Movie Review: The Horde (2009)

There have been many zombie movies in the last decade, and now there is even been a television show that features our brain eating friends. I've seen some of them, and they all start to have a similar tone. A virus is spread, and we slowly see the takeover happen as a few ragtag survivors fight to stay alive. This theme really goes back to the original Night of the Living Dead. This is where The Horde takes a different angle.

Buy The Horde [Blu-ray] or DVD

At an officer's funeral, a woman begs a mourner not to do what she knows he's going to do. He's a fellow cop, and he wants revenge. The same goes for a few others. She makes him promise that he'll bring them all back safe, which is just about the time you know that most of them won't.

TV on DVD Review: Ghost Hunters, Season 8, Part 1 (2012, Image)

...as a certain famed, wise and literary 15th/16th century sage once wrote, "...there are more things in Heaven and Earth, (Horatio), than are dreamt of, in your philosophy..." Eh (...with a shoulder shrug), I suppose that I'd subscribe to that...I'd buy that for a dollar. However, in doggedly engaging the twelve episodes, which make up the SyFy-sponsored "Ghost Hunters: Season 8, Part One" box set collection, I also seem to recall an equally certain...and well, at a specific moment, quite shaken...Dr. Lesh, from 1982's "Poltergeist", who candidly admitted, "...parapsychology isn't something you master in. There are no certificates of graduation, no license to practice. I am a professional psychologist who spends most of her time engaged in this ghostly hobby, which makes me, I suppose, the most irresponsible (sixty-one-year old woman) I know..." Least to say, BOTH convoluting relevations fervently rattled around in my head, while watching this slick, paranormal-themed, investigative reality cable series, which despite the wonderfully varied, eclectic, historical and picturesque locations ventured to, in the course of this series' episode set, the whole of this suggestively endeavorous production seemed more exploitively 'showboat', than 'show-me'...

Movie Review: Monster (One 7 Movies, 1953)

If you’re in the mood to expand your Mexican horror film viewing horizons look no further than Italian cult movie distributor One 7 Movies' latest, Monster. Mexico has brought us some cool horror flicks over the years with movies like The Brainiac, Curse of the Crying Woman and the awesome awfulness of Night of the Bloody Apes. Monster is an obscurity that has slipped through my paws over the years so it's nice to finally see it on any format.

Chano Ureta's Monster is essentially a different take on Frankenstein and Phantom of the Opera with a few tweaks here and there. We start off in what is essentially the Mexican answer to the Regal Beagle, where Nora, a young attractive reporter is meeting her boss to talk about the mysterious Dr. Ling. Nora really wants to interview Ling and find out just a little bit more about his "eccentricities". What she doesn't know of course is that he is a deformed/maniac/genius who's been hiding his hideous face over the years by using a scarf and various masks. The best way to describe Ling's features would be Rocky Dennis from Mask crossed with a mixture of character-actor Irwin Keyes.

Scream Factory Blu-ray Giveaway!!

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #98 - Podcatastrophe

Kevin and Jeff join Camm Harston from Raise your Spirits and Ryan Ford and Jacob O'Neal from From the Underground to record live at Phoenix Comicon.

They talk underground music, how Jacob and Ryan got started, favorite slasher movies, the movies they love that others hate and more. They also wonder where Camm went. Yeah.

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

You can always email us at cinemaheadcheese@yahoo.com or tweet us @CinHeadCheese.

Support Cinema Head Cheese and Abnormal Entertainment by clicking the links on our Sponsors page!

This episode is sponsored by the following:

Movie Review: The Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976, Blu-ray/DVD Combo Pack)

Review By: Rob Sibley

Scream! Factory is at it once again releasing a little seen gem of the 70's. To my knowledge "The Town That Dreaded Sundown" has never seen a DVD/Blu-ray release before. So toss out your second gen bootlegs boys & girls because this is the definitive release. Also it should be noted as a bonus, Scream Factory has included a second film in this set. Charles B. Pierce's "The Evictors", starring Jessica Harper (Suspiria), Michael Parks (From Dusk Till Dawn) & Vic Morrow (Bronx Warriors). So this review will focus on both films.

"The Town That Dreaded Sundown" is a highly effective and taut  docudrama. Based on true events, the film takes place in 1946 Texarkana. Everything is peaceful enough, until the quiet little town is shocked to it's core when a couple is viciously attacked. This couple had their little make out session interrupted by a large fellow with a sack over his head. Who rips out some of the cars electrical wires out and then drags the boyfriend out of the passenger side window. As he attacks the young women we cut to the following morning. Deputy Norman Ramsey (Andrew Pine) is driving along a stretch a road and finds the young women, bloody, beaten and unconscious on the side of the road. The police aren't able to obtain any relevant information from the shocked couple. They put out a warning to all the towns folk but that doesn't stop another young couple from heading out to a deserted stretch of road for a bit of romance. At this time Ramsey is driving by and hears gunshots only to find the boyfriend dead and the girlfriend tied to a tree with a bullet lodged in her and bite marks on her back.

Cinema Head Cheese Visits Amy's Baking Company!

Reviewed By: Mike Heenan

If you're reading this, chances are you've already seen the Kitchen Nightmares episode featuring Amy's Baking Company.  After their Facebook meltdown, the owners closed up shop for a week and hired a PR firm to rebuild their reputation.  The PR firm put out a notice on Facebook for reservations to their re opening, and I was one of the lucky ones to get in on opening night.  Allegedly, they had over 1000 reservations, so they decided to span the re opening the entire week.

My reservation was for 8:30pm, but I live near by the restaurant, so I decided to drop by early at 7pm to see if there was any drama going on outside.  There were about 20 people lingering around, and several trying to get in the place, but they were turning away anyone who didn't have a reservation.  I went up to check my status and saw there were empty tables inside, and the girl said I could go in at that point or I could wait until 8:30pm.  I decided to go in and was promptly seated at the back.  Samy was working the tables, and I noticed about four wait staff as well.

