Movie Review: Climb It, Tarzan! (2011, Independent Entertainment)

Directed by Jared Masters
Starring Jennicka Andersson, Jamie Devitt and Zrinka Dozic
Run Time: 75 minutes
Unrated

The time is the sixties, its the dawn of the sexploitation era and aspiring model Ginger (Jamie Devitt) learns the only available photo assignments are for naughty men’s magazines, and that she must risk eviction or succumb to the sadistic perversions of dominating lesbian photographer Paula (Jennicka Andersson). As naive Ginger discovers first-hand that there is no chance of becoming a wholesome pin-up queen, her secretive sister Janet (Jessica Hichborn) takes a job as a go-go dancer, baring her flesh by night and living out of a Venice Beach sailboat by night.

Billed as a tribute to sexploitation cinema, Climb It, Tarzan! consists of an all-female cast of over fifty young budding starlets, most of which are more then willing to “drop the top” for the camera of the creepy but hot Scandinavian photographer Paula. In all honesty this movie started out quite nicely, with a nude photo-shoot followed by the hapless model getting chloroformed and molested by the photographer. Five minutes in I’m thinking to myself, “Gentlemen, we have a winner!” Unfortunately it was all pretty much a free-fall into the lamest, most yawn-inducing recesses of bad-cinema imaginable from that point forward.

Movie Review: Grindhouse Hotties - Rene Bond Sleazy Triple Feature

The folks at After Hours Cinema have churned out some quality smut over the past few years with numerous vintage XXX film collections catering to 70's sleaze lovers. Naturally, they feature some some the porn greats from yesteryear. Rene Bond is the focus on After Hours' Grindhouse Hotties: Rene Bond Sleazy 70s Triple Feature. This fellatio-heavy fuck film trio consists of three films, Sounds of Sex, City Woman and Show'N Tell.

Buy Sleazy 70s Triple Feature on DVD

Movie Review: Butterflies (1974)

by Greg Goodsell

Directed By Joe Sarno

Denise (Marie Forsa) is tired of her farm girl life in rural Germany and pines for the bright lights, big city. Climbing aboard her country-hick boyfriend (American porn star Eric Edwards) one last time, she packs a tube of lipstick in an exceedingly tiny suitcase and thumbs a ride to Munich. Meeting a pig-face lingerie salesman along the way, Denise hooks up with suave and de-boner nightclub owner Frank (porno icon Harry Reems – in his hottest role). Whisking her away to his penthouse apartment in Munich, Denise is wined, dined and sixty-nined under the proviso that she is aware that she is only one of a countless string of women who is lining up for Frank's precious bodily fluids. Reems fornicates with several women in many intense scenes, until Denise gets sick and tired of his fuckin' shit, hits the road and presumably thumbs a ride back to the farm.

Movie Review: Zombie Babies (2012)

I think I've found a film that would go beautifully as a double-bill with Ryan Nicholson's Hanger. This little bad boy’s called Zombie Babies. Abortion/ comedy epics are really at a minimum for the sickos that dig them so what a pleasant surprise to see Eamon Hardiman's highly offensive and surprisingly occasionally funny flick about aborted babies who come back to life to kill and feast on a group of dopes at an abortion clinic / hotel/casino. Yes, that's the plot. Ohh... the shit we get here for review... wow!

Movie Review: Come and Get Me (2012, Bloody Earth Films)

Directed by Chris Sun
Starring Christian Radford, Shaun Trainer and Alexis Fernandez
Run Time: 90 minutes
Rated: Unrated

Four female friends take a trip to the city for a girls-night-out and after drinking more then their share of shots and lacking a ride home, one of them decides to go through her phone looking for someone to give them a ride. She comes across the number of a boy she used to make fun of when they were in school together and puts up a front, pretending to like him in order to get what she wants. Unfortunately for her though, this young man is now the youngest member of a three man serial-killer team which takes delight in abducting, torturing and killing women who rebuff their sexual advances. Once they hook up for their ride it isn't long before one of the intoxicated girls starts mouthing off and that's when things go south for the quartet of snooty bitches. Deep in the Australian hinterlands and miles from help, the girls must fight for their lives in a night that will be filled with death and terror.

Movie Review: Grindhouse Collection: Sex Before Marriage Double Feature (1969,1970)

Whenever a new collection from After Hours Cinema's "Grindhouse Collection" series comes out, more often than not vintage XXX fans get a treasure trove of ultra-sleazy goodness. With some of the biggest stars and directors of the 70's spotlighting many of the releases (John Holmes, Rene Bond, Tina Russell, Carter Stevens) so you're almost certain to find at least something to entertain. The recent release of the Sex Before Marriage double feature has none of those stars but it is appropriately filthy when it's not dull.

Sex Before Marriage opens this double-bill of early XXX smut in grand fashion with a lamb-chop sideburn wearing bachelor partaking in pre-nuptial fornication with his fiancée. One woman ain’t enough for this dude so after he finishes on her belly he goes on the hunt for some cooch not attached to his wife. In between and during the sex scenes we see is wife in front of a church waving a bouquet of flowers and looking frustrated because he hasn’t shown up to the wedding that was actually that day. This one’s watchable for some of the camp value surrounding the pre-wedding shenanigans, but I have to warn, the sex scenes are generally pretty painful.

