Movie Review: Graphic Sexual Horror (2009)

Documentaries are almost always interesting. Sometimes they can help you expand your knowledge on something you already know about, and sometimes they can teach you about something you are ignorant of. Sometimes they tell you stories about people. Graphic Sexual Horror was a little about people and a little about something I really knew nothing about. It was interesting and odd, and it wasn't what I thought it would be.

I'll admit to looking at my share of adult videos on the Internet. Long before sites like YouPorn and Red Tube, you could see clips on sites like Stile Project or Ebaum's World mixed in with Flash cartoons. I'd always get weird things in my inbox from friends, and some of it would be crazy bondage stuff. One of the first websites to capitolize on this was Insex. They took willing models and put them through all kinds of sexual torture and ended up with a large following. They had around 35,000 people paying $60 a month to watch videos and live feeds based on their fetish. That's not a ton of people in the grand scheme of things, but it's enough to qualify as a niche.

Movie Review: Smiley Face (2007)

I'm an Anna Faris fan. I think she's one of the few actresses that can consistently handle comedy. I was happy to see her grab the lead in a few films. Smiley Face is something I heard about for awhile, and I finally sat down and watched. With the way Faris portrayed Jane, a hapless stoner throughout this movie, I could tell she was working from experience.

Buy Smiley Face on DVD

The movie is packed with great actors. You have Danny Masterson as Jane's angry nerd roommate, John Krasinski as his nerd friend who loves Jane, Jane Lynch, Adam Brody, Brian Posehn, Danny Trejo and more in crazy cameos. The story is simple. Jane is stoned, and she has the munchies. She eats cupcakes that she doesn't know are laced. She eats a lot of cupcakes. She is fucked up. There are many things that Jane is supposed to do, but you can guess that there really isn't a chance in hell that any of that is going to happen.

CAMILLE 2000 Seduces The Senses!

Cult Epics Marks their 100th Release with a Gorgeous Restoration of Radley Metzger’s 1969 Erotic Drama, Now Expanded with Extras!

UCLA Film & Television Archive to Honor Metzger in June with Film Retrospective Featuring Seven of the Director’s Finest.

Blu-ray and DVD Versions of Camille 2000 Due Out June 28!

Buy the Blu-ray, Extended Version Blu-ray, DVD, or Extended Version DVD

LOS ANGELES (May 17, 2011) – To celebrate its 100th release, Cult Epics will unveil a newly restored, high-definition transfer of the erotic drama CAMILLE 2000 on June 28. Originally released in 1969, this sensual classic was directed by independent film pioneer Radley Metzger, a master of art house erotica who is acclaimed for his deft combination of opulent production design, exquisite cinematography and edgy themes.

Movie Review: Slices of Life (2010, Brain Damage Films)

Okay, here it goes. I'm about to review the first Brain Damage films release that I didn't hate. What? Is it possible? After my review of The Farm, you wouldn't think so, but here it is. I'm not as opposed to anthologies as some people are. I think they can be a good showcase of short stories. Some are legendary, like Trilogy of Terror, Creepshow and The Twilight Zone. I think they can be fun, and if a story sucks, you only have to wait a few minutes for something new.

Buy Slices of Life on DVD

I'll be clear here. I didn't love this movie. It was okay. There are three stories, and they're all linked together by another story about a girl and her three sketch books. Each of the books, as you can probably guess, represent one of the three stories. The stories can be a little slow at times, but that's not far off from many episodes of shows like The Outer Limits or Fear Itself. Those shows have their merits, but they did drag sometimes. I was never a big fan of either, but I'd sit and watch The Outer Limits on a Sunday afternoon on channel 32 back in Chicago more than a decade ago. It was something to do, and you'd get an interesting story now and again. Slices of Life was good enough to be three episodes of that show.

Movie Review: Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers and Halloween H20: 20 Years Later - Double Feature (Blu-ray)

About a month or so ago there came news that Echo Bridge Entertainment was distributing certain Dimension Films titles. Two of those titles, Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers and Halloween: H20 have been bundled up into a double feature release for the Blu-ray market. Before I go too much further in my review of the disc I'd like to warn anyone who has not seen Halloween H20: 20 Years Later that there is a spoiler involving LL Cool J. It's tiny, but a spoiler nonetheless. Now off to Haddonfield!

Buy Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers / Halloween H20: Twenty Years Later (Miramax Double Feature) [Blu-ray]

For the most part I really think both films are "middle of the pack" Halloween films. Neither are as bad as Rob Zombie's trash, but neither are as entertaining as the original, part II or Season of the Witch. In "Curse", Tommy Doyle (Paul Rudd) is a Michael Myers-aholic who really wants to track down the legendary killer from Haddonfield. Dr Loomis (Donald Pleasence) is still kickin' but he's retired.. that is until the possibility of Michael stalking again becomes a reality.

Cinema Head Cheese: The Podcast! #8 presents Review Mania

It's late, but it's finally here! Damned technology!

Kevin Moyers and Jeff Dolniak get together via phone for a review filled evening. They discuss movies, television and enchiladas. They also get into this month's Trade-off, in which Jeff had to listen to one of Kevin's favorite podcasts, and Kevin had to watch a terrible porn parody.

