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December 19, 2025

Camp Blood Christmas - Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

So, when I heard there was a movie that brought David C. Hayes out of (acting) retirement, you bet your SWEET ASS that I was going to see it no matter the cost. Luckily for me, David is my friend, and he obviously considers me the same because he brought me a copy of it, Blu Ray no less, when it became available.

And just in time for Christmas, here is my review of the 2025 film, Camp Blood Christmas.

NOTE: I won’t be spoiling any plot points as this film LITERALLY just came out. People need to experience this film on their own terms.

The basic idea is this: a group of misfits answers a job ad for a new Santa Snow Camp, a winter excursion place for kids to enjoy winter and Santa Clause and all that crap. Aside from the delay of the food and supplies guy, Carl, everything seems to be going swimmingly. But then, Gary, the hired Santa Clause, shares the bloody massacre-prone history of the location of the new camp.

Turns out it was a regular camp at one time until there were a bunch murders committed by the Clown Killer.

Fun fact: the opening credits consist of snippets from many of the previous fourteen Camp Blood movies.

You heard me. FOUR-FUCKING-TEEN. (Depending on who you talk to, it could only be fourteen total films which means snippets from THIR-FUCKING-TEEN films fill the opening credits.)

Anyway, as you might imagine, the reason Carl never showed? Seems the Clown Killer has returned. But what you might not have imagined, is the reason WHY. Whoa, PLOT TWIST! But then you probably didn’t image ANOTHER twist on top of that. It’s like the villain neck-cracking the hero right before he can save the day!

Will anyone survive this rampage? Maybe.

Will this family camp every get off the ground? Probably not.

Will we care?

Now, we all know how indie horror films usually go, don’t we? Low budget, lackluster acting, minimal continuity, terrible editing, bad sound, ridiculous plots and their giant holes, and so on and so forth. And, generally speaking, this is consistent with those issues – except sound. This is probably the first indie film I’ve watched where I didn’t need to keep adjusting the volume throughout the whole fucking thing because the dialogue was too quiet and the effects were too loud.

Good job, guys!

But yet, other than the great sound, this films lacks a lot. Character development is minimal because honestly, I really only cared about the hitch hiking, bearded, gummy dosing happy dude, Eddie (I think that’s him). Everyone else? Eh. A lot of the jokes fell flat; the dialogue felt stilted and unnatural; and way too much time was spent filming David’s butt crack.

HOWEVER…

Quite a few of the jokes landed perfectly. I personally loved the ditzy bombshell taking nudes of “down there” with her landline phone to send to her boyfriend. The story itself is pretty fun. While I will say some of the dialogue actually tells us what’s coming, the reveals and twists felt totally unexpected. The practical effects looked good (way to go, Emily Sammons, for the design on the severed penis). And it was easy to tell everyone who worked on the movie had good chemistry. They put in a lot of effort and while not perfect, it really shows their dedication.

Matt Dilts-Williams did a great job at writing a fun and entertaining story, as well as directing the cast and crew.

So if you’re interested in seeing what’s happening in the indie scene, and wouldn’t mind taking a chance on a humorous holiday horror – and David’s butt crack – get yourself a copy of Camp Blood Christmas. Don’t forget to hang around through the ending credits. That final song is pretty dang catchy.

And have a hell of a happy holiday season!

3 hatchets (out of 5)

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June 29, 2025

Let Us In (2022) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

In October 2024, I believe I met the writer/director of an indie horror flick that was filmed right here in Michigan. I said I’d be happy to review it for CHC and now, nearly nine months later, I’m finally getting around to it.

I am so sorry I’m a lazy asshole, Anthony!

Anyway, let’s get to it! I’ll try not to spoil anything as it’s a relatively new film and someone out there might not have had the chance to see it yet.

Personally, that might be for the best…

Let Us In is basically some kind of zombie film that takes place in the middle of petty squabbles between rival motorcycle gangs. The film jumps around a lot between the gang members, some guy hiding out in NOT his house with a sick wife, a random dude whose car breaks down, and some chick who…I don’t even know her fucking issue.

Their storylines eventually cross, leaving a lot of blood and violence on the front lawn for the hazmat team to clean up.

