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Showing posts with label action. Show all posts
Showing posts with label action. Show all posts

August 8, 2021

The Divine Fury (2019) Movie Review

I actually didn’t plan to write up a review on this film. I wanted to spend the evening watching a Korean horror movie and just enjoy it. WELL…it’s the next day and I’m still thinking about how much I liked the film, despite its few flaws, and wanted to share, okay? STOP ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS!

Anyway…

Since this film just came out a couple of years ago, I will do my best to remain spoiler free. I don’t promise shit, but I’ll try.

The Divine Fury is, at its core, a movie about faith. It’s dressed up with MMA fighting and bare chested healthy young men (*ROWR*), kick ass fight scenes, cool special effects, and a kicking soundtrack. But if you take all that away, it’s about faith. And I think I can even stretch that to say it doesn’t necessarily have to be about faith in one God. It could apply to faith in anything or anyone.

Let me break it down a bit more.

Yong-hu has grown up (movie starts off with him around 10 years old perhaps?) without a mom. She died during childbirth. He and his dad, a local police officer, live out their days as happily as they can. Right off the bat, the issue of faith in God and the power of prayer is established in Yong-hu. He doesn’t understand that even though his dad prayed really hard, Yong-hu’s mom still died. And after his father is severely injured in a hit and run, the local priest tells Yong-hu that if he prays really hard, God will save his dad.

Well, what do you suppose happens?

From that moment on, Yong-hu has no faith, doesn’t believe in God, and every time he sees a cross or some kind of Christian religious symbolism, he flies into a rage. 20 years later that helps with his MMA career, but his soul? Not so much. By holding on to that hatred and anger, he allows demons to surround him at all times. The voice in his head, that he thinks is just his own, is the manipulation demons uses against him.

After suffering from nightmares, Yong-hu develops a stigmata in his right palm. Not sure what to do, his driver suggests a legit shaman – the driver’s niece. She tells Yong-hu he needs to go find a priest at a church not far from his home and he’ll help.

Yong-hu finds the priest during a hella exorcism and ends up helping the older priest on his missions. During all of these, we learn of the Black Bishop, someone who uses religious rights to summon demons. This BB is in town and he’s wreaking havoc. They need to stop him PDQ.

Evil never looked so sexy...

In his journey helping Father Ahn exorcise demons, Yong-hu realizes that his father’s ring, and the energy his father passed along before he crossed over to Heaven, gave Yong-hu some powerful blood that can dispel demons. Handy that he’s got stigmata, amirite? His blood and a little douse of Holy Water sets those demons aflame and back to Hell. So Yong-hu ends up battling the Black Bishop, saving everyone in town from the powers of evil.

 

Now, full disclosure for anyone new, I have a bias toward South Korean television and movies. I’m addicted to K-dramas, to put it bluntly, and Korea does a great job with horror films. So I probably liked this movie more than a ‘normal’ person would. There are flaws here, for sure, but for the most part I could overlook them because I enjoyed so many other aspects of the film.

For the bad: this movie is 2 hours and 15 minutes. No movie needs to be that long, seriously. Not just for the short attention span folks of my generation (I blame MTV) but also just the comfort level. I can’t imagine watching this in a theater. Even from my cozy couch, my back got stiff and I fidgeted a lot to remain comfortable. We didn’t need four to five examples of how the bad guy gets what he wants from the main demon. That was established with two. Didn’t need three to four exorcisms with Father Ahn to understand how taxing and difficult they are. Not exactly sure how the awkward fan interactions with Yong-hu progressed the story in any way (spoiler: they didn’t).


Bitch, I look good.

The CGI was a mixed bag. I always appreciate practical effects when they can be utilized, but I do understand some stuff just has to be done by computer. Unfortunately, some of it was not the highest quality and came off as cartoonish. But some was really cool and certainly enhanced the story. As for the story, most of it is well written and developed. Though there are quite a few trite and cliché moments throughout the film, you quickly forget about them as the action picks up or the character development progresses.

Mostly those were my issues. The story, cinematography, soundtrack, fight choreography, editing, sound, acting, and directing certainly made up for any flaws. Many of these can be subjective (any kind of artistic direction or music choice, for sure) but there’s no doubt as to the acting talent. Park Seo-jun (Yong-hu) shows us a young man consumed with anger toward God who then evolves and can finally let go of that blackness to help those in need. Ahn Sung-ki (Father Ahn) has been acting since he was 5-years old. Though Father Ahn is fighting demons throughout the film, the character is so gentle and patient with Yong-hu, despite the younger man’s vitriol aimed at him.