Movie Review: Sleazy 70s Stags

Review by Jeff

Since my younger days as a miniature perve, one of my absolute favorite things to witness in a film (be it, XXX, X, R or PG) was God’s greatest invention, the bare breast. I thought it would be most helpful to start out this review of After Hours Cinema’s exhaustive titty loop compilation, Sleazy 70s Stags, with a proper definition of our jiggly pals: Breast - “The breast refers to the front of the chest or, more specifically, to the mammary gland. The mammary gland is a milk producing gland. It is composed largely of fat. Within the mammary gland is a complex network of branching ducts. These ducts exit from sac-like structures called lobules, which can produce milk in females. The ducts exit the breast at the nipple.” Ok, the “milk talk” is a little bit of a turn-off, so why don’t I just give you guys my definition of the breast: Boner-inducing mounds of loveliness.

Movie Review: Dead End Drive-In (1986)

Directed by Brian Trenchard-Smith

Review by Greg Goodsell

In the far-flung future Australia of 1995, things have taken a turn for the worse. A series of global catastrophes has rendered the world effectively bankrupt, and law and order is strictly on a limited basis. Taking his girlfriend Carmen (Natalie McCurry) to the Star Drive-In for a quick one, unemployed lay-about “Crabs” (Ned Manning) has his lovemaking rudely interrupted when armed policemen steal two wheels from his ’56 Chevy. The next morning, the true purpose of the Star Drive-In is revealed to him; it is a concentration camp for undesirables, chiefly the young and jobless. In exchange, the inmates are allowed all the junk food they can eat and a steady stream of no-budget action pictures screened nightly. Making friends with their fellow inmates, Crabs and his girlfriend discover that everyone there has more or less accepted their fate. Things get sketchier still when the drive-in is given a sudden influx of Asian inmates. In response, the white Australians band together -- NOT to confront their captors, but to discriminate and harass the minorities. Confronting the kindly, if insidious drive-in manager (Peter Whitford), Crabs vows to escape from the dismal drive-in – or die trying.  

Director Brian Trenchard-Smith one-upped the likes of Quentin Tarrantino with this ironic, self-reflexive film, which has yet to be equaled – low-budget action car crash movies are part of a greater social malaise, this message being tucked neatly into a low-budget action car crash movie! Dead End Drive-In looks great, with artfully composed shots of a dirty, dystopian backdrop comprised of spray-painted junked cars and wild colored lighting. The drive-in’s denizens are a smash-up of the then current punk rock hairstyles and fashions, coupled with Mad Max-inspired remnant attire. 

Movie Review: State of Emergency (2011, Image)

...ya' know?? Being a devoted fan of the 'zombie' movie genre, as well-worn and beaten-to-'undeadth' as the genre is, this viewer cannot help but feel compelled to wade through every potential 'hit & miss' zombie flick out there, with hopes of catching those few and far between 'hits', among the sea of 'misses'...and I have to readily admit, at first glance of the DVD cover art for 2011's "State of Emergency", I had genuine hopes for a kick-ass horror film, considering the armed and haggard look at the supposed 'hero' on the cover...atop an overturned vehicle...aiming sharply at a ravagingly overwhelming barrage of the living dead, surrounding him. I mean, really...the guy LOOKED just like martial arts star Don 'The Dragon' Wilson, and anyone who has seen Don's movies, which were prevalent, over the past 30 some odd years, you know that there's no lack of kick-ass action in HIS films. Well...uh, no...regrettfully, after having partaken of the film, I can now say...uh no, it WASN'T Don, as the character on the cover...and although this guy would probably kick some serious butt in any other zombie flick...in THIS one, well...the flesh-eating horrors are so minimal, the hapless guy on the cover of the DVD, seems almost displaced in this flick. But then, I'm getting ahead of myself, ain't I??...

Movie Review: Pornographi (1971)

So far Pink Flamingo Entertainment in their short life as vintage filth purveyors have consistently shown a knack for giving some quality treatment to Golden Age classics that include their acclaimed “The Shaun Costello Collection”. Now the Danish company has brought a European adult film classic, Ole Ege’s Pornagraphi.

Comprised of ten short films, including such silent Ole Ege gems as: The Dream Girl (1966), Harem, Spanking (1970), The Pornmodel Ilse (1969), The American Girl (1970) and The Jolly Shave (1964), Crazy Strip (1966), Three Lively Girls (1964), Group Sex (1969), Springtime in Tivoli (1969). All the shorts were shot when porn was illegal so there’s an added naughtiness to the proceedings. One thing that’s constant about Ege’s short-films is that none are at all completely tasteless and it’s apparent with his craftsmanship that Ege’s as much an artist as he is a pornographer. Yes, we are talking porn here.

Movie Review: OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies (2006)

Swaggerdly suave, handsome & worldly...dashing, dapper and debonair...always dressed to kill, a picture of cool & crisp intrigue...fast, cars, fast money, fast wit...well-armed & well aimed...deftly skilled at hand-to-hand combat...a resourceful, finely-honed ability at surveillance, concealment & infiltration...the dogged bane of world-wide villainy...the most nefarious of men, want him dead...the most nefarious of women merely WANT him. THIS guy?? Uh, he's NOT James Bond, folks, and he most assuredly DOESN'T have a clue. He's agent OSS 117, Hubert Bonniseur de la Bath, though the name of the game remains the same...spies, naked thighs and bad guys, albeit in a much more comical meld, with this rollicking and hilarious send-up to classic '50's & '60's spy movies...the 2006 French comedy, "OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies"...a nostalgic precursor bit of cinema, from director Michael Hazanavicius, the Academy Award winning filmmaker of 2011's critically acclaimed and equally nostalgic jewel, "The Artist."