That’s about it. There’s not a lot of depth going on in this movie. I admit Anthony tried to make a more interesting flick than just your standard zombie trope-filled celluloid. It could have worked if the sound was even, or if the acting was better, or the special effects looked more convincing, or it made any sense at all.

The story arc jumping was too much. Each character group/story had about two minutes of screen time – if we were lucky – before switching to another. It’s mostly difficult to keep track of the story because the audio is absolute GARBAGE. Maybe that’s why the opening title screen says, “This film should be played LOUD!”

Fuck my life…

The “special f/x” are pretty bad, which is not uncommon for indie horror. But when the neck flap of the mask is clearly visible on the zombie, and there aren’t more guts on a victim after a chainsaw attack, it makes it a little difficult to become immersed in the action.

But I have to say the most implausible scene that really pissed me off was a character with a SHOTGUN acquiesced to a character with a CHAINSAW who threatened to saw off their hands if they didn’t put the gun down. I mean, what the actual fuck? He’s standing two feet away from you. Blow that fucking asshole’s head off and move on.

*ahem*

Anyway…

It’s not a total loss here. The film is only 57 minutes, which helps a great deal, even if some of it feels like filler to pad the run time. And while character development was obviously not a priority here (the biker chick, Meg, was introduced via her bare tits and I don’t think she had any dialogue at all) the character of Chris is actually kinda fun. He’s got a fight scene with a zombie that pretty fucking cool. I’m not sure if he’s supposed to be some kind of bad ass or former Green Beret but I’d believe it if that was the explanation for his bad-assery.

Also some of the cinematography is great. Many of the shots needed to convey that sense of emptiness that comes with a global infectious event and this flick delivered where needed.

They did put out a goofy gimmick with the movie, a la William Castle. Barf bags were included inside the DVD case. I wouldn’t say this movie had that much gore in it but I get the idea behind it. Nice little throwback to the tamer days of horror presentation.

Adorbs

While I wouldn’t recommend this film at all, I won’t judge anyone who’d like to support Anthony and any of his future projects. I think there’s a lot of potential there. Maybe not the next Tarantino or Roth, but it might be fun to see where he goes from here.

1 hatchet (out of 5)

I have no links or site where you can get this flick so if you're really interested, maybe email or call Anthony!

December 15, 2024

Christmas Capsule Reviews 2024 - Part II

Posted by PeggyC

Well, holy shit, I’m actually getting to the second installment of my Christmas Horror movie capsule reviews just a week after my first post. Who fucking knew I could get it together and actually be productive?

Part Two will cover the offerings of Amazon Prime.

Secret Santa 2018
A tense family get together for the Christmas holiday gets ugly. Someone has taken revenge on all the attendees and someone has to figure out what the hell is going on and stop it before they’re all taken down.

While Robert Kurtzman did the practical f/x for this flick (and they were pretty glorious), the blood spray was CGI and awful. The acting was what you might expect (aka not good) and the humor missed more often than hit. Interesting premise but the execution fell short, mostly because every character was a douchebag and we don’t give a shit what happens to them.

The Christmas Carol (narrated by V. Price) 1949
It’s a live action short film of the tale but Price narrates it. FUCKING GENIUS. It’s only 25 minutes, and that include the opening exposition from Price! Nice introduction to the tale if you or someone you know has never heard it or watched any film adaptation of it.

Did I mention Vincent Price? ‘Nuf said.

Christmassacre (2015) (AKA Secret Santa)
College kids throw a Secret Santa holiday party during finals at school. They don’t know a killer is on the loose with a very special list and murderous presents to dole out.

The longer this movie went on, the more I thought that I had already seen it. Possibly at a party a couple years earlier. But that’s ok. I already took notes, so I’ll just tell you what I think.

The practical effects are fun (the eye ball on the drill bit was a particular favorite). I think they put a filter on the film itself because it looked like a dirty print, giving it that 80s feel. The only character I really enjoyed was Dwayne - just a goofy awkward guy. But fun. The kills are good and the killers (SPOILER ALERT) ended up making me laugh. So I was pretty entertained.

