Cinema Head Cheese: Podshort! - Animal Factory (Arrow Video, 2000/2017)

Steve Buscemi directs an all-star cast in this story of a young man's time in prison.

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Movie Review: In the Blood (2014)

There seems to be a genre of action films in which the main character used to be some tough badass, and right as they're turning a new leaf to become a kinder, gentler them, someone they love disappears, and they have to return to their former badassery. In the Blood is no exception. In a flashback to start the movie, young Ava is taught how to be tough by her dad. She's also taught to be an emotionless stiff with a mind for killing. Really, it's what any dad would do. Look for my daughter the robot in a few years. Anyway, we come to present day, when Ava is about to walk down the aisle and marry Derek, the son of a wealthy douchebag (Treat Williams) who assumes that Ava is nothing but a gold digger. This might have to do with the fact that the happy couple met in drug rehab.

The couple weds and heads off to an exotic Caribbean vacation to a house owned by Derek's family. At a local restaurant, they're befriended by a young guy named Manny, who promises to take the couple ziplining. I'm going to let you guess what happens next. Got it yet? Come on, it's not that hard. There you go. Something goes wrong on the zipline. Derek's hook snaps, and though Manny tries to save him, he crashes through the trees, breaking his leg. For some reason, the ambulance drivers won't let Ava ride along, and she loses them on the way to the hospital. This is when, as the kids say, shit gets real.

Movie Review: Zombie Hunter (2013, Well Go USA)

...without a doubt, Danny Trejo has to be the hardest working character actor, working in Hollywood, these days...so much so, in fact, his very presence in genre films might well be defined as outright exploitative. After all, considering his vast and eclectically varied resume of completed and in-progress starring film productions (...a 'wow' revelation, over at IMDB), it does almost seem like he appears in just about every other genre film, under the sun...for the most part, playing nearly the same 'anti-hero'-like characters that...despite the wayward change in costume, setting and situation...do not seem all that far removed from each other, from character to character. And surprisingly enough, in most of these films, Danny is cast in roles which...despite the occasional, full-blown starring role (...uh, can anyone say, "Machete"?)...don't seem to last, or fare too long, in the course of whatever film he might be featured in...with the exploitative justification being that, despite his minimal appearance in many of his films, the powers-the-be, as far as distribution and advertising, often see fit to frontline his name and mean-looking visage on film posters and home video venue covers. Taking all that in account, it might be easy to see that.....

BREAKING NEWS!!!

"We interrupt the lovingly dedicated, in-progress celebrity reveling, with this breaking report...First-Time Filmmaker Kevin King Initiates 'Kickstarter' Campaign, In Effort to Illicit Funds for Production of Dream Horror/Actioner, Called "Zombie Hunter" (...no relation to the Japanese manga), Premieres Said Film At Montreal-Based 2013 Fantasia International Film Festival...And In the End, Concocts Slap-Together Sloppy, Very Contrived, Overly Emulative, 'So What' Eye-Rolling & Shoulder-Shrugging, and Overall Brainless Entry In Well-Worn 'Zombie' Horror Film Sub-Genre"...

Movie Review: "20ft Below: The Darkness Descending" (2014; Blue Dragon/Vertical Entertainment)

...yeah, yeah...I know; go ahead and say it..."...sheesh!! Another Danny Trejo flick??" Well, far be it for this viewer to diss ol' Danny...clearly the hardest working character actor, working today, as well as the most formidable, reputable and dynamic...even in his most minimal presence, in some of his films. And yet, far be it for this viewer, in beating a dead horse, with repeated commentary about that very thing; in brief, just check out Danny's work to date, over at the IMDB website...what he has done, what he is presently doing, and what still waits in the wings (...your jaw will assuredly drop). Anyways, 'nuff said about that, right??...

...speaking of 'wings', this viewer cannot help but appreciate having initially viewed a screener of Danny's latest direct-to-video entry, "20ft Below: The Darkness Descending"...once again, he's headlining, but making minimal presence, here; the advance screener comprised of just the disc, bearing the cover art, as depicted here, and did not include anything else...and for anyone out there, haunting the dollar-rental obelisk, just outside their local convenience store, 'anything else' might well be manipulatively deceptive, as "20ft Below..." is most assuredly something different...dare I say, something perhaps better, on a genre or exploitation film level, than what is seemingly promised in the sensationalist synopsis, on the DVD cover, which this viewer was later privy of (...yep, bought this one outright, myself). In short, there's no denying that this Trejo entry has bite, but at the same time, it also has something important to say...and to the fine advertising folks, who scribbled the synopsis, this viewer cannot help but say, "...hey, let the film stand on it's own merit, OK?? A respectable force unto itself, the film didn't need any help from the sensationalist peanut gallery..."...

Movie Review: Sushi Girl (2012, Magnolia)

...before gleefully and dutifully engaging this review, let's start off by saying that this viewer is a sucker for a good movie trailer. Beyond the generated hype & publicity of a movie, the advance viewing & review by critics, the suggested star power & creative hand...both behind & in front of the camera, the leaked footage & behind-the-scenes video commentary...it is a stand-out, well crafted movie trailer that quite literally grabs me by the shirt collar, slams me resoundingly up against the wall, and insistently commands my utmost attention. Granted, as does happen from time to time, some movie trailers DO exclusively feature what is best about a specific movie, with the movie itself, on a whole, proving to be something less than what the trailer promised; that's part of the gamble, I suppose...the nature of the beast...when one gets irresistably and invariably pulled in by the suggested content of the movie trailer, and as the result, committedly lays down one's hard earned samolians for the feature film, itself. However, when a movie carried through on the promise...'walks the walk', rather than merely 'talk the talk', via it's intendedly influential and compelling movie trailer, one cannot help but praise that artfully creative little two-to-two-and-a-half minutes of tease...that eye-and-mind-catching vanguard of great things to come...in the same light as the film itself proves to be...the trailer, being merely a tantilizing taste at the bottom of the shotglass...and the film, harboring the numbing contents of the whole bottle...

Machete Scavenger Hunt

We have a couple of Machete reviews already, so I won't bother to get into details on this one. The movie is funny, full of action, and worth watching twice in three days, which I did. If you haven't seen it, you really should. Danny Trejo is a guy whose name I'm always happy to see in the credits of any movie. I hope they make the sequels that the end credits promise.

Buy Machete [Blu-ray] or DVD

I did notice several great things in this movie. I want to see if you can find them too. So, if you've seen it or you haven't, I decided to create a little scavenger hunt. Print this list before you watch the movie, and see what you can find. Don't worry, there aren't any real spoilers here. I just think this is a hell of a lot of fun.