Movie Review: Dark Dealer (1995)

I do love a good anthology movie. Granted, this movie isn't really all that good but let's call it good enough.

Dark Dealer came out in 1995 but it has a 1980s vibe that makes it more fun campy than pretentious campy. The movie begins with the end of the wrap around story. Ray is being chased through some office building by a giant plasma globe. He escapes by entering the back room of an office. Instead of what he would expect to be an empty room, three men sit at a round table. Seems Ray has just joined in a game of Black Jack with the souls of two dead men and a demon dealer. Because yeah, why not?

Ray is told he did not survive the encounter with that giant electric ball and by joining the game, if he wins, he could win back his soul and be alive again. But since he just got there, he goes last.
The first man plays and with each deal, we flash back to the events in his life that brought him to the devil's game.

"Cellar Space" is the first man's story. He's a petty thug who's crimes are witnessed by a lone elderly gentleman who lives basically in a cellar. When the thug and his enforcer break into the man's home, to hide from the cops for a recent murder and apparently to eat all the man's food, they discover the old man is not an easy mark and will not be bullied into silence or cooperation. In fact, the thug and his enforcer would have been much safer with the police.

The second story is "Blues in the Night". Sam Burke is a brilliant blues musician but dies before he can become a big star. 30 years later, Phil Barton comes across a taped recording of Sam's music and decides to sell it as his own. Phil is a lawyer for a handful of decent albeit spoiled rock musicians but he wants to write his own music. The talent to do so is non existent so with Sam's genius hidden behind Phil's name, he scores big time. Sam is none too happy with that plan and returns from the grave to exact royalty payments out of Phil's hide.

Movie Review: Nicholas and Alexandra (Blu-ray)

Review by Greg Goodsell

Directed by Franklin J. Schaffner

At the turn of the 20th century, the Russian Czars were as criminally out of touch with their people as the French Aristocracy was in the 18th century before the advent of the guillotine. The unprepared and naïve Nicholas II (Michael Jayston) along with his German-born wife Alexandra (Janet Suzman) are young, in love and responsible for the deaths of countless millions of Russians, due to unsuccessful wars fought abroad and the ruthless exploitation of the working class. Finally producing a male heir after producing four very spoiled princesses, they learn that the heir apparent, thanks to generations of inbreeding, is a hemophiliac. Rising to the challenge of being both spiritual adviser and miracle worker to their ailing son is Mad Monk Rasputin (played by the fourth Doctor Who, Tom Baker, in a bravura performance), a most unholy holy man who outdoes the televangelists of today with his rampant alcoholism and womanizing. With the advent of World War I, things for the Romanov Royal Family begin to unravel quickly. Besting Germany only by the size of its – mostly unarmed army, millions of Russian troops begin to die on the battlefield due to being allotted only three bullets a day. The Bolsheviks, comprised of idealists such as Lenin and even far worse despots such as Stalin, begin their revolution. Rasputin is killed, and there is growing international pressure on Nicholas to abdicate. After doing so reluctantly, he and his wife, son, daughters and loyal household help hurtle inexorably to their appointment with a firing squad …

Movie Review: The Burning (1981, Blu-ray/DVD Combo Pack)

Review By: Rob Sibley

1981 was a monumental year for horror films and in my opinion. 81 saw the release of some of the best of the genre. Evil Dead was finally hitting theaters, American Werewolf in London was turning heads with it's ground breaking special FX and hybrid of horror and comedy. Jason Vorhees was rising up from the grave... well water for Friday the 13^th part II and Barbara Hershey was dealing with one rapey ghost in The Entity. Horror fans had a lot of films and it's various sub-genres to sink their teeth into in 81. But the biggest of all the sub-genres had to be the slasher film, some say Carpenter's Halloween started it, others say Black Christmas or Friday the 13th. I'm not going to involve myself in that discussion. But I will say without a doubt in my mind, Mario Bava's 1971 Italian classic “A Bay of Blood” got the ball rolling. Boy o boy that ball sure rolling in the 80's, it seems like every week a new slasher picture was hitting the multiplexes. Dousing the screen with enough blood & T&A to keep any warm blooded young man happy.

So many slasher films were produced back then that we still are discovering some of them to this day. Let me go back to 1981 for a minute, for the slasher film the year saw two huge sequels. Halloween II & Friday the 13^th part II. It also saw the release of such gems as Jeff Leibermans Just Before Dawn, Joe Zito's The Prowler, Tobe Hooper's The Fun House, My Bloody Valentine and many many more. Of coarse with such a large amount of films of the same ilk being released some of those are bound to sadly go a tad unnoticed. One of those films was the slasher classic “The Burning”. Featuring FX work by Tom Savini (Who famously turned down Friday 2 to work on this one) and stylish direction by Tony Maylam makes this one a cut above the rest.

The Playground of the Mind: An Overview of Shaun Costello's HOT DREAMS

Reviewed By: Heather Drain

Movies have been one of the strongest forms of escapism since the days of the beautiful, ghost like image of famed belly dancer Little Sheba tantalizing/horrifying curious viewers on a Nickelodeon. Art is the safest way to explore facets about your own humanity and all of its murky little corners. With this, it only make sense for numerous directors working in the 70's and 80's to incorporate themes of adult fantasies in film. This concept is front and center in Warren Evans aka Shaun Costello's 1983 film, HOT DREAMS.