Lacey Paige also shares her thoughts on the latest addition to the Scream franchise.

Click here to listen or right click and choose "Save Link As..." to download.

Movie Review: The Day Of The Triffids (1962)

by Greg Goodsell

Directed by Steve Sekely

"And I got really hot, When I saw Jeanette Scott, Fight a triffid that spits poison and kills -- "

“Science-Fiction Double Feature” from “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”

Buy The Day of the Triffids on DVD

Angry asparagus plants with tentacles threaten mankind with abject boredom in The Day of the Triffids, an eloquent demonstration of all that is wrong with British science-fiction. It’s really too bad, as the previous alien-invasion film based on a John Wyndham novel, “The Midwich Cuckoos” was rendered unto film as the Village of the Damned (1980) and has since reached iconic status. That story, about cold-blooded tow-headed children born in an isolated English village ratcheted up the suspense with all manner of subtle underpinnings. Wyndham’s “The Day of the Triffids” is a run-of-the-mill walking killer plant movie, a stale relic of the Fifties adjusted to the widescreen color films of the Sixties.

The Bird with the Crystal Plumage (1970, Blu-ray)

I really think there can be good argument as to who is exactly the "father" of the giallo film. Mario Bava could conceivably claim that mantle just for the sheer fact he got there first with his classic thriller Blood and Black Lace. Blood and Black Lace (1964) is essentially where the giallo formula came into fruition: the black gloved killer, point-of-view angles for our psycho, beautiful woman and lots of sharp objects. Dario Argento made his directorial debut with the surprise hit, The Bird with the Crystal Plumage - came six-years after Bava captivated audiences across the world with "Lace". What did Argento do to separate himself from Bava? He made giallo successful internationally. Now, the UK based company Arrow Film and Video have decided to put out a special edition Blu-ray of The Bird with the Crystal Plumage. Yes, more Argento on Blu-ray.

Buy The Bird with the Crystal Plumage [Blu-ray]

The Violent Kind available now from Image Entertainment!

On May 10th, Image Entertainment unleashed The Violent Kind, a wild and unpredictable story that explores the dominion of evil on the highways. Directed by the Butcher Brothers (The Hamiltons) and a horror hit at this year’s Sundance Film Festival, The Violent Kind will be available on DVD for an SRP of $27.97 and on Blu-ray™ for an SRP of $29.97.

Buy The Violent Kind on Blu-ray or DVD

Movie Review: Alien 2 - On Earth (1980, Blu-ray)

Let’s get this right out of the way: Alien 2: On Earth has absolutely nothing to do with Alien. In the 1980s, the Italians were way ahead of their time in the rip-off category. I know that today places like the SyFy Channel will put out a Fred Olen Ray epic like Almighty Thor hot on the heels of the big budget Thor film. That is called a ‘mockbuster.’ You see, you cannot copyright a word, like Thor. The name for a Norse god was around for a long time before Stan Lee and Marvel Comics. The Italians had us Americans beat by thirty years. You see, the word alien has been around a long time… and Alien 2, if it has nothing to do or takes nothing trademarked from Alien, is perfectly legal. I mean, Alien 2 has NOTHING to do with the original. The ‘monster’ is different, the story (what there is of it) is different… everything. That includes: good direction, wonderful acting, brilliant camera work, genius screenplay and more. Alien 2: On Earth has none of these things. There is something that Alien 2 does have, though, that the Ridley Scott epic doesn’t. A little girl with the hairiest arms on the planet and thanks to Midnight Legacy’s Blu-ray release I think I’m the first person in the world to notice it.

Buy Alien 2: On Earth Blu-ray or DVD!

Interview: Ultimate Death Match Director Shawn Cain

1. What kind of childhood did Shawn Cain have?

Not the norm, I'm a twin; most people don't know that my sister's name is Candy. I see the world very different than most, When I was a kid the teachers thought I had a learning disability, because of my speech problem. When I was a child very I fell on a Q-tip and it popped my eardrum, so when I was learning how to speak the sound came in distorted cause me to repeat it wrongly. The teachers just shoved me into the special ed classes.

Find Shawn Cain on Amazon.com

I got to see children bully other children, and just how mean the normal children were. I went to many different schools growing up. I always had a little problem with bullies. I was an easy target, so one summer day I was over at my older sister's home and I went over to this school that was very close to her home. Started playing with these kids, they found out that I was in Special Ed. they made fun of me, one thing led to another, and all 12 of them beat me, kicked me, hit me with bats, and put me in the hospital. That was the best day of my life, since that day I have never been a victim. I have stood up for myself, and to those around me. I know whom I am, and what i stand for, and that gives me strength.

TV on DVD Review: Breaking Bad: The Complete First Season (2008)

You know, I'm pretty sure every guy has an outlaw fantasy. I know I do. Hell, I have several. I often wonder what it would be like to rob a bank, or pull off some great insane heist, Ocean's Eleven style. I've even wondered what kind of crazy life I'd have if I was a powerful drug lord. Knowing the consequences, I'd never get into a crazy situation like that. Let's face it. I'm pretty enough to get passed around a prison laundry room like a wet fifi, and I'm not big enough to effective fight off thirty guys with erections. That's enough to keep me from a life of crime. That's exactly why I'm thankful for Breaking Bad.