Werewolf Santa 2023
Santa is bitten by a werewolf on Christmas Eve. And now internet blogger, Lucy, and her family set out to save Christmas

I mean…I only watched this for an update to a werewolf encyclopedia I’m helping with so do NOT at me.
The best thing about this movie was that JoeBob Briggs does the introduction, in cartoon form no less. But the rest of it feels pretty lackluster. Acting is awful but the British accents are a little difficult for me to understand, mostly because the audio is a bit muffled, and the actress who played Lucy mumbles A LOT. The characters are neither special nor very likable. And the film kept utilizing title cards to tell us what was happening. Not sure if that was a budgetary issues or lack of imagination to show it. Oh well. The practical effects are fun, though.

Santa Jaws 2018
Cody has a special pen that, whatever he draws, becomes real. He draws a Santa Shark that comes to life and starts killing his family and friends.

I really enjoyed the story on this one. Cody is a good character to get behind (you know, for a teenager). All the acting is actually decent, and really just the Mom character is awful enough to hate. The CGI effects are so bad they’re entertaining, and the deaths by Santa Jaws are funny as hell. Overall not a terrible little indie horror.

Let’s Kill Grandpa This Christmas 2017
A down on his luck pushover is lured into a plot to kill his wife’s grandfather on Christmas.

Average indie horror comedy. Lots of tropes and characters. While Gramp’s family wants him dead, I’m not sure why. He’s a hoot. Overall the film was fine, but it was a slog to get through to the end.

ALSO AVAILABLE (probably not a complete list but I got tired of looking):

All Through the House
Jack Frost (not THAT one) (or THAT one)
Holiday Hell
Krampus Origins
Deathcemeber
Mother Krampus
Jack Frost (THAT one)
Secret Santa
Rare Exports
13 Slay til Christmas

Silent Night, Deadly Night 2

Stay tuned for the final installment next week!

June 7, 2024

Bathtub Shark Attack (2023) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

If anyone remembers, about a year ago I reviewed an indie horror movie called Spirit Animal. Brought to us by Nekroshark Films, writer/director Madeline Deering has done it again with today’s review offering, Bathtub Shark Attack.

Yes, you read that correctly.

By the time I get to the end of the review, I’m sure I’ll have figured out exactly how I feel about this flick. But for now, let’s get into some details.

The basic premise of this one is about a down-on-their-luck couple who moves into a really cheap apartment, something that seems to good to be true. And you’d be right. Because the caveat here is a creature lurking in the pipes that demands flesh and blood!

Pretty straight forward, right? I don’t want to spoil too much of the plot since it just came out last year. And since it’s an indie film, it might take a little longer to get distributed beyond its native Pennsylvania and Ohio where I was able to get a copy (thanks for grabbing one, Jeff, while I worked the table with David at Cinema Wasteland.)

If I remember correctly, Spirit Animal opened with the rando bartender breaking the fourth wall to tell us about the movie. Guess what? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it because he’s back. He explains the tape; he explains the premise; and, again, he tells us about the game you have to play when watching with friends. Since the movie was shot in “Splash-o-Vision” every time a shark picture pops up on screen, shoot your fellow movie watchers with the squirt gun you got with the movie.

I watched a bit of the Indie-Go-Go promo in the Special Features section of the DVD and Madeline explains that they wanted to make the GORIEST shark film ever. I wasn’t so sure about that until we get to the final scene. But I’m not about to relive that moment so you’ll have to get the DVD and witness it yourself.

Lush just released their new Halloween bath bomb!

I have to say, there are GALLONS of blood sloshing around in this movie. There are probably a minimum of a dozen kills that involve some body part being bitten off, crushed in (with a toilet plunger no less), run through either by glass shards or projectiles. This doesn’t count the half a dozen characters who were electrocuted! And while, perhaps, the f/x weren’t super polished, I always appreciate practical rubber and corn syrup over trash CGI any day.

And Madeline certainly delivered! The blood, not the shit CGI.