Lisa (the great Sharon Mitchell) seemingly has it all. She's beautiful, lives in a nice and roomy loft in New York City and is a successful beefcake photographer. The problem? She's married to a total schmoe, in the form her of her businessman husband, Bob (Michael Bruce). The film opens with the two in bed, all lovingly framed and lit, including some nice, tight composition. Soon, Bob starts rubbing her side, initiating what I like to call “the international sign of your partner waking you to get nookie” maneouver.) She's very receptive but just as things start getting good for Lisa, Bob finishes without making things equal. Even worse, his neglect is excused with him saying he has to get ready for work but then takes, like, 15 minutes to shave his non-facial hair. What?

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #97 - Motor City Comic Con 2013

Dave gives his report on his adventures at Motor City Comic Con in Detroit.

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

You can always email us at cinemaheadcheese@yahoo.com or tweet us @CinHeadCheese.

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Movie Review: Love Me (2012, Anchor Bay)

(...referring to the characters in this movie) People!! Get out of the darkness...get out, and get some sun, PLEASE!!! Granted, this viewer hasn't been regularly privy to youthful, school-entrenched teen movies, since the colorful, albeit angst-filled days of the '80's; however, at least things were relatively bright & vividly lit back then, and the ones that favored the dark motif...dark clothes, dark rooms, dark attitudes...were relegatedly monikered the outcasts, the misfits. Perhaps it's merely the matter of this viewer having gotten way too old, but if actual teen life today is anything close to being as style-reflective, as in the derivitively slick and quaint little 2012 mystery/thriller, "Love Me", then I suppose that the younger generation these days has, for the most part, expressively and outwardly embraced the darkness within themselves, and what was once considered 'outcast' and 'misfit', is now the standard.

That been said, shall we shift gears, and examine an unchanging constant, no matter what generation is focused upon...an unswervingly steadfast constant, being that of 'true love'?? Ah, yes...true love. Two people finding that certain perfect chemistry...that certain, instinctive, unexplainable, plus-to-minus attraction, which inexplicably and compellingly carries them off to an indescribably intangible level, that's indelibly euphoric, when it happens...or rather, when it is resignedly let to happen. Life's classic unsolveable riddle, wrapped in a mystery, shrouded in enigma. And yet, tortuously conflicting and repellant, yet strangely and irresistibly alluring, when an element of mystery...of darkness...nay, even of danger, is introduced. In the case of "Love Me", we're talking deeply entrenched shades of deception...and murder...

Movie Review: The Vampire Lovers (Blu-ray, 1970)

The legendary Hammer Studios output is finally starting see some very well deserved life on glorious Blu-ray. Scream Factory has made a splash with several Blu-ray releases of some of the best of 80's slashers (Halloween II, Funhouse, Terror Train), and now have taken a stab at releasing one of the finer Hammer vampire films in Roy Ward Baker's The Vampire Lovers. This release of course is a filled to the brim HD special edition.

Based on J. Sheridan Le Fanu's Carmilla, The Vampire Lovers is the story about a family living in the English countryside who has taken upon themselves to invite a gorgeous stranger into their home by the name of Carmilla (Ingrid Pitt, Countess Dracula, and The Wicker Man). This lovely stranger isn't exactly the best guest you’d want to be around other nubile women, when in fact this buxom siren is actually a vampire, thirsting for their blood. Of course no great vampire film coming out of Hammer Studios is complete without the always professional, Peter Cushing (Twins of Evil, Dracula: Prince of Darkness). Cushing is hot on the tail of Carmilla, who even for this seasoned vampire hunter proves to be a tough catch.

Movie Review: Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)

Review by John Beutler

...the best and most synergenic thing about a great movie's cast ensemble, in unique cases when such a cast is called upon to respectfully emulate and reinterpret past beloved characters...now considered having legendary status...and once performed by actors equally legendary and seasoned, is when fresh newcomer performers genuinely take these classic characters, make them their own, and at the same time...through great chemistry and interaction...further exhue character qualities, which we the audience, can identify with. Indeed, most of us viewers can easily and most readily identify with most, if not all of the original 'Star Trek' characters, and see qualities in each singular character, or any combination of said characters, which deep down, we all naturally possess, have incorporated into ourselves, or even aspired to. Kirk's keenly instinctive, albeit reckless & unconventional ability to unflinchingly take on challenges, exhuing a measure of authoritative disregard, and yet, still relatively & courageously saving the day, nearly each and every time. Spock's staunch insistence upon a logical approach to matters, despite interference of his internal conflict of heritage, between his emotion-laden human side, and his mentally disciplined Vulcan half. Scotty's unbounding sense of resourcefulness, and his unswerving ability to get the job done, no matter what he needs to do. Uhura's indomitable passions for her position...crystal clear upon what she knows she is capable of doing, and knowing an unquestionable equality, in working with her shipmates. McCoy's own sense of determined self-righteousness and empathy for his fellow man, as well as his shipmates, despite a constant measure of situational doubt and ability, when the odds on such situations, in his eyes, seem too great. Chekov's unseasoned, albeit determined sense of trying to measuring up...clearly having the skills he needs, to get in there and get it done...but possessing a sense of non-dissuading self-doubt, being one of the junior members of the crew...self-doubt, which would later understandably dissipate, given further opportunity to prove himself. Sulu's disciplined passion for the combat...being very assured of himself, and of his abilities...even on the occasions, which he is given the leadership role. We see these qualities in each and every one of us...can relate to them, in one way or another...and it is primarily the result of this very observation, as reflect herein...the inception & embraceably further development of these now-classic characters, and the new challenge they face...where the newly released "Star Trek Into Darkness" works best, and most assuredly proves that the re-envisioned, well-written and well-received 2009 attempt at the franchise, was no fluke...

Movie Review: Escapee (2012, Blu-ray)

Directed by Campion Murphy

Movie Review by Greg Goodsell

There is a very real possibility that there may be regular visitors to this Web site who have never seen a horror film. Rising to the occasion is Escapee, a horror film that by intent and design is not that scary for those who may purchase or rent the DVD or Blu-Ray with its foreboding and ominous graphics (“Evil Has Been Unleashed”) that it won't be too upsetting for their fragile sensibilities.

