out. The mid-90s saw a resurgence in the slasher film, most notably from Wes Craven’s Scream, that saw the sub-genre become self-referential, almost a meta-film wherein the audience, and the filmmakers, were fully aware of the cliché. The 90s also presented the world with prosumer home video equipment and that, my dear friends, is where the biggest issue lies. The slasher film, because of its budget-friendly nature, was the genre of choice for backyard hacks with a video camera and some dopey friends. This, more so than the original surge of product in the 1980s, has given the slasher film a bad reputation. It is good, though, to remember our roots and Blue Underground’s blu-ray release of The Prowler does just that.

Buy The Prowler [Blu-ray]!

Movie Review: Reform School Girls (1986)

"You're just a shit stain on the panties of life."

Would you ever say that to Wendy O. Williams? Neither would I. But apparently Edna, the matron of the Pridemore Juvie Home for Girls, doesn't give a damn.

Reform School Girls is a highly entertaining exploitation flick from 1986. Jenny has chosen a bummer of a boyfriend. Apparently she volunteered to be the wheel man for her beau's late night robbery and the resulting shoot out (but he promised no guns!) and car crash lands her first time offender tushie in reform school. Though she thinks the hard part is over (read: doesn't have to rot in jail with all the other hardened 15 year olds), Jenny is in for a rude awakening.

Welcome to Pridemore Juvenile Home, bitch.

Movie Review: A Haunting at Silver Falls (2013, Outsider Pictures)

...ya' know, one really has to wonder, just what is it about lingeringly restless and supposedly 'wronged' ghosts & specters...in particular, those of the cinematic fervor...and their ethereal and other-worldly stasis, forcibly tethered in this world...a torturous limbo...still managing to take with them, a wholly human, demandantly unswerving, relentlessly unforgiving and self-serving sense of justice and purpose?? Supposed 'unfinished business', as often coined...hauntingly insistent upon commanding the attention of the living, despite their limited and handicapped ability to fully communicate, and yet able to exude frustration, anger, rage and fury...sometimes physically...when those whom they are haunting, just can't seem to get the message, right from the get-go. And what about those haplessly haunted...forced to delve into uncertain mystery and intrigue...sometimes getting in way over their heads...in an effort to appease the haunting spirit, invariably plaguing them...

...come on, 'dead' people (...clap, clap); wake up and smell the afterlife...Let's get on with it, huh!!

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #104 - Emotional Hermaphrodite

Kevin and Dave talk about movies that made them cry, including a few embarrassing choices. Get your tissues ready for some spoiler tears.

Kevin reviews Ten Minute Podcast, the Vine app and a plethora of Vine feeds.

Don't forget to enter our Cannibal Fat Camp contest to win a copy of Dave's book!

Check out Kevin's latest Vine video in all of its beardy goodness here.

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

You can always email us at cinemaheadcheese@yahoo.com or tweet us @CinHeadCheese.

Support Cinema Head Cheese and Abnormal Entertainment by clicking the links on our Sponsors page!

Movie Review: Message from Space (1978)

To be honest, I only watched this film because I was looking for movies with Hiroyuki Sanada on Netflix streaming. Since I had already seen Twilight Samurai (excellent film, btw), the only other choice was Message from Space. And considering he was only 18 when the movie came out, I'm guessing he was trying to get some movie experience under his belt (after playing "fighter" in Shogun Samurai, another film that came out the same year). Doesn't really matter as I was entertained, mostly, by this cheesy sci-fi Star Wars rip off. It's one of those great films from the 70s where half the cast is American, speaking English, and the other half is Japanese, speaking Japanese but dubbed in English. Distracting in a way but it adds to the fun factor. Sort of.

The most annoying thing about this flick is the narrator, though, who has to tell us half of what's going on because they either couldn't afford to film it or they thought the audience would be too stupid to figure it out.