Buy Breaking Bad: The Complete First Season [Blu-ray] or DVD

Movie Review: Haunted Casino (2009)

I don’t know where you live, but I live in Arizona (for the next few days). In Arizona there are a ton of casinos. Some of these casinos are pretty small and a little creepy. These are the kinds of places where you can see eighty year old women smoking out of a tracheotomy, drunken slobs going broke on the penny slot machine and a buffet that makes public school lunches look like five star meals. If you have any of these little places around you it is an interesting, and depressing, cross section of humanity that owes it’s soul to the dark gods of chance. Charles Band’s Haunted Casino reminded me of these hole in the wall establishments… except it sucked a whole lot worse.

Buy Haunted Casino or Dead Man's Hand - Casino of the Damned, they're the same damn movie.

Movie Review: The Atomic Cafe (1982)

This film needs to be required viewing for every American. It’s that powerful and that persuasive and it is comprised solely from American nuclear propaganda films and news footage. It is a testament to how we, as Americans, will use whatever we can to win at all costs and, in the same token, how we as Americans will panic when we are faced with the consequences of using that power. The Atomic Café is a testament to how fear works on us: fear spread by our leaders, the media and our own ignorance… and how allaying that fear is as simple as forcing children to sing a song about ducks and covers. The Atomic Café is a uniquely American film that pulls no punches, but it doesn’t rely on a celebrity narrator, or reenactments. It doesn’t rely on half-baked theories or conspiracies. The Atomic Café is us, in our own words, stitched together so we can see the story, in total.

Buy The Atomic Cafe or watch the entire film below.

The Danish Zombie Film Opstandelsen Is Now Available From Another World Entertainment!

On May 10th AWE released the Danish zombie film Opstandelsen (tr: Resurrection) on DVD. Directed by aspiring film maker Casper Haugegaard, the film was made on a budget of 50.000 DKR (approx. US$10.000) and shot in and around Oestofte church and cemetery.

Angry Birds Now Available on Google Chrome and Angry Merch!

For you cheapo losers who still haven't gotten a smartphone, there is still hope. Yeah, yeah, don't tell me your contract isn't up, or you haven't gotten a chance to shop around. Android, iPhone, you've heard of it. either way, you can now play Angry Birds on your computer in HD.

All you need to do is download Google Chrome. If that's already your browser, head over to the app section and download the big Angry Birds app. If you've already played on your phone, it'll be fairly similar to what you're used to, except easier to beat with the smoother interface. Basically, your fat thumbs, ads and phone lag won't be a problem. There are also some Chrome specific levels, but you have to hit the logos on certain levels to unlock them. There is also a promise of more to come.

I'm also amazed at the amount of things available for purchase with the Birds attached. There are plush toys, t-shirts, key rings, pins and phone accessories. Click the links to find them on Amazon.com and enjoy!

Argento's The Bird With Crystal Plumage Coming to Blu-ray May 23rd from Arrow Video!

Starring: Tony Musante, Suzy Kendall, Enrico Maria Salerno
Directed by: Dario Argento
Rating: 15
Duration: 96 mins

Overview: A stunning portrait in psycho-terror!

Movie Review: El Topo (1970, Blu-ray)

When John Ford was working his way to be one of the quintessential western cinema auteurs with his classic efforts, My Darling Clementine, Fort Apache and Rio Grande, his very formula of the "western" became a blue print for other directors in Hollywood and abroad. Of course, we do have Sergio Leone (Fistful of Dollars) and Sam Peckinpah (Wild Bunch) who did their own thing with more authentic nastier takes on the old west. All three are no doubt legends and true fixtures in this wonderful genre but neither took the western to the surreal heights that Alejandro Jodorowsky did with El Topo. El Topo now sees a Blu-ray release from the folks at Anchor Bay following their fine Jodorowsky box set from a few years back.

Buy El Topo [Blu-ray]!

On the Set of Back Woods 2: Round 2

We wrap on the greatest sequel ever made. Dolniak as Moyers = retard. Luann makes lasers. Mangina passes the torch. Hayes and Elder regret everything.

Movie Review: Sexy Pirates (1998)

Joe D'Amato rarely loses with this viewer. Even with some of the more paltry offerings from the Italian genre hopper, I can find some silver lining. It could be a nice pair of boobs, Laura Gemser, the antics of Pedro The Horse, a gnarly cannibal eating a fetus - and depending on your taste, Mark Shannon's scrotum. Several years ago I discovered Joe thanks to the late-great writer, Chas. Balun. Balun wrote an excellent article in one of the earlier editions of Gorezone magazine that made me want to seek this director's films. First it was Anthropophagous, then Buio Omega (Buried Alive) and after that, I was in love. That brings me to Sexy Pirates (aka I Predatori delle Antille), directed under one of his several pseudonyms, David Hills. The title sounds perfect and the cover One 7 Movies uses is even more inviting. Could this be a lost D’ Amato classic or will it break this swashbuckling reviewer?