While on a an observational trip to a high security prison for the criminally insane – in this case, a gaggle of young, obnoxious girls forever on their cell phones on who's zoomin' who – psychology student Abby Jones (Christine Evangelista) has an unpleasant encounter with serial killer – they CALL HIM a serial killer in the press materials, but we only see him kill one person, his girlfriend, off-screen in the film's prologue, Harmon Porter (Dominic Purcell). Emerging none the worse for wear, Abby retires home to study with two gal pals. It's a dark and stormy night, the power comes on and off, Harmon escapes from the sanitarium and starts to pick off the tiny cast – all of it sounding more interesting than it is.

See David Hayes at Motor City Comic Con 2013!

Join Dave and the fine folks of the Great Lakes Association of Horror Writers at the Motor City Comic Con! Debuting here will be the Alter Egos anthology from Source Point Press and Rottentail!

The Con runs from May 17-19. Tickets and info can be found at http://www.motorcitycomiccon.com.

Movie Review: Code Of Honor (2013, Digital Playground)

Reviewed by John Beutler

Often, over the years, in peering behind the green door, so to speak, at the countless barrage of 'copycat' offerings that make up a good part of 'cinema de erotica'...specifically, those based upon...uh, well...let's face it, folks...outright copied from higher profile concept films, or the latest motion picture blockbusters, one might haplessly fall victim to a good number of such, which...despite the incorporative melding of expected eroticism and sexual spice...just don't seem to work, conceptually. However, on occasion, a cleverly conceived and downright erotically sexy coupling of high-concept-inspired, blatantly over-the-lines traced, rendering of such attributed adult entertainment DOES shimmer through; such is the case, with the (...conventional, and...well, not so conventional) blazing guns of 2013's outrageous 'search and rescue' sex epic, "Code of Honor"...

A French drug-dealing moll, Manuel, is living the high life, amidst a coastal cottage, replent with big guns, a mountain of cash, and a poolside bevy of buxom beautiful babes. After a smoking hot, heated bedroom tussle with two of the gals, Manuel is abruptly besieged by two armed, albeit bikini-clad, undercover agents, masquerading as part of his sexy poolside entourage. Out of desperation, and with guns-a'blazin', Manuel blasts his way out of the cottage, and makes a fast getaway, taking one of the beautiful undercover operatives with him as hostage, and leaving the other...the leader of this covert mission...holding the bag, to explain to her superior, why the operation went sour...

The Vampress Luxura Returns to Print!

Vampress Luxura Returns to Publication via Kickstarter.

Fayetteville, NC – Veteran comic artist & writer Kirk Lindo has launched a Kickstarter campaign to publish the first chapter of his all new Vampress Luxura Graphic Novel.

Luxura was the star of Lindo's highly successful Vamperotica anthology comic series which was published in the mid 1990's and ran for 50 issues. An impressive feet for a small company having to fight for space on comic shelves with the big publishers.

This all new graphic novel is a globe spanning adventure that follows The Vampress Luxura as she meticulously orchestrates a plan to control the outcome of an impending Apocalypse. Will the Ultimate Vampire Queen save the world or just save herself!

More information is available directly on the Kickstarter page.

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/kirklindo/the-vampress-luxura-kickstart-the-apocalypse

To learn more about this project contact: kirklindo@vampressluxura.com

Movie Review: Muay Thai Warrior (2011, Blu-ray)

Review By: Rob Sibley

Do you dig Muay Thai boxing? How about ninjas and some right on the money Samurai action? How about all of that tossed into one film? If so, this little Thai mini-epic might just be the tasty little morsel you've been looking for. Let me backtrack a bit, I've always been a sucker for any film featuring Muay Thai fighting. Muay Thai fight films really became popular on American shores when Tony Jaa burst onto the scene with Ong-bak in 2003. Since then Muay Thai films having been popping up left, right and center. The best of the bunch have starred Jaa and usually were directed by Prachya Pinkaew. Who is arguably the most talented action director in Thailand.

Jaa wasn't alone though, equally talented but sadly nowhere near as famous is Dan Chupong. Who stared in two equally impressive films Born to Fight and the bat-shit crazy Thai-Western Dynamite Warrior. I would also be doing Thai action cinema a disservice if I didn't bring up Panna Rittikrai. The man is responsible for discovering Chupong and Jaa along with directing Ong-Bak 2 & 3. While were talking Thai action stars JeeJa Yanin jumped onto the scene and showed fighting wasn't only for dudes. Her impressive skills were showcased in her debut “Chocolate” (Directed by Pinkaew) and “Raging Phoenix”. Her latest flick is going to be co-starring role in Tony Jaa's The Protector 2 which also interestingly enough is going to feature Dan Chupong as well.

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #96 - Lorre's Peter

Dave, Jeff and Kevin are all together this week to discuss the upcoming Man of Steel, a wrestling documentary, some Blue Cheese, a great found footage movie, Peter Lorre, Sean Connery, George Romero, dogs with fecal fetishes and more.

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

You can always email us at cinemaheadcheese@yahoo.com or tweet us @CinHeadCheese.

Support Cinema Head Cheese and Abnormal Entertainment by clicking the links on our Sponsors page!

This episode is sponsored by the following:

Movie Review: Same Time Every Year (1981, DVD)

Review By: Rob Sibley

How about that, when I finished watching this 80's porn flick I was surprised to find out that Fred J. Lincoln was the director. If the name sounds a bit familiar it's because the man played "Weasel" in Wes Craven's (Classic?) Last House on the left. Sadly Fred passed away earlier this year (R.I.P. bro). But looking further into Lincolns resume this flick wasn't a one off. He actually made quite the career directing adult features. He's actually made over 300 of them, that has to be some kind of record right?  Also a quick note, I think that gal on the cover of the DVD...she's not in the film, she's actually modern day porn actress (retired? Come on they never stay retired... just sayin') Temptress. 