But I think my favorite actor was Woo Do-hwan (Ji-Sin, aka The Black Bishop). He plays this attractive, smooth, unassuming club owner. His subversive nature, though, is in service of a terrible snake demon and the way he manipulates people to do what he wants is rather unnerving. He has no qualms about removing ANY obstacle and doing what’s necessary to achieve his evil goals. And guess what? He didn’t need to kill the dog to show us. Now, what he does with the dog…I won’t tell you but (and maybe this makes me a monster) it was awesome.

Also his transformation at the end looked pretty fucking tits. From what I could tell, it was practical latex/foam or something to that effect. Looked completely real and natural, you know, as far as a snake demon would look. Even as he pulled off his wet cloak, it looked like a snake shedding its skin. So fucking cool.

So if you enjoy a good versus evil story, redemption films, or demons in general (and who doesn’t??), and you don’t mind reading subtitles (please don’t watch dubbed foreign films if you don’t have to), check out The Divine Fury. You won’t be disappointed.

3.5 Hatchets (out of 5)






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December 17, 2020

Movie Review: "The Very Excellent Mr. Dundee" (2020, Transmission Films/Lionsgate)




...ya' know, folks?? There's a classic line from the 1985 apocalyptic actioner, "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome", where the Tina Turner character, Auntie Entity says 'tsk, tsk' resignedly to Max..."...my, how the world turns, doesn't it?? One day...cock of the walk...and the next, a feather duster...". Now, I only mention that line in parallel with "The Very Excellent Mr. Dundee", in a sort of positive, albeit melancholy way. After all, until he surprisingly showed up in an Australian travelogue Super Bowl TV commercial spot, a couple years ago (...a delightful piece of comical whimsy, which rampantly sparked a rumor of a fourth 'Dundee' movie), most folks out there probably assumed that Paul Hogan had quietly retired, faded away, and even outright let loose his mortal coil. Which makes THIS lightweight, slapstick funny 'slice of life' (...what was the line in Blake Edwards' 1988 mystery/comedy?? Something like '...hey, it's all true...give or take a lie or two!!'), all the more surprising...and well, quite amusing actually...

...yes, folks...Paul Hogan proves himself still quite well alive and kicking (...expressively, Paul Hogan and his inescapable 'Crocodile Dundee' character have never really been that far removed from each other...albeit, the latter had the more daredevil/thrill-seeker side to him), and herein this film...playing himself, of course...totally realizes that his legendary 'Crocodile Dundee' celebrity glory days are long-since past (...there ARE the occasional ribs 'n' pokes, here and there, aimed at his other films...and despite the critical naysayers...hey, I LIKED "Lightning Jack", thank you very much!!). All he seems content to do, by this time, is to fully retire, relax, embrace his golden years, and in the course of this film's events, try to make an appearance at his loving grand-daughter's holiday school recital...


...however...Hollywood itself (...gotta love that gawl-darn city of dreams) absolutely loves nostalgia, and equally loves a comeback. And so, with the help of a doting, closely attending, though quite insistent agent (...a sort of 'hand-me-down' agent, actually...the 'daughter' of Paul's supposed original agent), Paul is reluctantly convinced into not only a proposed knighthood by the Queen of England (...seems that "Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles" is her favorite movie), but the prospects of yet another 'Dundee' movie (...quite candidly, I loved the bumbling 'faux' movie sequel concept, in that Super Bowl ad...hell, bring THAT on!!). And it's the slapstick aftermath of the announcement of those two lucrative prospects, which Paul finds himself inexplicably caught up in, that invariably ensues...


...what's quite interesting about this film...it's not only about an almost forgotten 'legend', chasing down his glory days (...uh, nope, probably the wrong term...something more like '...for good, or for bad...being reluctantly pushed back into the limelight'), it's also about how our dearly dedicated, albeit quite invasive press and media, just LOVE to exploit a reportable situation...especially if it's not in the best of light. Comeback news is good news...but as history has often dictated, negative comeback news and negative behind-the-scenes behavior makes for even better coverage, as far as journalism goes. And so, with each and every slapstick pratfall, which Paul gets caught up in, the press invariably twists each of the accidentally instilled incidents, so that it makes Paul look like...well, makes him look like an asshole. Something which Paul and/or 'Dundee' himself might have simply shoulder-shrugged off, with a resounding 'eh'...if not for the fact that the negative press is threatening to adversely affect how his dear grand-daughter sees him...