Gelusia (aka tree hugging hippies) is conquered by Gavana (not hippies so they're automatically assholes) a race of silver faced fighters who love war and conquering. Gelusia refused to submit and most of them are killed off. The King sends eight magic seeds out into the universe, which basically look like radioactive walnuts, to find warriors to fight for and save what remains of Gelusia. The King's daughter, Emeralida, and a Gelusian fighter, Urocco, will follow the seeds, pick up the chosen warriors, and return. And they follow in a literal ship, like a clipper with the big masts and giant sails. Like maybe Jack Sparrow should be heading up this mission.

Well, the Gavanians can't have that so they attack the ship. They don't stop it but they screw it up enough that it ends up being a wreck of a floater. But that's okay. We're about to meet a few of the chosen warriors as they stumble upon the Gelusian ship.

The Gruesome Slasher Movie That's Driving Real Horror Fans Wild!

We at Cinema Head Cheese really love the return of the Retro Big Box VHS releases, but even we have our own favorite that you MUST get your hands on before it's sold out for good. It's a little film called Bloody Bloody Bible Camp and it's only available from our friends at Cult Movie Mania. If your on the fence, see what our very own Kevin Moyers has to say in this rave review of Vito Trabucco's splat-tastic masterpiece

What other folks are saying about Bloody Bloody Bible Camp.

Cult Movies Magazine says, “...it’s the best slasher flick they’ve seen in years.”

HorrorNews.net calls it “...a twisted and perverted little masterpiece.”

And Blogomatic3000.com proclaims it to be “...a shining beacon of sleaze, perversion, and offensiveness. In other words, it’s fantastic!”

We couldn’t agree more.

But, in the world of horror there is one endorsement that holds more weight than any other.

Satan’s.

Let’s face it. Horror movies are pretty much a celebration of his handy work.

And just like horror fans and critics around the world...

Satan loves Bloody Bloody Bible Camp.

To get the RARE, LIMITED EDITION collector's set of this new cult classic, CLICK HERE.

Movie Review: Airborne (2012)

What could be better than a long flight with Mark Hamill?  Definitely not a movie about a long flight where Mark Hamill is an air traffic controller. This isn't the best way to start a review. I understand that. Listen, I don't like to bash unless something is insulting to watch. By that, I mean that someone either didn't try or didn't care.

Mark Hamill tried. Mark Hamill cared. In some ways, I feel like he's only one of a handful that did. This movie is definitely not on par with one of our favorite Twilight Zone episodes. You know the one. It just isn't. This was supposed to be terrifying, but something just didn't work. Call it lack of talent or lack of story. I call it lack of interest.

FEARnet Presents A "Reaper" Reunion Special

Hello everyone,

This is Jacob O'Neal from The Gorram Nerd Hour. Kevin Moyers had asked me to come over to Cinema Head Cheese to do a guest review for the blog. Knowing I am a huge fan of the short lived CW series Reaper he gave me the screener that was sent to him by the great folks at FEARnet. It started with a reunion special and then went into the pilot episode. The reunion special was roughly about a half hour and started with the four main cast members (Bret Harrison, Tyler Labine, Ray Wise & Rick Gonzalez) being interviewed about their time on the series. Later they were joined by Christine Willies, Ken Marino and the creators of the show Tara Butters & Michelle Fazakis.

What first struck me about this reunion was that each of the actors seemed to genuinely love their characters, miss the show and each other.  In fact, Ray Wise was dressed in a suit with one of the original neck ties from the show. Willies came out wearing horns and immediately began talking about her make out session with Labine on the show. Labine and Harrison both expressed their great love for the show and how the fans blamed them for why they didn't get a third season. The CW dragged their feet on renewing the show and each of those actors took pilots for new series. They also speculate as to whether that's the reason their other shows didn't do very well. Hell hath no fury like a Reaper fan scorned. Take that, Sons Of Tucson!

Movie Review: In a Glass Cage (1987, Blu-ray)

There was a time back in my more formative years (around the mid-90's) where I was on this kick to find the most disturbing or gross films ever made. Titles like Ruggero Deotato's Cannibal Holocaust, Pasolini's Salo: 120 Days of Sodom and Men Behind the Sun were some of my absolute favorites when it came to these amazing taboo-breaking films. Agusti Villaraonga's In a Glass Cage also stood high among these classic shockers.