The story itself is pretty standard as far as horror tropes go. Evil cult, immortal monster, virgin sacrifice, etc. And I appreciate that Madeline knows how to build a story, piece by piece, so we’re guessing what’s going to happen next (or trying to puzzle it out along the way). I’m not saying there weren’t parts I’d figured out right off the bat, but despite some general lagging in the middle, I liked the set-up, development, and climax of the story.

The one problem I had was trying to figure out when this movie is supposed to be taking place. There were a lot of nineties references (Melrose Place, the Nintendo gaming system the stoners used) but Chad references his record store job and how everyone wants cassettes now, not vinyl. Which would be the eighties. Also the woman in the beginning had a rotary phone which basically went out of fashion in the seventies and eighties…

SEE, THESE KIND OF INCONSISTENCIES DERAIL MY ENJOYMENT!

Anyway…

The character development felt a little lax but if they wanted to make this the goriest shark film ever, you’re gonna need a lot of cannon fodder and the audience can’t care about cannon fodder, amirite? While the acting was not good, I did find myself rooting for Chad and Bill the Plumber. In fact, there’s a scene between them where, after the power goes out in the building, Bill is dumbfounded by the fuse box and when Chad unintentionally sneaks up on him, they both do this pretend kung-fu dance that actually made me pause the DVD because I was laughing pretty hard.

How many times do I have to tell you NO GARLIC before lovey dovey time?

In fact, I think I did all my laughing at the scenes with Chad and Bill – not always together, though. Each character had his amusing moments. Probably the best with Bill was the epic fight scene with the cult near the end, and Chad jerking off with his right hand while he worked a Shake Weight in his left.

I do have to mention, though, for an indie horror, there was a particular LACK of titty shots. And I’m not complaining! It’s a rather tired trope so to only have a couple was rather refreshing. Hey, I get why they’re popular and why people demand them. But it was nice to see a writer/director do things a little differently for a change.

But if you want gratuitous nudity, there is an extreme close up of some lady bits at the end (again, I’m not going to describe it any more than that for reasons that will become clear if you watch the movie) and some shark dick. So…

I will spoil one thing for you. The number of times you’re supposed to squirt your friends with a water pistol (that I caught anyway): seventeen. I say turn that into a different party game and make it like going to a Japanese hibachi grill. Fill those guns with sake and the person you aim at has to drink!

So while this is not one of the better indie films I’ve seen, I have to say Madeline stepped up her game and delivered a solid horror comedy. Maybe not worth multiple watches but I’m not mad at the time I spent watching it.

3 hatchets (out of 5)

August 22, 2023

IT’S JUST A GAME (2018) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

I know nothing about this movie. I know nothing about the writer/director, the cast, the production company, etc. But I saw it at the Flashback convention on a table at the HSPPA booth (Horror & SciFi Prop Preservation Association) offering it to anyone passing by for free. Naturally, being a cheap ass, I picked it up. And after seeing the name of one of the actors on the cover, someone who shares my maiden name, I felt obligated to take it and give it a shot.

I doubt they are any relation to me but what the hell. Seems like the universe wanted me to watch it. So here we go with 2018’s It’s Just a Game.

(As this is relatively new, I will do my best not to spoil any plot points)

The flick opens with a quartet of teenage girls having a slumber party. Get your minds out of the gutter, pervs. Not THAT kind of slumber party. They gossip, they play one of those silly ghost games (like Bloody Mary) that, naturally, doesn’t work. It’s just a set up to scare someone. After talking about a bunch of urban legends, they convince the mousy quiet girl, Brianna, to summon Mother Murder – the soul of a long dead witch who was banished to the land of lost souls.

Again, this is just a scare set up by the main mean girl, Claire. She’s the only one laughing so Brianna and Ruby decide to bounce, Ruby inviting Brianna to stay at her house for the rest of the night. Unfortunately, they run into Claire the next day who is STILL a total bitch, making fun of Brianna for her parents committing suicide.

I mean….jeebus ass crackers, Claire.

Brianna runs home and actually tries to summon Mother Murder again, because if you get it right, Mother will grant you any wish. And Bri wants Claire dead.

Typical teenage girl drama.