You gotta admit a fan or not, vintage porn is pretty damn charming. Could be the nostalgia factor, the copious amounts of bush, bad acting, worse music and story lines that were more likely then not written on a cocktail napkin. Some retro flicks of this ilk shot their wad a bit further with intentions of artistic grandeur.  Radley Metzger was one of those filmmakers who'd actually deliver a solid film even if you removed the sex. This film though? Nah, it's not art house in the least. But so-what? Most people don't pop on retro-erotica for the thrilling story-lines. 

Movie Review: Onna Harakiri Sakuhinshu (1990)

Written by Yuuri Sunohara

Starring Yuuri Sunohara

This was my first personal foray into the seedy underbelly of Japanese fetish cinema, aside from a vomit-fetish porn I stumbled across while looking for Harry Potter books online once. And I must confess, before viewing it I had no idea there was a whole and distinct sub-genre of horror dealing exclusively with ritualistic suicide, otherwise known as Harakiri. Just another reason why I love Japanese cinema, those crazy bastards just have no boundaries when it comes to inappropriate shit. I'll simply refer to it as “art house snuff”, that has a nice ring to it and gives it an air of integrity.

Cinema Head Cheese returns to Phoenix Comicon!

Abnormal Entertainment will be scattered throughout Phoenix Comicon this year recording live podcasts. Come out and see your favorite podcasts in a series of mash-up shows. Check out the schedule below, and come out to see us! Click the image for tickets and info.

- Thursday, May 23 in Room 228A from 10:30p to 11:30p: Put It Together, Myriads of Thought and Talk Zebra get together for a live podcast.

- Friday, May 24 in Room 232A from 7:30p to 8:30p: Bank On Action and Unprotected Sports talk all avenues of sports entertainment in a live podcast.

- Friday, May 24 in Room 232A from 8:30p to 9:30p: Raise Your Spirits, From The Underground and Cinema Head Cheese combine for a live podcast.

- Saturday, May 25 in Room 228A from 10:30p to 11:30p: Brian and Jacob from The Gorram Nerd Hour will screen their short comedic horror film Lepus and host a panel with the cast and crew. The film features Taylor Made and Masked Blogster from Bank On Action.

- Sunday, May 26 in Room 228A from 4:00p to 5:00p: Cinema Head Cheese, The Gorram Nerd Hour and The Atomic Fallout Society give a Phoenix Comicon wrap-up in live podcast form.

Movie Review: Back Woods (2001)

Tony Masiello, of B-Movie Dumpster.com fame and director of the new documentary SOV: The True Independents, poops on Back Woods in the most hilarious video review of all time. Watch it in all its glory and then check out the two minute version of the film right below it.

Back Woods was written by and starred Cinema Head Cheese co-founder David C. Hayes many, many years ago and he just can't escape its enormous shadow.

WARNING: The review contains some foul language but what else can you expect. The poor guy just watched Back Woods!

Movie Review: The Song of Bernadette (Blu-ray, Twilight Time)

One really has to hand it to the early 1940's writers and filmmakers of 1943's "The Song of Bernadette", for conceiving of such a beautifully rendered and emotionally moving story, and yet, also making the film's complex and assortedly interwoven proceedings...based upon actual events, occurring and dating back to the mid-1850's France...so daring and intriguingly thought-provoking, in unveiling and expounding upon the political & religious hypocrisy and mediocrity, as evident for this specific time in history. In doing this, the film suggestively questions the concept of faith, and yet deftly turns around, and irrevocably affirms such faith, with an objectively compelling, heart and soul-affecting tale of dramatic intrigue, challenging the purest of innocence, faith and truth...with the scourges of stubborn & misguided doubt, suppression, jealousy and envy...and engaging the more tangled and provocative arenas of both religion and politics...

Bernadette Soubirous...a frail, naive and simple-minded young girl, living with her struggling and impoverished family, in the mid-18th century Lourdes, France...accompanies her sister and a friend on an errand, just outside of town. On the way, she succumbs to fatigue, as the result of an asthmatic attack, lags behind, and stops to rest, while her sister continues onward, across a small ravine, in order to collect firewood. While resting near a small alcove, near the ravine, Bernadette is drawn toward the alcove by a mysterious, albeit comforting breeze, followed by an inexplicable vision on a rock-like alter...a vision of absolute wonder and beauty, in the form of a woman, dressed in robes, enshrouded by a heavenly light, and holding a rosary in her hand. Overwhelmed by the vision, which in her mind, is merely & simply as she sees it...and nothing more, Bernadette faints before the alter. When her sister finds her and revives her, Bernadette dazingly relates the wondrous sight she has witnessed, and pleads with her sister to promise not to say anything of the incident, to anyone...

Movie Review: The Frankenstein Theory (2013)

Something horror films seem to be missing lately is the slow burn. Sometimes we see brutality within the first minute. That's okay, but not when it happens in every horror movie. It's nice to see a calculated build of intensity in a movie, and The Frankenstein Theory does a great job with that. It doesn't hit you in the face with anything. It lets the story and characters breathe in a fairly realistic scenario.

We start with a documentary crew on Jonathan Venkenhein (Kris Lemche), a college professor with an interesting theory. I know what you're thinking. Yes, it's another found footage movie, but give it a chance. I haven't been impressed with many in this genre either, but this fits perfectly in the vein of Troll Hunter. Anyway, Venkenhein theorizes that the letters in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein are actual letters that were used as the base for her fictitious novel. In other words, the Frankenstein monster is real, and was created in part by one of Venkenhein's ancestors. His intent is to take a documentary crew to Canada to capture the creature on film.

