Search the Cinema Head Cheese Archives!

May 9, 2013

Movie Review: Serena: An Adult Fairytale (1979)

Directed by Fred J. Lincoln

Movie Review by Greg Goodsell

Serena’s life really stinks. As explained by Fairy Godmother China Leigh, as soon as her mother died, her wicked stepfather sold her into slavery at the local brothel. She spends her days scrubbing floors inches away from all sorts of explicit action engaged by young women, that if you watch them too closely, aren’t that pretty, and their skid row johns. Client Mr. Thomas (reliable old hand Jamie Gillis) is planning a big orgy for his friend, Prince Charles (ditto, Paul Thomas). Will Serena, or Cindy, or Cinderella, whatever – she’s referred to all three names during the film’s 68 minutes – break away to participate in the big orgy and win the heart of Prince Charles?

Once upon a time, a shot-on-film porno film carried the guarantee that already rock-bottom production values wouldn’t be ported over from the shot-on-video ones, of which this opus appeared while the industry was transitioning. No chance: Serena is beneath rock-bottom. Taking place entirely at a spacious Northern California beach house, this flick was obviously shot in a day, if that. Furthermore, unlike most fairy tale-inspired porno films, there are no attempts at costume, sets or chintzy special effects. The sole bit of costuming is a leather top hat sported by Gillis in his early scenes, which had obviously had been gathering dust in his closet since his “hippie days.” Serena offer none of the ambition found in say, 7 into Snowy or Through the Looking Glass. This quickie doesn’t even cheer up the proceedings with a Borscht Belt comedian in a kneejerk bunny suit! WAH! I want my money back.

Other than Serena, Gillis and Thomas, the film is padded out with fairly unattractive unknowns. The only real source of humor is China Leigh’s cue-card readings. Need we say it, she pops up at the end boffing some dark-haired stud to ask the audience, “Now wasn’t that a nice story?” You don’t want to hear the answer …

Offered on the Impulse DVD label, Synapse’s dirtier, skankier side, the DVD of Serena has absolutely NO extras, unless you count chapter stops. For adult movie historians only. 

Oops! Almost forget – Serena is directed by none other than Fred J. Lincoln, the same guy who played the dastardly Weasel in Wes Craven’s Last House on the Left (1972). Lincoln directed a buh-zillion hardcore porno titles and he passed away earlier this year at the age of 76. Rest in peace, friend --

No comments:

Post a Comment