...here...naturally looking older, more weathered (...like, as if he didn't already look weathered enough, some 30-plus years ago), and somewhat slower...nonetheless, Paul Hogan's irreverent, down-under savvy, charm and personality still manages to exude an embraceable sense of both nostalgia, as well as the welcome notion of 'yeah, I might be older and more weathered, but hey...I'm still kickin'. Actress Racheal Carpani is typically affecting enough as Paul's frazzled, albeit dedicated agent/manager, without going overboard on the standard character (...as opposed to the ol' stereotype of '...daw-leen...you look faw-bulous'), as she repeatedly/exasperatedly buries her face in her hands, with each and every bit of trouble that Paul inadvertently gets into. Nate Torrance, as a bumbling photographer, trying to get any inside 'dope' on Paul, and instead ends up palling around with him, seems sort of negligible in the sense that he appears to be playing the same type of bumbling character that actor Jonah Hill used to play, early in his career. And upcomer Jacob Elordi is charming, albeit somewhat ill-used as Paul's live-in son, who seems to come off here looking like a handsome yuppie adult version of John Cusack's smarmy and talented lil' brother, in the 80's flick, "Better Off Dead", with Paul (...who accepts and loves the lad, but really doesn't know a lot about him) inadvertently walking in on him, or bumping into him, entertaining the ladies in his room, or cooing poolside guests with a light-strumming guitar riff...


...but then, the overall sense of nostalgia in this little trite of a film, amusingly stretches beyond that of Paul Hogan himself. Playing themselves...Olivia Newton-John, Wayne Knight (...as an unexpected house guest of Paul's), and Reginald VelJohnson (...remember 'Gus', the limo driver in the original "...Dundee"...and of course, his cop role in "Die Hard"??) seem little more like quick '...hey, that's (fill in the blank)' roles, but it was still rather fun and nice to see them. The funniest cameo bits here, however, can be attributed to Chevy Chase...here, exaggeratedly playing up the supposed 'asshole' persona that the press has often reportedly attributed him as...and at the same time, he's amusingly thumbing his nose at the notion...as well as John Cleese, herein exasperatedly resigned to string out his remaining post-comedic twilight years as an unlicensed, chase-happy Uber driver. Heck, even fellow Aussie Mel Gibson gets in a quick jab, in a fleeting piece of what appears to be recent archival interview footage, with Mel looking as if he just stepped off the set of his recent irreverent Christmas flick, "Fatman"...


...having foregone and bypassed any sort of theatrical release...uh, thanks to the wretched pandemic..."The Very Excellent Mr. Dundee" has instead been unceremoniously dumped onto streaming venues. which is a bit of a shame, as it may not find the whole of the audience who would appreciate the overall warm sense of nostalgia, which the film assuredly has. As such, this trite and warmly affecting bit of comical muse...may well pass by with little notice. On the whole, 'Excellent' might well be too strong a word for this one...perhaps more like a funny and charming tip of the hat...and that makes it good enough to warrant checking this one out.....




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March 9, 2019

Movie Review: "Guardians" (2017; Big Cinema House/Enjoy Movies/Renovatio Entertainment/Shout Factory)


…sigh!! Every year…or perhaps these days, it’s better to say, every few weeks…’it’s the same old story’…

…huh-boy!! Here we go again, folks!! The dust hardly settles from the dynamic, albeit overrated impact of the last great big blow-hard superhero movie, and before you know it, along comes another one…with a heavy sigh, followed by a deftly hand-gestured ‘yank, yank, yank’. Ah, me…alright, good or bad, whether we like it or not, lay it on us. What do we got, this time?? Another dark and brooding hero type, dedicated to a ruthless combat of the criminal types who left him without family?? Even more genetically mutated wonders, endowed with powers to defeat the evils of a world that superficially sees the heroes as mere freaks of nature?? Can there possibly be one more deal with the devil, with the person who made the deal, afforded dark powers to be used in the devil’s servitude, to which that person then reneges on said deal, and instead uses the powers for goodness, rather than badness. Is this world big enough for yet one more super powered alien…the last of his race, sent to this world, in an effort to preserve his heritage, and at the same time, lay roots in a new home, with a new people, which he swears to defend against fiendish perpetrators of evil and crime, both earthly and other-worldly??