What Brianna doesn’t realize is that the spell DID work. Mother Murder comes to Brianna in her sleep and gets her to make that wish. Once that happens, all hell breaks loose (literally) as the members of a cult who worship Mother Murder, and want to bring her back into a physical form, come out of the woodwork and make the young teen’s wish come true.

Exactly how many people will die who stand in the way of Mother Murder and her desire to come back and wreak vengeance upon all those who have wronged her?

For an indie horror movie, I have to say this wasn’t as bad as I was expecting. That’s probably unfair of me most of the time but you have to admit, A SHIT TON of independent films suck major donkey dick. Can’t blame a girl for being gun shy.

The majority of the acting is lackluster but the actress playing Brianna (Hannah Cohen-Lawler) completely surprised me. Like a pro, she carried every scene she was in. Leah Hudspeth as Amelia was a close second, followed by Sarah Kopkin as Ruby. All three of them played sympathetic characters, though Leah’s Amelia had that extra psychotic flavor to her. Everyone else was just okay…you could see the actor, not the character they played.

I’ve never seen any other works by the writer/director, Daniel Emery Taylor. While the more supernatural urban legend story bits were the most interesting, the rest of the film was filled with pretty standard horror tropes. But again, for an indie film, I gotta hand it to Daniel for getting some good stuff to the final product.

That said, however…

One of the biggest issues I had was with the audio. Most of the time it was perfectly balanced. But at the most crucial points, let’s say when a few characters are explaining the backstories or important plot points, the music was crushing the actors’ vocals. To this day I have no idea who Skull Girl is, why she can’t or won’t talk, how this damn cult got started, half of Ruby’s sister’s dialogue at the record store, why Thaddeus will back up Skull Girl no matter what, and more.

If the music were any good, which it really isn’t – kinda like eighties punk pop wanna be pretending to be Birthday Massacre - I’d still be mad because I want to know what’s going on in the film. The background music (ambient, setting the mood, etc.) should be IN THE BACKGROUND.

The other problem I had was with the long winded philosophising of Mother Murder when she shows herself to Brianna. I can only assume she was explaining her back story and what she’ll do when she manifests into physical form. But don’t fucking ask me because, along with music, the vocal echo effects put on the actress’s voice made it nearly impossible to understand her. If it was a short sentence or two, it wouldn’t have been an issue. But this bitch went on and on and on and on and completely lost me about one quarter of the way into her speech.

All of that, and the completely left turn ending (as in introducing new names and characters without any explanation, that I could hear anyway), left me disappointed. While I do hope that Hannah Cohen-Lawler, Leah Hudspeth, and Sarah Kopkin continue to act, I hope they find more worthy vehicles of their talents.

1.75 hatchets (out of 5)

December 21, 2022

Giftwrapped and Gutted (2019) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

Yeah, I suck as a movie reviewer. At least in 2022. So let’s get some holiday-themed trash on the site and try harder for 2023.

Good? Good.

It only seems fitting to present some absolute crap for my first movie review since…February. Dayum. 2019’s Giftwrapped and Gutted comes to us from W.A.V.E. Productions but probably should have been flushed directly down the toilet instead of released into the world. Mall Santa Chuck is fired for too much drinking on the job. And instead of taking a hint and cleaning up his act, he uses this opportunity to stalk and kill a bunch of local waitresses, and wet t-shirt hotties, from him favorite watering hole.

I know. I don’t get it either but here we are.

But wait! Before this story gets going, we are treated to a movie within the movie. The opening few minutes are of another shitty Christmas horror movie playing on Chuck’s boss’s office tv. Whining about why these terrible films keep being made the manager THEN decides to fire Chuck.

By the way, the Manager is played by the writer/director/fx/editing/cinematography/producer guy for Giftwrapped and Gutted, Gary Whitson.

Wow, that’s sooooo meta.

Anyhoo, Chuck sulks home where he is berated by his nagging wife. He snaps and hog ties her with some Christmas lights. Somehow she manages to choke herself to death while struggling to get out of her binding, which pleases Chuck to no end, and he’s off to kill some titty women.

The only other important details….well, maybe not ‘important’ but at least give us some inkling of the life ending asbestos plot fibers…are the waitresses are having a party at Holly’s house and then murdered one by one. There is one survivor but I won’t spoil it for you.