Movie Review: The Suckers / The Love Garden

Vinegar Syndrome put out a slew of cool titles to cater to admirers of the wild, sexy and wacky in cult film obscurities With three excellent Blu-ray releases of The Lost Films of Herschel Gordon Lewis, The Massage Parlor Murders and The Telephone Book the exploitation specialists have also unleashed a line of Drive-In style fare, affordably priced at under 15 bucks showcasing some more rarities.Arthur Byrd's The Suckers and The Love Garden are just one of those releases that are sure to put a smile on fans of sexploitation.

If you like it sleazy, you are going to dig the first film, The Suckers. Based on The Most Dangerous Game, this soft-core action flick pits a group of young models and their middle-aged boyfriends (sporting some amazing comb-overs) pitted against a vicious hunter and his murderous rape-happy goons. The Suckers isn’t too explicit but it sure is damn uncomfortable in spots. One scene in particular during the “big chase”, a woman is kidnapped and raped on a bed. Rape is hard enough to watch, but the way its shot almost makes it seem like it’s supposed to titillate. There are some unintentional laughs added to the craziness making this title enjoyable.  Only in the sleazy 70’s!

Movie Review: Serena: An Adult Fairytale (1979)

Directed by Fred J. Lincoln

Movie Review by Greg Goodsell

Serena’s life really stinks. As explained by Fairy Godmother China Leigh, as soon as her mother died, her wicked stepfather sold her into slavery at the local brothel. She spends her days scrubbing floors inches away from all sorts of explicit action engaged by young women, that if you watch them too closely, aren’t that pretty, and their skid row johns. Client Mr. Thomas (reliable old hand Jamie Gillis) is planning a big orgy for his friend, Prince Charles (ditto, Paul Thomas). Will Serena, or Cindy, or Cinderella, whatever – she’s referred to all three names during the film’s 68 minutes – break away to participate in the big orgy and win the heart of Prince Charles?

Movie Review: Baron Blood (1972, aka Gli orrori del castello di Norimberga)

Directed by Mario Bava

Movie Review by Greg Goodsell

Well-heeled, if vapid American college student Peter Kleist (Antonio Cantafore) flies to Vienna, Austria to take a break from his college studies and to look up his family's history. He's there to research his great-grandfather, Baron Otto Von Kleist, known in hushed whispers as “Baron Blood.” It seems that his great grandpa was a wealthy, sadistic SOB who tortured and killed the surrounding villagers at his castle, before a witch placed a curse on him and he was set on fire by the local peons. Meeting with Herr Dortmund (Dieter Tressler) the entrepreneur responsible for the current hotel project, Peter becomes smitten with Dortmundt's beautiful assistant Eva (fetching Frau Elke Sommer, capering about in micro-miniskirts and plunging necklines). During the course of a slow evening, Peter and Eva hightail it to the castle to read an ancient parchment intended to bring the notorious Baron back to life. They do so, and the Baron comes back to life and starts killing people anew. Now, how will they set things right after playing their ill-advised party game?

Re-watching this film so soon after the death of director Jesus Franco, who died last month at the age of 82, I was reminded how Mario Bava was one of the few directors who could get away with a zoom lens. A most hated camera move, as it cannot replicate the human eye, Bava was zoom-happy at this stage of his career. He did it so well, however, we could forgive him for its overuse. Bava always took great care to properly light and focus a scene, and so his zooms, always smoothly executed, were never intrusive. Quite unlike Franco, whose camera was frequently out of focus, indifferently lit and ragged. Those who think all of his films are worthy of study escape my comprehension. This reviewer hopes he hasn't stepped on any toes!

Movie Review: Sloppy the Psychotic (2012)

Send in the clowns...unless he's a recovering alcoholic who, once he falls off the wagon, goes on a killing spree that would make Jack the Ripper say WTF, bro?

Sloppy the Clown is Mike, a down on his luck guy who lives with his folks. The "Clean and Sober" signs everywhere indicate that because of a drinking problem, Mike has hit a bit of a rough patch while chasing his dreams. Fortunately, he does have the job he's always wanted: a performing clown. Much to his father's chagrin, Mike is very good at his job. That is until he man-handles a young child while she draws a picture that basically says clowns suck.

Of course, Mike is fired and when he arrives home, he leaps off the wagon and drowns his sorrows in what looks like peppermint schnapps. When he wakes up the next morning, there's a dead chick in bed with him. Slowly his memory returns, assaulting him with visions of rough sex and murder. So...drinking not only makes him an asshole but releases a psychotic rage. But a little dead-girl-in-mah-bed won't stop him from posting freelance clown for hire signs all over town.

Movie Review: Heaven's Touch (1983)

It seems lately here at the Blue Cheese we've covered numerous titles directed by smut pioneer, Shaun Costello. Just from watching movies like Forced Entry, More Than Sisters and The Passions Of Carol, I've seen an attention to narrative that I’m not quite use to when viewing older fuck films. The hardcore sex is a given, but that’s not really what makes a these films in particular unique. With today’s review,Costello puts forth some divine intervention with the comedy, Heavens Touch. It’s essentially a goofy light-hearted comedy that borrows much from Hollywood film Heaven’s Gate. And get this, Heaven's Touch is actually much more entertaining than Heaven’s Gate.

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #95 - Moore Fokken Harryhausen

The guys take on solo segments this week. First, Kevin talks about seeing David Spade do stand-up, three very different movies that he watched (including a documentary about twin senior prostitutes) and Slayer guitarist Jeff Hanneman.

Dave digs into comic books from Alan Moore and the movies spawned from them. He also looks at the Watchmen prequel series.