…yeah, sing it again, and again, and again, Bonnie…”…isn’t there a white knight, upon a fiery steed??”…huh-boy…sigh, with a bowed head shake and eyeball roll (…nope!! Not suffering from superhero movie fatigue here, folks…nope, not at all…sigh…)…

…ah yes, the stories are varied…the characters, countless…the attitudes, like someone with bipolar affliction, ever- changing on a dime. Of course, there’s also the assumed set and/or adjusted expectations of the masses, especially from the viewpoint of those geek-savvy with the popular arts, who might be familiar with it all, via the hallowed pages of those four-colored, multi-paneled comic rags. Really, at some point, one cannot help but feel that all these stories, characters and situations invariably blend into each other, to the point where we, the paying audience, pretty much rolls our eyes, let out a sigh, take in the next superhero movie…driven with an almost commercially manufactured ‘do whatever the crowd does’ anticipation…then, just short of tossing that movie aside, followed by the sigh-instilling after-thought of ‘harrumph…OK, next?’, here comes another generic, assembly-line, cookie cutter episode of super powered daring do, with about damn near the same goals, intermingled with the same conflicts and the same personal problems…

…really, it’s totally understandable, when…after so many of these ‘same-old, same-old’ superhero movies gone by, and still to come…well, we just can’t help but jump the fence, and start rooting for the villains, rather than the heroes. Hey...no secret that the bad guys are insurmountably much more interesting, alluring and fun, than the good guys anyways, right??...

…and yet, despite all this yah-dah-dah, yah-dah-dah, wah-fucking-wahhing, what do we do?? Why, we just saunter our butts right back up to that thar’ ticket booth, and once again fork over our hard-earned simolians, for yet another jaw-dropping, eye-poping, head-droning, rock ‘em/sock ‘em, CGI-oversaturated super-powered epic. It’s kinda like that old George Carlin ‘ice cream’ gag…you know, you eat the ice cream, you get that painful brain freeze, you rub away that excruciatingly cold spot in your throat, and afterwards, what do you do?? Eat more ice cream!! Gotta quote ol’ George in saying, “…what, are we fucking stupid??”…