FUCK ME…..

I mean, when I find movies to review for CHC, I don’t expect great. I hardly expect good. But I do expect to be entertained. And kids, this is NOT the film for that. I’ve never seen a W.A.V.E. production before but from what I’ve been told, and from the title sequences alone, I can sus out what they like to bring to the table. Mostly bondage and strangling. And nips.

Let’s get all the bad out of the way first. Needless to say, but I will, all the terrible things in this flick are below (this is by no means a complete list):

· Acting

· Directing

· Writing

· Character development

· Casting

· Production

· Cinematography

· Set design

· Green Screen

· Special Effects

· Sound

· Lighting

· Music

· Entertainment value

I mean, you know it’s super low budget when two actresses are used to play two different sets of twins (Holly and Polly, Angel and Sage) and one actor plays two characters (Chick the bartender and Stripper Santa). I guess it’s a good use of the $3400 budget but…they really couldn’t find three other people to act the parts – and I use that term, act, VERY loosely.

This film could also have been better as a short. There was AT LEAST 30-40 minutes of padding time filled with inane chatter between the girls at the party, Santa Chuck prepping for murder or dragging out a final kill (if he had fabric scissors, it could have gone faster), victim struggling and whimpering, the whole ‘movie within a movie’ time waste at the start, the wet t-shirt competition, the bobbing for apples scene, etc.

Jesus take the wheel.

Believe it or not, I did appreciate a couple things. While the special effects are total crap, I do prefer practical over CGI. And there was quite a bit of it, in the opening movie clip and the main film itself. There was obvious green screen shit going on but I do like a good skin chew or flow of blood.

And yes, many scenes were padded and dragged out. But to be honest, and maybe they didn’t do this on purpose, strangling someone takes time. It’s not five-seconds of wham, bam, slam, you’re dead. I don’t expect complete realism in my movies all the time but when the rest of the flick is so fucking terrible, it’s refreshing to see this small aspect represented.

Funnily enough, two of the scenes where Chuck strangles someone are both with the actress, Debbie D. As Sage, Chuck garottes her, and as Angel, he manually strangles her. It takes a while for both of them to die. She’s convincingly believable.

But that’s about all I can praise in this shitastic shitshow. I have no intention of ever watching another W.A.V.E. Productions film. But if you’re into terrible awkward acting, wet titties, and bondage, then boy do I have the movie for you.

¼ hatchet (out of 5)

February 28, 2022

TAKE BACK THE NIGHT (2021) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

As I’m beginning to organize my thoughts for this review, I’m sincerely hoping that whatever rolls out of my brain pan to my fingertips doesn’t piss anyone off. I mean if it does, that’s on you, not me. However, I don’t purposefully try to hurt others if I can help it.

The only reason I’m opening with this idea is because the film I’m going to review is an amalgamation of ideas that make a lot of people angry, uncomfortable, insecure, scared, or worst of all, dismissive. So this review may take a more serious tone, perhaps show the more somber side of my psyche. More than likely this will end up long and rambling, so please bear with me.

But always remember – these are just my opinions, my thought processes. I am only speaking FOR MYSELF. So don’t take anything I write as a personal attack against you, other men or women, feminism or feminists, victims of violent crimes, etc.

In other words, don’t be a big, bubble-blowing, narcissistic baby, okay?

Glad we’re cleared that up. On to the review.

Take Back the Night is a 2021 film about Jane Doe, a woman who is assaulted by a supernatural shadow creature. As she tries to move on with her life in the only way she knows how – posting about her experience on social media in the hopes others will share any info on the creature she’s encountered – Jane maneuvers the world of victim blaming and shaming. The less than helpful police detective, the ambush of an ‘investigative journalist’, and the strained relationship with her only sister do not help Jane mentally recover. Only by seeking out the truth and using her well-established sense of self-reliance is Jane finally able to move forward.

I can’t really get much more specific than that because I will reveal important story elements. And while this is not a perfect film, it’s well done and worth the watch, so I don’t want to ruin it for any future viewers.

