IT’S JUST A GAME (2018) Movie Review

I know nothing about this movie. I know nothing about the writer/director, the cast, the production company, etc. But I saw it at the Flashback convention on a table at the HSPPA booth (Horror & SciFi Prop Preservation Association) offering it to anyone passing by for free. Naturally, being a cheap ass, I picked it up. And after seeing the name of one of the actors on the cover, someone who shares my maiden name, I felt obligated to take it and give it a shot.

I doubt they are any relation to me but what the hell. Seems like the universe wanted me to watch it. So here we go with 2018’s It’s Just a Game.

(As this is relatively new, I will do my best not to spoil any plot points)

 

The flick opens with a quartet of teenage girls having a slumber party. Get your minds out of the gutter, pervs. Not THAT kind of slumber party. They gossip, they play one of those silly ghost games (like Bloody Mary) that, naturally, doesn’t work. It’s just a set up to scare someone. After talking about a bunch of urban legends, they convince the mousy quiet girl, Brianna, to summon Mother Murder – the soul of a long dead witch who was banished to the land of lost souls.

Again, this is just a scare set up by the main mean girl, Claire. She’s the only one laughing so Brianna and Ruby decide to bounce, Ruby inviting Brianna to stay at her house for the rest of the night. Unfortunately, they run into Claire the next day who is STILL a total bitch, making fun of Brianna for her parents committing suicide.

I mean….jeebus ass crackers, Claire.

Brianna runs home and actually tries to summon Mother Murder again, because if you get it right, Mother will grant you any wish. And Bri wants Claire dead.

Typical teenage girl drama.

What Brianna doesn’t realize is that the spell DID work. Mother Murder comes to Brianna in her sleep and gets her to make that wish. Once that happens, all hell breaks loose (literally) as the members of a cult who worship Mother Murder, and want to bring her back into a physical form, come out of the woodwork and make the young teen’s wish come true.

Exactly how many people will die who stand in the way of Mother Murder and her desire to come back and wreak vengeance upon all those who have wronged her?

 

For an indie horror movie, I have to say this wasn’t as bad as I was expecting. That’s probably unfair of me most of the time but you have to admit, A SHIT TON of independent films suck major donkey dick. Can’t blame a girl for being gun shy.

The majority of the acting is lackluster but the actress playing Brianna (Hannah Cohen-Lawler) completely surprised me. Like a pro, she carried every scene she was in. Leah Hudspeth as Amelia was a close second, followed by Sarah Kopkin as Ruby. All three of them played sympathetic characters, though Leah’s Amelia had that extra psychotic flavor to her. Everyone else was just okay…you could see the actor, not the character they played.

I’ve never seen any other works by the writer/director, Daniel Emery Taylor. While the more supernatural urban legend story bits were the most interesting, the rest of the film was filled with  pretty standard horror tropes. But again, for an indie film, I gotta hand it to Daniel for getting some good stuff to the final product.

That said, however…

One of the biggest issues I had was with the audio. Most of the time it was perfectly balanced. But at the most crucial points, let’s say when a few characters are explaining the backstories or important plot points, the music was crushing the actors’ vocals. To this day I have no idea who Skull Girl is, why she can’t or won’t talk, how this damn cult got started, half of Ruby’s sister’s dialogue at the record store, why Thaddeus will back up Skull Girl no matter what, and more.

If the music were any good, which it really isn’t – kinda like eighties punk pop wanna be pretending to be Birthday Massacre -  I’d still be mad because I want to know what’s going on in the film. The background music (ambient, setting the mood, etc.) should be IN THE BACKGROUND.

The other problem I had was with the long winded philosophising of Mother Murder when she shows herself to Brianna. I can only assume she was explaining her back story and what she’ll do when she manifests into physical form. But don’t fucking ask me because, along with music, the vocal echo effects put on the actress’s voice made it nearly impossible to understand her. If it was a short sentence or two, it wouldn’t have been an issue. But this bitch went on and on and on and on and completely lost me about one quarter of the way into her speech.

All of that, and the completely left turn ending (as in introducing new names and characters without any explanation, that I could hear anyway), left me disappointed. While I do hope that Hannah Cohen-Lawler, Leah Hudspeth, and Sarah Kopkin continue to act, I hope they find more worthy vehicles of their talents.

 

1.75 hatchets (out of 5) 

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Movie Review: SX_Tape (2012; Well Go USA)

...the pursuit, and subsequent taking on of yet another entry, from a tired, repetitive, well-worn and now-way-too-often emulated sub-genre, seems...well, seems synonymously not unlike that of the tired meanderings and lamentations of a certain well-known commercial pastry proprietor...you remember this guy, right?? Up at the wee hours of the morning. dragging his feet out of the bedroom and into the bathroom...murmuring an unenthusiastic groan of "gotta make the donuts"...slowly slogging his way out the front door, and into his car..."gotta make the donuts"...a lethargic, waddling shuffle through the front door of the shop..."gotta make the donuts". Day in, and day out...same old, same old, right??...