…truth be known…yeah, yeah sure…admittedly, amidst the polished and clean-cut assembly-line standard and stereotype, as far as the seemingly never-ending superhero movie genre…every few films or so, our fine tinsel-town filmmakers, writers and directors do manage to invoke an unconventional twist, a skewed change in tone, a rebellious attitude, a more jovially flavoring, which genuinely manages to breathe at least some measure of fresh new life into the stale, by-the-numbers proceedings. A generous whiff of ‘hey, what if’ into the mix-master…maybe something a bit original to liven things up, perhaps beyond that of what might have already been done or written. Something like…well, like…
…come, as we shift the locale, and the time circuits to…oh say, Russia…during the Cold War, some 40 odd years previous…when, under the cloak of absolute government secrecy, two renowned scientists devise a lucrative and ambitious project, code named ‘Patriot’…the sole purpose of which is directed towards experimental human genetic manipulation, in an effort towards creating super-powered soldiers. Well, now…it seems that one of the scientists…Professor Kuratov…having something more than a difference of opinion with his scientist partner, as far as the speed and direction of the project’s science and application, goes rogue, steals the project’s research data, and begins initiating his own experiments on chosen ‘volunteers’; the military, hard and fast on the hunt for Kuratov, catches up with him…though the professor’s capture is thwarted when he blows up his own laboratories, and presumably himself, in the process…
…four decades later, Kuratov inexplicably returns; however, he has since become quite scarred and mentally screwed, assuming crazed delusions of grandeur, and having harnessed a cache of artificially endowed psychic powers over all electronics and mechanical devices. Stealing military weaponry and prototypes, Kuratov instigates a path of destruction, with the ultimate intent upon assuming worldwide control over all man-made mechanics and technology…
…with a good measure of caution and reluctance, the Russian military re-initiates the ages-old ‘Patriot’ program, and launches a countrywide search for any of the numerous, now-super-powered, and hopefully still living human ‘guinea pigs’, who were invariably discarded and scattered across the continent, soon after Kuratov explosively eighty-sixed his work…all now rumored to be living out their lives in conflicting, bittersweet peace and secrecy. The covert military search manages to find four of them: Ursus (Anton Pampushnyy), a young and rugged-looking scientist, living in isolation deep in the sheltering Siberian forests, and possessing the ability to willfully transform himself partially or completely into a hulking and powerful beast of a bear. Khan (Sanjar Madi), discovered in white sand desert wastelands…there, applying his martial arts skills as a darkly clad mercenary…is armed with large, crescent-shaped, scythe-like swords, and has the ability to move at lightning speed. A weathered and elderly, monk-like farmer named Ler (Sebastien Sisak), has staked claim in the war-scarred battlements of a castle’s ruins…his power, the ability to move and manipulate the very earth and surrounding rock formations, beneath his feet. And found applying her unique abilities of underwater invisibility to the awed delight of an appreciative audience…applauding witnesses to a lavishly staged magic show, Xenia (Alina Lanina) completes the sought team of reluctant super-powered dissidents…
…bitter, reluctant and bewildered, considering a tortured past which they’d rather forget, or have outright forgotten altogether…the genetically altered foursome, despite inner conflict and reservations, find a common purpose with which to bond with…the capture and persecution of the one that created them…an old adversary who is as powerfully altered as they are. But will their combined might, as difficult as that proves to be to assemble, be enough to see them through the impending battle…a battle, which although their first, might well be their last??...
…now, right out the gate…the most intriguing ‘cлoh’ (…read: 'elephant') in the room, is the front & center fact that…hey, we’re like, talking Russian superheroes here, folks. OK, yeah…we’ve sorta been here before, given that, despite a certain beloved, Slavic-accented, metal-skinned member of the X-Men…not to mention, the imaginatively alternative reality ‘what if’ published exploits of a certain legendary interstellar ‘man of steel’, told from the perspective of having landed, as an infant, in a Ukrainian Farm commune, vice a vast, albeit random Kansas grain field, the idea of super-powered heroes, originating from Russia…yeah, this sort of thing nonetheless remains a rather unique and novel one. And as far as the fictional superhero realm, as a whole, the mere suggestion ideally mirrors a juxapositioned measure of creative literary arrogance, that presumptuously dictates…for the most part…that the crust of the superhero populous would exclusively and stereotypically originate from these 'might makes right', wholesome ‘apple pie and stars ‘n’ stripes’ domestic shores…
…indeed, in retrospect of having seen “Guardians”, and genuinely walking away with a respectable amount of appreciation for the notably flawed, though moderately engaging drama, dynamic action and rousing adventure, featuring a new, albeit clearly inspired rag-tag band of cross-continental, super-powered rogues…yes, inspired, but a wholly original-enough written crew, as opposed to the already set-forth ‘comic page panel to silver screen’ translations from the renowned minds, over at Marvel and DC…this reviewer is of the subsequent opinion that…yeah, there might well be room enough for this special brand of ultra-powered misfit daring doers, in the hallowed and honored annuls of the superhero film genre…