What is great about this film is the acting. Jane, played by Emma Fitzpatrick, is completely sympathetic, even to those of us who’ve never been the victim of a sexual assault or violent crime. Aside from her instinct to go immediately to social media about everything, my heart was with her all the way. I felt the strain of her relationship with her sister, played by Angela Gulner (who starred in a little-known, awesome indie film called Son of Ghostman); the incredulity of the detective when she went from supportive to hostile; the humiliation of the journalistic ambush on live television. Jane brings the viewer along for the ride on every ugly destination.

The production is top notch. I felt like I was watching a Hollywood blockbuster. Sound, editing, photography; even the CGI used for the shadow creature was completely believable. It helps to have a cadre of great actors, well-developed characters, and a good script. I appreciated the unsanitized elements of what happens after an assault, like the hospital procedures and police questioning. Most of those things are glossed over in tv and movies.

From what I understand, the attack by the shadow creature is supposed to be a metaphor for rape. But let’s be honest here, it’s not that deep of a metaphor. A woman, alone in an alley, is attacked by a stranger. When she ends up in the hospital, she’s covered in bruises, scratches, bite marks, and her lower stomach – you know, right over her womb – has been nearly clawed open. It doesn’t take a huge leap of the intellect to know what’s going on. She’s been raped without saying she’s been raped.

But I understand why they did it this way. Or at least, I think I do. Talking about sexual assault, or any violent crime, makes people uncomfortable. Let’s face it – women have been oppressed, repressed, shamed, blamed, humiliated, victimized, and every other descriptor you can think of for inhumane treatment, for centuries across every culture and society on the planet. I’m sure most women, however, don’t think it will happen to them and most men believe they would never commit such acts. So people just kinda push it to the back burner and don’t talk about it. But…put this in the guise of a horror movie with a supernatural shadow monster and it loosens the lips, so to speak.

I also started looking at the shadow creature as a metaphor, not just for a person but mental illness and its impact on the human condition. It could also be seen as society and how it has treated women until they are worn down into submission, suicide, doubt, weakness, etc. So for me, the supernatural element of the attack is a weaker metaphor than the shadow creature itself.

By the time I got to the end of the movie, I was feeling all kinds of ways. I had questions; I was angry. But you know what I never felt, though? Female empowerment. I have a feeling the film makers wanted that to come across but it either went over my head or focused too much on how everyone was a total fucking asshole, doubting Jane’s story and making her doubt her own experience.

This is what happens in real life, right? Of course it is. Even though Jane survives, perhaps the bleakness of her continued existence is the point, though she’s doing all she can to help herself and others from becoming victims, too. While showing that social media can have positive impacts (Jane can find other women out there to help; she gets useful info on the shadow creature and how to defeat it, etc.), I walked away with the feeling of helplessness; that nothing anyone does or says can change this fucked up way of how women are treated.

I think a big part of that feeling comes from the fact that there are no male characters in this movie. Well, technically there are two: one we only see his back right before Jane has bathroom sex with him and then he’s gone into the ether, and the other is the voice over of the cop conducting Jane’s polygraph test. Removing men from the equation, dismissing they’re conscious or unconscious role in how women are seen and treated in society, is a disservice to their sex and does NOTHING to help women. Absolutely. Nothing. This is the most egregious flaw of this film.

A few years back I watched a YouTube video (sorry, I can’t remember names or channels or anything because my brain retains nothing useful) about a woman who goes to high schools and colleges to talk with young male athletes. She said instead of wagging an accusatory finger at them and screeching “you’re what’s wrong with the world and you should all just go away”, include them in the conversations about rape and violent assaults. If they become more aware of how their actions, or inactions, impact women, as well as develop their sense of empathy (how would you feel if that were your sister, your girlfriend, your mom), perhaps we can change these archaic ideas about women in society, and behave like the evolved species we think we are. I don’t remember if she said that last part – could just be me editorializing.

Overall, this is a well-done film. While I think it failed in some respects, it certainly opens the door for more discourse about societal norms and cultural ideals toward who women are supposed to be, how they should act, and what we can do together to make the world a better place for everyone.

2.75 hatchets (out of 5)

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