Jeff jumps on to remember effects wizard Ray Harryhausen and review a couple of fun movies from the 1980s.

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

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Movie Review: The Experiment (2012)

Apparently being British does NOT automatically add an air of sophistication to any project. Their low budget horror is just as shitty as ours (mostly) is.

The Experiment is about a shady organization that is conducting some kind of experiment on the unsuspecting public. Through vague newspaper ads, this company lures in folks desperate for money. The only way they get paid is to take a drug that's designed to heighten female sexuality. Okay so maybe the ads are specific in their demographic but not much else. The company is only interested in finding the 'right' candidate.

Cue our main character (whose name I've forgotten because, honestly, I don't give a shit) who has just lost her job as an exotic dancer. For some reason her husband goes to her work to watch her dance and then gets jealous when men pay any attention to her. Huh? After a huge fight, of his accusations and she accusing him of not turning away the attentions of another dancer, she's fired. And a new divorcee.

Movie Review: Dragon (2011)

Review by John Beutler

...early forensic science encounters martial arts mysticism, in this enthralling and action-packed period set piece, called "Dragon", from 2011. A compellingly thought-provoking storyline...an extraordinary depth in characters across the spectrum...a lush & rustic setting and locale, almost a character unto itself...and extraordinary performances, make this intriguingly complex and inner-woven martial arts mystery, an absolute delight to visually bear witness to. Martial arts action superstar Donnie Yen, having proved himself quite the prolific actor, over the past couple decades (..."IP Man", "14 Blades", "Hero", "Killzone", "Legend of the Fist: The Return of Chen Zhen", amongst numerous others), continues to amaze and intrigue here, in his dynamic martial arts ability, coupled with an equally adept and compelling flair for drama, in a captivating tale of mystery, dark secrets and hidden agendas...

Movie Review: H.P. Lovecraft's The Dark Sleep (2012, DVD)

Review By: Rob Sibley

Nancy Peterson (Ashley Galloway) is an author who has just just gone through a nasty divorce. She needs some place secluded to work on her next book so what's a gal to do? Well lucky for Ms. Peterson her ex-husband Pete (Steve Diasparra) is a real estate agent. She convinces him to give her the house for free! Only catch is in the basement there is an odd pentagram that has a sinister look to it. Just paint over it you say? Well she can't, because apparently it's in the contract that the pentagram has to stay untouched. Don't worry she does paint over it (with little effect). During the first night of staying at her free pad she has some horrible nightmares and sees a giant rat (a charming rod puppet). The next day she has two exterminators over (One of them even looks like Super Mario) they are supposed to provide some comic relief but sadly the humor falls flat. I was just waiting for Mario to say “That's a spicy meatball!” sadly that didn't happen.

Movie Review: Mud (2013)

Review by John Beutler

...oh, the cherished memories of pre-teen summers' past...the freedom...the adventure...the self-discovery...the sense of reckless curiosity...riding that fine line between daring and dangerous. For myself, such adventure included braving and exploring the dry, barren landswells, which made up the Southern California Pomona hillside, near where I once resided, in my youth...regretfully, now overrun by generic, Stepford village trac-housing. Me and my motley crew of friends would sneak into the cattle strewn corrals, beneath these hills...taking the chance of angry wayward, rock-salt-shotgun-armed ranchers in helicopters, overhead (...truth be known, they couldn't hit the side of a barn, from point blank range, the bastards)...hiking up to the hills, and camping out, knowing full well that wild wolves populated the thicketed hill crevices...then, coming back down the next day, to the streets & abode-structured, rural 'civilization', with shoeboxes filled with tarantulas (...oh, how Mom LOVED that...). It is a boy's world, not all that far removed from this...a world filled with danger and intrigue...which inescapably springboards into the chillingly compelling, Southern fried drama, "Mud"...

Movie Review: Maniac (2013)

Review by John Beutler

Ya' know?? For a while there, I was worried...worried that this new incarnation of the uncompromisingly violent, brutal, perverse and grimy 1980 splatter horror classic, "Maniac", would suffer in much the same way as other attempts at making...or rather, remaking some of the more prominent and controversial '80's horror flicks (...like "Friday the 13th" and "Last House on the Left", for instance), in that the film would be newly rendered in what this viewer has previously & often termed as having a 'rustic slickness', which often tends to temper the overall tone of raw and visceral horror, notable in classics past. Well, I'm quite elated to say that this is not wholly the case, as the 2013 film, "Maniac" definitely exhues a most familiar, albeit slightly toned down and polished sense of dark, inner-city, back-alley filth and seediness...one of the aspects, which made the original film very uncomfortably irresistible to watch...though indeed, this new 'Maniac' definitely reflects a sense of higher production value, as compared to it's inspiration. That been said, the film...despite how respectably accomplished it looks, and how effectively the film unnerves and unsettles...DOES somewhat fail in ways that seem inevitable and unavoidable...in ways, which made the original film so alluringly embraceable...

Interview: Porn Legend Tom Byron

Cinema Head Cheese's intrepid reporter, James DePaolo, crosses swords...err we mean sword, to swiss army knife, with one of the kings of porno and his idol, Tom Byron! This one get's a little filthy, so enjoy you dirty birds!!

1. My god, Tom Byron, fuck I am truly not worthy of this honor. Thanks for taking the time. I have to ask a guy in porn,( esp. one that has over 30 years of films) have you ever went down on a chick, and she smelt so rank..if so what do you do..do you tell her?

TB: Thankfully, that's usually not a problem. When it is, I handle it discreetly. Not everyone does, though

2. How can dating a regular chick do anything for you, when you sleep with hot girls all day in movies?

TB: I really don't date regular girls. Everyone I come in contact with it seems has some connection to the biz... I'll tell you one thing. My schedule lately doesn't seem to allow much time for socializing in general.