…and a rather unconventional, albeit relatable and tragic crew of regionally diversified misfits, this motley bunch most assured are. Ursus, the burly and seclusive were-bear scientist…later armed with a gargantuan-sized, psychically directional version of the ol’ Painless Gatling gun, from ‘Predator’…harbors inner torture, conflict and insecurity, in the sense that every time a desperate situation necessarily calls for him to initiate his monstrous and beastly transformation, he fears losing control one day, in finding the inability to become human again. The weathered and burnt-out loner Ler, who’s powers are supplemented by the military, enabling him to string and weld conjoined pieces of rock into an electro-plasma-charged whip, is the most defiant of the quartet, as far his reluctantly gifted abilities…preferring to remain in solitude, but nonetheless finds vengeful purpose in being recruited into the team. Xenia invariably, though later willingly joins up in an effort to shed light upon her past…a clouded past, which she has absolutely no memory of; she is later provided with a specialized suit that enables her to control her invisibility at will, as well as being able to focus those powers on anything she touches. And then, there’s the zen-spirited, ninja-like Khan…for the impending battle, retrofitted with an impenetrable armor…though preferring to further his solo fervor as a hired soldier-of-fortune, nonetheless brings his extraordinary talents to the table, if only to do what is right, in thwarting a world threatening megalomaniac, welding a formidably disastrous and destructive power…
…for the most part, the able-bodied cast is adequate to the varied and diversified characters they portray; however, much like the film’s reluctant superhero components needing to cooperate with each other…work with each other, to exude that classic ‘sum of the whole is far greater than the individual parts’ ideology, “Guardians” shines best when this misfit ensemble share their screen time, as opposed to individual focus. In fact, the more notably singular standout characters, though affecting, are not even directly associated with the team itself. Actress Valeriya Shkirando proves a more dynamic presence on the screen, than even our hapless superhero entities…channeling an alluring and feminine ‘Nick Fury’ like presence in the proceedings, in playing the military’s Major Larina. And as an equally dynamic adversary type, Stanislav Shirin deliciously plays up the over-the-top, ‘crazy but not stupid’ card, as the super-mega-charged megalomaniac Kuratov…so much so, in fact, one might genuinely believe this totally formidable, mad and insane character could potentially give any number of the Marvel or DC goodie-goodies, a run for their money. Crossover, anyone??...
……to the film’s credit…eh, definitely better than some, but falling short of greatness…the overall production values and visual dynamics seem to fall with the range of…oh say, just short of your basic big-bucks Marvel ensemble entry, and one of the more ambitiously reaching fantasy films, culled from the budget-driven knock-off/mockbuster folks, over at The Asylum. Yet surprisingly enough, and going into “Guardians” with an open mind, the imperfections…as far as the level of, the unpolished quality of, and the interchanging chemistry between the CGI, optical and practical special effects…are pretty much acceptable, forgivable, and really not all that distracting (…as opposed to the demanding expectations, versus the resulting imperfect visuals of Marvel’s recent ‘Captain Marvel’ domestic release…though fleeting, but very distracting…but that’s a whole other story). Also to the film’s credit…the outstanding, though economic set designs, the nice integration of outer locales with the special effects (…the city-rampaging ‘bug robots’ were pretty cool, reminding me of a more up-scaled and ‘lifelike’ version of the ‘animated’ grid bugs, in 1982’s “Tron”), and the slick, varied & extraordinarily detailed prop and costume work…overall and clearly, a matter of resourcefully making so little, look like a helluva lot…a higher level of the ‘silk purse, out of a sow’s ear’ type of economic production, so to speak…
…storywise, the approach to this material has it wearing a distinctly dark and stone-cold cloak of air, with sort of forced moments of levity, and a mostly haunting soundtrack (…the ‘Guardians’ theme, is particularly and memorably mesmerizing), which anyone on these shores might stereotypically expect, considering this is a Russian production; however, that’s also what makes these dynamic proceedings surprising…that Russian filmmakers herein, vied for the stereotype, or what might have been expected, versus something wholly unconventional and unexpected (…this, among other reasons, might possibly explain why the film was unanimously lambasted by Russian and European audiences, upon initial theatrical release). Oh, without a doubt, the basic superhero crust is there…with clearly notable and inspired nods towards the Avengers (…and the team’s singular components), the X-Men, and Guardians of the Galaxy…but the core of the premise itself…from the characters, to the story components and set-up… seems not unlike that of classic paper dolls, with their interchangeable variety of ‘fold-the-tab-over’ clothing, and the clearly mad clothier was left to the whims of his wild imagination, in doing the clothing…adding layer upon layer…until you have something totally absurd and outrageous, yet still oddly appealing…
…short and sweet (…as usual with me, far too late for that), for a superhero film best watched in the original Russian language, with subtitles (...the domestic dubbing is a little on the silly side), “Guardians” is not a particularly great entry into the mass super-powered hero relay…but it is a respectably good and worthwhile one...original, in an inspired way (...i.e., not based upon any direct literary source, but taking it's cues from other, higher-profile sources), which cries out in curiosity, towards being further explored (…a reportedly financial flop in Russia, the lead production company went bankrupt…though, a proposed sequel , co-produced and co-financed with filmmakers in China, has not been ruled out; take my money now, guys...I'm in); in culinary terms, the film is like half-baked chocolate chip cookie dough, in that it’s not quite all the way done yet, but it’s still pretty damn tasty and eatable. Can you imagine what they'd have, and we’d subsequently have, if they’d just let that puppy cook to it’s full potential??

