Frame from Critters Attack! (2019) |
Becoming a successful actor is a trap! Whereas when you start your
career on small independent films you shoot a protagonist role in 2-3 weeks and
the critics love your performance, while when you become part of the system and
employed in big-budget films it takes that amount of times to shoot a merely
bit-part and the critics will hate your guts. Not that this advice to aspiring
young actors has anything to do with the present article, but I couldn’t come
up with any more relevant introduction.
Critters Attack! (2019)
Critters Attack! (2019)
Unable to entertain Trissy (TV actress Ava Preston), Jake (TV actor Jack
Fulton), and Phillip (TV actor Jaeden Noel), their babysitter Drea (Tashiana
Washington) takes them to the nearby park, where they discover a good (and
white) Critter which they take back home with them. The problem however is that
myriad of bad (and black) Critters have also landed in the area, and they are
causing mayhem with their three rows of teeth and arrow-throwing backs. Dee
(franchise favorite and overall horror icon Dee Wallace) will come to the
rescue.
On the wake of the box-office success of the Gremlins duo (1984 – 1990), the Critters
franchise (1986 – ongoing) proved to be the best competitor of sorts and its
cult following is huge up to this day. However, the last we heard of from
Crites (as the monsters are called in the film by many of the main characters)
was back in 1992. That is until Critters:
A New Binge (2019) was released to not too much acclaim (I haven’t seen it,
but from what I heard it’s pretty bad). This was quickly followed by the
feature under review, which although it did not cause a stir either, it is
quite enjoyable.
For a film called Critters Attack,
a few words about the attacks should be written, and be assured that those are
well-staged, in a ‘don’t show too much’ kind of thriller way, an approach that
was most likely taken due to budgetary reasons, but it works aesthetically in
spades (The attacks are also quite gory, resulting in the film’s
R-rating, whereas all the previous installments were rated PG-13). A Critters
film should also be about Small Town, America, and this is indeed the set-up
here too, and although it delivers exactly what we wanted as fans, I couldn’t
help but wonder how cool it would be to see our favorite monsters in a
metropolis one day. Hein de Vos’ cinematography is dark and very appropriate
with the film’s thriller tone. Plus, all your favorite gags are here and then
some. A winner that is highly recommended.
The rebirth of the franchise was announced by the SyFy Channel (whom it
sounds like that would be interested in making more installments, much to our
pleasure) in October 2018 and this first film started principal photography (in
secret, no less) on February 2019. A trailer was made available a couple of
months later, and the film itself was made available online on July 2019.
Apostle (2018) poster
Apostle (2018)
Set in 1905, this is about Thomas Richardson (Dan Stevens, mostly known
for his TV work) who lands on a secluded Welsh village, the habitants of which
have kidnapped his sister (Elen Rhys, also mostly known for her TV work) and
demand money for her return. The male lead soon discovers that the village’s
history is built upon superstition, religious dogmatism and fanaticism,
violence, corruption, hypocrisy, and what’s more, the prevailing cult may be
hiding some literal monsters as well.
Writer/director Gareth Evans (who also produced with Ed Talfan and Aram
Tertzakian) invested in atmosphere and as a result he managed to deliver a slow
burn masterpiece that becomes even greater when one considers the tricky aspect
that it is in fact a period piece. Premiering at the Fantastic Fest in
September 2018, it then quickly (approximately a month later) ended on Netflix,
where it can now be appreciated by everybody, as indeed it does.
Afterword
My views on censorship and religion are very similar. If your religion
does not allow you to do something, this is fine. If your religion does not
allow me to do something, then you can both fuck off. Same applies to
censorship of any kind. If you are offended by something you’re watching or you
simply think that you shouldn’t be watching it because it is inappropriate,
then this is fine. If you are offended because I watch something and you think
that I shouldn’t be watching it, then you can fuck off.
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