...indeed, a comparative and poignant template, not that far removed from applicably describing the readied expectations and ho-hum routine one must endure, in going into yet another supernatural and/or paranormal-themed 'found footage' film production. We've seen them all, right?? Oh, heck...Mickey Mouse roll call, sound off now: ...the shaky, nausea-inducing camera work. The film's singularly assigned or assumed camera operator, barely seen in the film, but insistent upon having the camera affixed to his or her face, to catch every moment, whether important or trivial. The token complainer, often the aim and focus of the camera operator, whining incisively about "why do you have to film this??", "do you have to film everything", and yet, still insistent upon being the 'director', with a pointed finger, saying 'film this', 'film that', and the occasional slinky, sexy, sultry and revealing 'uh, film this'...not to mention the wayward 'did you see/hear that??', only to reveal that it's nothing...right before something does happen. The random inner-splicing of personal footage, amidst the 'discovered' footage of intent, suggesting that the camera operator just grabbed the nearest tape in a huff, little realizing that there was 'personal stuff' already on it (...what, no Radio Shack, on route to the ghostly scene?). And of course, the reveal of the nasty little invasive supernatural entity...playfully and mysteriously moving things, at first...then, progressively frustrated and angered, either materializing at the most impromptu moments, or possessing the nearest hapless person within reach, giving the cautious voyeurs a hard time, and rushing suddenly  & frighteningly face-first into the camera lens...all creeped out, ghastly-looking, unnervingly black-eyeballed and hideously toothsome. Uh, did we forget anything??...

Movie Review: Sadako 3D (2012, Blu-ray)

Review By: Rob Sibley

If I learned anything over the years of watching dozens of J-horror films, it's that you can't keep a good ghost girl down. The most interesting thing about Sadako 3D is it's not a sequel to Ring 2. This is actually the “official” sequel to “Rasen”. If Rasen doesn't sound familiar let's do a quick history lessen shall we?

Rasen was originally intended to be the sequel to Ring 2, it was based of the novel “Spiral” by Koji Suzuki. A very prolific J-horror author who also penned the original novels for Ring, Spiral and Dark Water. His short story “Dream Cruise” was adapted into an excellent episode of the short lived Masters of horror series on showtime. Now The Ring & Rasen were both released in Japan at the same time but the thing is The Ring did box office bank. But Rasen bombed, so producers pretty much ignored the film and made The Ring 2. So the film became forgotten. 

Movie Review: The Life After Death Project (2013, Yellow Hat Productions)

...funny how the strangest of incidents in one's life, drive one towards the strangest of directions...and in the interim, the determinant wrought of that unswerving drive proves pretty much negligible and unrevealing, albeit resignedly procuring a level of speculation which has long since become 'air of mystery' commonplace amongst those privy of the seemingly paranormal and supernatural 'unexplained'. Point in case: An inexplicable and unexplained ink smudge on a piece of paper...a smudge, blotting out some words, which reportedly was not there, when writer/director Paul Davids place the paper down, and walked away from it, for only a moment. Amusingly enough, given certain parables in this particular incident, Paul eventually concluded that the mysterious paper smudge, considering what the smudge was blotting out, was a 'message' from beyond the grave...from none other than genre philanthropist and once-magazine publisher Forrest J. Ackerman...yes, THE Forrest J. Ackerman, of the renowned horror/sci-fi/fantasy publication, which the more seasoned of us grew up with, namely 'Famous Monsters of Filmland', who regrettably passed away some five years previous. In the end, Paul Davids wound up engaging a pursuant study of the paranormal, porting the resources of experts and celebrities, in a chronicle he would moniker as "The Life After Death Project"...which again, in the final analysis, really doesn't provide any answers, per say...merely, that often explored air of speculation and mystery amongst an exclusive fold of 'believers', with shared experiences in ghostly matters...and at the very least, it proves an arcane glimpse at an endearing look at a famed genre celebrity, who according to those who reportedly bore witness to 'strange, bizarre and inexplicable' incidents, is amusingly guilty of carrying on his trademark impish personality...from beyond the grave...

Movie Review: Black Sabbath (1963, Blu-ray/DVD combo pack)

Review By: Rob Sibley

  Mario Bava is the king of Italian horror, plain and simple. Don't get me wrong I am obsessed with Italian masters of horror. Dario Argento, Lucio Fulchi, Umberto Lenzi, Sergio Martino, Luigi Cozzi and Pupi Avati all are brilliant filmmakers. But Bava was special... some may call his films old fashioned. If by old fashioned you meant classy I'd agree. Bava single handily created the Giallo genre and at the same time (to me) did the first true slasher film with Bay of Blood. A film which was ripped off more times then I can count. Let's just say you wouldn't have Friday the 13^th 1 or 2 without Bay. You wouldn't have all the great early Giallo's from Argento if it wasn't for The Girl who knew too much and Blood and Black Lace.

Bava was ahead of his time, other filmmakers were just playing catch up. He was a man of many talents, not only an excellent director but a phenomenal cinematographer and writer. Look at “Hatchet For the Honeymoon” and tell me Brett Easton Ellis wasn't inspired by it for American Psycho. Bava didn't always just make horror films. He directed the criminally underrated epic “Hercules: In The Haunted World” and the Viking epic Erik The Conqueror. He also wasn't afraid to add humor to his films. His films often were filled with irony and pitch black humor.

Movie Review: A Haunting at Silver Falls (2013, Outsider Pictures)

...ya' know, one really has to wonder, just what is it about lingeringly restless and supposedly 'wronged' ghosts & specters...in particular, those of the cinematic fervor...and their ethereal and other-worldly stasis, forcibly tethered in this world...a torturous limbo...still managing to take with them, a wholly human, demandantly unswerving, relentlessly unforgiving and self-serving sense of justice and purpose?? Supposed 'unfinished business', as often coined...hauntingly insistent upon commanding the attention of the living, despite their limited and handicapped ability to fully communicate, and yet able to exude frustration, anger, rage and fury...sometimes physically...when those whom they are haunting, just can't seem to get the message, right from the get-go. And what about those haplessly haunted...forced to delve into uncertain mystery and intrigue...sometimes getting in way over their heads...in an effort to appease the haunting spirit, invariably plaguing them...

...come on, 'dead' people (...clap, clap); wake up and smell the afterlife...Let's get on with it, huh!!