...uh, should the folks over at Marvel and DC be concerned, or worried??



TEXT HERE

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March 3, 2019

Movie Review: "Death Kiss" (2017; Millman Productions/Mosquito Entertainment/Uncorked Entertainment)



…”…I’m just a bill…yes, I’m only a bill…and someday I’m gonna be a law-w-w-w…oh, I hope and pray that I will, but today I am still…just a bill…”…

…no secret that in order to make for a good exploitation film…and we’re focusing on a pretty wide window, here…from the thrifty ‘30’s, to today’s torrid toddies…the classic exploitation film…well, it just has to have something to exploit, right?? A gimmick, for lack of a better word. And over the almost 100-year span of cult film history, gimmicky exploitation films have come and gone…the less enduring gimmicks, fading as surely as a film fades to black, but permanently (…hey, I’m looking at you, ‘Terror of Tiny Town’, ‘Zaat’ and ‘Lambada, the Forbidden Dance’, just to name a scant few of the come, gone and went’s)…

…however, it also stands to reason, with history having often dictated…given a well-written rendering, some dynamically memorable visuals & direction…not to mention, some accompanying performances to play alongside…well, that lil’ ol’ exploitation gimmick may well unexpectedly find itself nurtured and transmogrified into a genre…proudly and shamelessly rearing it’s muck-crusted visage into the sun…or rather onto the flickering screen of countless anytown cinematic cathedrals, indoor and outdoor…again, and again, and again…

…now, we could spend ages here, b’wees ‘n’ goils, listing and covering an endless string of cult film genres (…and truth be known, I almost did, in my own imitable, albeit exhausting fashion…uh, can you say ‘rewrite’??), from dusty grungy biker flicks, to the sex-crazed, catfight-instilling antics of women behind bars…from the far-northern offerings of Canuxploitation (…that’s Canada, to you and me), to the deep-southern reaches of ozploitation (…oh, those Aussies), and as far easterly as the home of the giallo, the spaghetti western, and the Nazi camp nasties…all of this and more, as seen from the countless steamy, musky-smelling aisles of the pitch-black inner-city grindhouse theater balconies…as well as the equally steamy and musky, albeit cramped confines of a free-wheein’ convertible at the local drive-in…

…interestingly enough, some of the more obscure and lesser exploitation genres were based directly upon specific things, specific places…even specific people and characters. Which might explain why in the ‘spaghetti western’ genre, we had countless, though mostly un-associated films on the Django and Sartana characters. Chum-chompin’ shark-spoitation, anyone?? Down home, red-necked, okie single-toothed, Kentucky- fried Hixsploitation?? Can’t get enough perversely sacrilegious, virginal deflowering Nunspoitation, right?? And leave us not forget about ass-kickin’, chop-socky Bruce-sploitation, or even Travolta-sploitation (…the single movie of which I covered herein, some years ago, with “John Travolto... da un insolito destino”…also known as “The Face with Two Left Feet”). Or how about…well, this…
…Anna, a young and attractive single mother, having abruptly moved from the deliberating scourges of inner-city violence, to the seemingly peaceful, safe and reassuring country outskirts with her invalid, wheelchair-restricted daughter, is nonetheless made uneasy and cautious, when she receives mysterious packages in the mail, containing very large sums of money. As the packages continue to arrive, with no sign of who and where they might be from, Ana becomes gradually aware of an ever-vigilant and equally mysterious stranger in the distance, keenly watching the both of them with a certain elating and seemingly protective satisfaction…
…unbeknownst to Ana, this mysterious stranger…when he’s not holding a dedicated vigilance over her and her daughter…has ruthlessly staked a bloody and vengeful claim of private justice over the criminals, thieves and drug dealers in the neighboring city area, violently gunning them down in retributive cold blood, and taking their money. In the midst of relentlessly wading through a seemingly never-ending siege of slimy and grungy criminal element…with guns a-blazing, this urban terminator, slowly but surely, makes his way through the city’s crime-driven ranks, to the one nefarious perpetrator who appears to be in the center of it all…and there’s a very just, harrowing and specific reason why he’s seeking him out, at all costs…
…now, setting the wayback machine to…say, about early-to-mid ‘80’s, or so…specifically, back in Cannon Pictures reigning golden era of filmmaking…this budding reviewer and longtime fan of the great Charles Bronson, at the time, was made flashing privy via televised interviews, pictures and printed celebrity rags, of the incredible resemblance of Mr. Bronson, and his striking lookalike stand-in performer. In recalling, it was absolutely uncanny, the resemblance between the two…but for the time, the startling revelation was alas, a fleeting moment, and in all honesty, this cult film fan didn’t get a name, to match the lookalike face…

…some 35 years later…specifically, a couple years ago…along came well under the radar, a trite albeit competent and engaging lil’ western-themed thriller, called “From Hell to the Wild West”. A notable, though negligible lil’ sliver of an exploitation flick, the clever storyline of which speculates what actually happened to Jack the Ripper, once his bloody and murderous reign of terror and death in the dark and murky alleys of Whitechapel, abruptly and mysteriously ceased in the late 1800’s. However, given the film’s poster art and home video cover art, it wasn’t as much the interesting storyline that stood out…but the striking-in-appearance casting of Hungarian-hailed actor Robert Kovacs Bronzi, as a determined old west lawman, on the hunt for a ruthless and bloodthirsty serial killer, plaguing the local prairie townships…

