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April 4, 2012

Movie Review: Hack Job (2011)

I know it's tough to make an independent horror film. I've been a part of that process. Horror is the one genre that people will watch at the no budget level, so it's where most people seem to start. The problem with this is that it stacks the horror section with crap, floor to ceiling. Hack Job starts off acting like it intended for this movie to be pure shit, but I don't believe it. I think it really was supposed to be good, and the filmmakers took an easy out.

Buy Hack Job on DVD

Our filmmakers start off by killing an indie art film director. They complain that horror doesn't get its due. They go on for the rest of the movie proving the naysayers right. The duo gets a script from Satan that's supposed to be the greatest horror film ever. As we find out, the three stories in the anthology turn out to be fairly worthless.

The first is about a mummy's curse that is brought on by Nazis. It's not a great story, and it seems to meander along. The second story is the only one really worth watching. It's about a terrible battle of the bands contest. The filmmakers do everything possible to make you not give a shit about the characters. In the middle of the show, an alien shows up and starts eating people. Dave Brockie, better known as Oderus from GWAR shows up in full costume and attempts to fight the monster. The third story was just plain boring. It's about a chosen warrior who goes on a killing spree I'll admit to zoning out on that one. I just couldn't care.

Hack Job has a couple of cult horror cameos in it. Debbie Rochon shows up, and Lloyd Kaufman does a good job playing himself. There's a huge clue into how bad this movie is. They have no real distribution. Lloyd Kaufman is in the movie for a significant amount of time, and his character jokes that he'll pick up anything for Troma. He didn't pick up Hack Job. He was right not to. You shouldn't either.

Note: After posting this, I found out that Wild Eye is releasing the film in May. -Kevin

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