Buy In A Glass Cage on Blu-ray or DVD

At the time there was no DVD, nor a good quality version of In a Glass Cage (I actually watched it in Spanish and I suck at Spanish!). The 2000's came and genre DVD/Blu-ray producer, Cult Epics put out a very nice DVD version with English subtitles. Cult Epics has done some fine work with recent Blu-ray upgrades so it was only natural to make Villaronga's notorious 1987 film a reality.

Cinematic Hell: Fist of Fear, Touch of Death (1980)

by Hal Astell

Director: Matthew Mallinson

Stars: Bruce Lee, Fred Williamson and Ron Van Clief


Buy Fist of Fear, Touch of Death on DVD

Bruceploitation is a wild and crazy world, one conjured into existence by filmmakers in Hong Kong, China and Taiwan after the death of Bruce Lee in 1973. Lee had been the breakthrough to whole new markets for them, becoming an international superstar and iconic figure around the globe, especially after Enter the Dragon, which was a Hollywood production shot mostly in English. Everyone knew who Bruce Lee was in the same way everyone knew who Charlie Chaplin was. Yet now he was dead and so couldn't make another movie. So they conjured up a successor. Actually they conjured up a lot of successors. What seemed like everyone in Asian cinema suddenly changed their name to either Bruce or Lee and they suddenly starred in films with portmanteau titles of other Bruce Lee movies.

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #103 - The Black Widow of Cabot Cove

Dave discusses his love for a mystery solving Angela Lansbury. He and Kevin also talk about the rest of the elderly television sleuths, kids shows that starred adults and the many celebrities we lost over the last week. They also give their thoughts on who portrayed which DC superheroes the best.

Jeff chimes in with a few reviews, including Amerikan Holokaust and Lost Faith from CHC favorite Joel Wynkoop.

Don't forget to enter our Cannibal Fat Camp contest to win a copy of Dave's book!

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

You can always email us at cinemaheadcheese@yahoo.com or tweet us @CinHeadCheese.

Support Cinema Head Cheese and Abnormal Entertainment by clicking the links on our Sponsors page!

Movie Review: Shoot First, Die Later (1974, Blu-ray)

Raro Video has taken it upon themselves over the past few years to release numerous classic film works from writer/director Fernando Di Leo. There was the excellent release of Live Like a Cop, Die Like a Man, a Blu-ray boxset with four of his finest films (Caliber 9, Rulers of the City, The Boss and The Italian Connection) and now the recently released Shoot First, Die Later in a Blu-ray special edition is finally available. If you’re itching for some no-nonsense, violent Polizia, Mr. Di Leo rarely disappoints.

Shoot First, Die Later centers around Domenico Malacarene (Luc Merenda, Torso) a not-so squeaky clean cop who lives slightly better than his fellow officers because he accepts money from the city's crime syndicate. Outside from a little corruption here and there, Domenico actually seems like a regular guy who likes to spend time with his girlfriend, Sandra (Delia Boccardo, Massacre in Rome). The only problem here is he gets way in over his head. His father also works in the police department but doesn't quite dabble in these illicit affairs.

TV on DVD Review: Todd & The Book of Pure Evil: Season 2

Anyone that knows me knows that I love this series. Unfortunately, this was the second and final season to air on Canadian television. Thankfully, crowd funding allows for an animated feature to wrap up the story. That's right, we'll see an animated move that will bring us the final act of the amazing adventures of Todd, Jimmy, Atticus and the rest of the crew. Before that happens, let's get into a little bit of the second season.

I'll do my best to give you a rundown without many spoilers, because you can find this streaming or on DVD, and I really want you people to grab on to this series and soak it all in. Those of you that saw the first season, however, can read ahead and get just a little taste of what's in store for you. It's phenomenal.