…so now, we have a name to a rather strikingly familiar face…
…2018’s ”Death Kiss”…Robert Bronzi’s second feature film, and the second of four films to date…despite not having any solid, or even outright original substance or storyline, save for the typical and stereotyped ‘cold-hearted vigilante’ movie genre standards, similar to those set forth by the likes and dynamics of late great Charles Bronson, back in his ‘Death Wish’ days…surprisingly enough, under the able direction of up & coming schlock director Rene Perez, plays out as sort of an offshoot of a Paul Kersey-like character’s nocturnal and lawless homicidal mayhem…kinda like ol’ Paul was in the midst of one of his typically ‘blow ‘em away with extreme prejudice’ vigilante rampages, when something ‘offscreen’ went drastically awry enough to instill the need for taking care of this lil’ sideline thing, before getting back to business…with we, the viewers, being fortunate witness privy to that abrupt detour…
…really, in melding movie fantasy with reality…when the final ‘Death Wish’ film credits scrolled down the screen, surely you would think that Paul Kersey himself couldn’t have taken a breather from his bang-bang, sole justice driven shenanigans…impatiently waiting until that next sequel flashed it’s opening title card?? (…uh, I think not…clearly, the man’s got better things to do, if you know what I mean…with the lasting hint of righteously rampant blood spray, followed by a flashing whiff of bullet cartridge sulfur)…
…but despite the generic ‘Death Wish’ like, cookie-cutter action and generic storyline clock works offered herein…well dammit, there’s just no looking away from how damn freaking ‘is it real or is it Memorex/not the Beatles, but an incredible simulation’ striking it is, in seeing ‘Charles Bronson’ back on the screen, even though it’s not actually ‘the man’ himself. In effect, actor Robert Bronzi has offered up a clearly exploitative opportunist gimmick, but at the same time, it seems a loving and respectful tribute to an urban action star, long missed by fans…

…rounding out the cast…Eva Hamilton is quite vulnerable, relatable and  sympathetic as Anna, a perceptive waif of a gal who not only instigated an abrupt move to the serene countryside, in a desperate effort to get away from the violently cold, cruel and heartless city streets, as well as provide a much more stable and loving family life for her daughter…a tragic victim of those cold and hardened streets…but also in hopes of finding penance for the tainted life she once led…a life that has instilled overwhelming guilt in Ana’s heart, in believing that the mistakes and misgivings of this past life were indirectly responsible for her daughter’s invalid condition…
…cast in the role of an angst radio talk show host (…in a sort of slightly ironic years-later performance which indirectly reflects back to his brother Alec’s supporting character play, in 1988’s ‘Talk Radio’), Daniel Baldwin chimes in, playing a sort of supportive over-the-air mouthpiece to Robert Bronzi’s/the stranger’s deadly nocturnal vengeance, deftly putting into words what violently drastic actions this righteously lawless ‘champion’ is engaging in, and the effects of those actions on the city populous...and truth be known, he may well have a personally informed connection with this dark instigator of private justice…
…Richard Tyson…one of the busiest, albeit very underappreciated character actors working today (…good gawd!! Is that…it that actually Buddy Revell, from 1987’s “Three o’clock High”??)…completes this associated circle of characters, retching out a colorful, though typically cold, hard criminal type…perverse and sadistic…who finds himself the invariable target of an equally cold and hard vigilante, without knowing in the onset why he’s being targeted…but of course, if there’s any truth or routine to films of this particular genre…well, he will know, and he will pay…
…”Death Kiss” may well be short on substance, but it makes up for it’s stunted fervor, in favor of some nicely standard character play, as well as an interestingly woven, albeit threadbare storyline, which does attain a moderately satisfying revelation in the end. It’s a low-rent ‘cliff notes’ variation on the old Charles Bronson ‘Death Wish’ motif, that’s engaging enough to warrant more than just a mere curious look, and…yeah, we’re beating a dead horse here…but damn, there’s just no getting over that freakin’ resemblance of Bronzi’s character…over and above merely being played by the numbers, using the exploitative Bronson template…
…might there be a respectable amount of sustainable life and staying power in this gimmick?? Hey, Bronson-sploitation, anyone?? Eh, could be…ah hell, why not, right??.....


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