Movie Review: Babysitter Massacre (2013, Alternative Cinema)

...having engaged and embraced the 'slasher' horror sub-genre at a relatively young age...remembering a time when just about every weekend, during the early-to-mid '80's, there were new, blood-drenched offerings in this sub-genre...this ardent viewer can't help but appreciate the recent wave of horror cinema, which pays a lovingly devoted homage to that bygone era. The best of the lot, not only borrowing straight from the prerequisite 'rulebook', associated with the genre...the masked killer, who's identity is suggested and hinted at, in the course of the film, given a plethora of distracting 'red herrings', but an identity not revealed, until the last...beautiful, buxomous and scantly-clad (...if that) young women, who are dimly aware of 'what happened before', but remain bravely naive and unaware enough, to haplessly provide themselves as helpless 'slasher' fodder for the killer...the one 'surviving' gal at the end...innocent, virtuous, and yet less naive...a fighter, clothed in something next to nothing, and reduced panic-stricken flight...the false scare jolts, followed by a moment of relaxing 'whew', before the real scare jolts kick in...and of course, a generous balance of lingering nudity, and righteous arterial spray...and more boobies...and more blood...and more boob...well, you get the point...but also affords the viewer a measurable caveat of...something not necessarily original, but at least an element...a twist on the genre, unique and individual enough, to make the film it's own creature. Does our newest offering, "Babysitter Massacre", have all that...and a ham sandwich?? Let's find out, shall we??...

Movie Review: New York Grindhouse Superstars: Kathy's Graduation, School Of Sexual Arts and Tycoon's Daughter

Review by Alain Andbasquet

Situation: You, being the classic adult film lover, are knocking back a couple of 40's with one of your friends and start telling them about all the great films from that era of outlaw cinema. They? Are still way skeptical, with visions of hairy nutsacks, horny pizza boys and bad acting in their heads. Okay, fine. You're obviously going to need some evidence of a more physical kind (not that kind of physical, perv) to prove them wrong. After all, there are two kinds of adult films. The ones that can function as both a movie and an adult film and then straight up sleaze, in all of its sweaty and awkward dangling glory. After Hours Cinema DVD release, “New York Grindhouse Superstars” is completely and a 100% in the latter category. Even better for you smuthounds, it's a triple bill, all helmed by one of the most notable directors of that era, Shaun Costello.

Buy New York Grindhouse Superstars on DVD

Movie Review: Grindhouse Collection: John Holmes Biggest & Best

The legendary supercock is back! In yet another collection from After Hours Cinema, John Curtis Holmes is featured in his early years probing just about anything he can get his massive appendage in. This time around you get to see four films - Strangers When We Mate, Bed Companions, My Tongue is Quick and Johnny's Sex Stories all from the After Hours Films archives.

In Strangers When We Mate, a group of seven total strangers meet up in some mansion in what looks to be California. A doctor therapist type (who looks like Gabe Kaplan from Welcome Back Kotter fame) encourages the seven horny folks to engage in both one-on-one. Holmes plays a cowboy with an accent thicker than his celebrated wang. The narration by the "doctor" is pretty funny on this one as are the performances, making Strangers When We Mate one of the better films on the set.

Sarno's Inga Collection Seduces Its Way to DVD in a Special Collectors Set!

Joseph Sarno’s Acclaimed Masterpiece of Erotic Cinema is Back in

THE INGA COLLECTION

Retro Seduction Cinema’s Deluxe 3-Film, 3-Disc Collection

Available August 14, 2012

New York, NY June 4, 20120 – The newest entry in Retro Seduction Cinema’s critically acclaimed line of classic sexploitation cinema, the INGA COLLECTION, reintroduces three iconic films by NYC auteur Joseph Sarno, previously available as distinct, limited-edition numbered DVDs: INGA, SEDUCTION OF INGA and THE INDELICATE BALANCE.

Shot entirely in Sweden, INGA and SEDUCTION OF INGA swept U.S. box offices and catapulted young Swedish starlet Marie Liljedahl to international fame while securing director Joseph Sarno’s reputation as the “Ingmar Bergman of Erotic Cinema”. Also included is the lesser-known, but equally compelling Swedish production, THE INDELICATE BALANCE.

Synopsis:

Three acclaimed tales of sexual awakening and forbidden passion by sexploitation auteur Joseph Sarno, now available in a new collector’s edition release from Retro Seduction Cinema:

Inga – Marie Liljedahl is Inga, a beautiful and naïve young woman who becomes a pawn in a game of sexual manipulation and deceit after her move into her aunt’s home. To escape, she must choose between the arms of a sophisticated much-older man and those of her aunt’s younger lover.

Seduction of Inga - Alone and penniless, Inga (Marie Liljedahl) becomes the personal secretary and lover of a dashing older man. But when business takes him away, temptation proves too difficult to resist, and soon Inga must choose between her lover, his mistress and a handsome young musician.

The Indelicate Balance – A prolonged stay at his attractive and overbearing mother’s home prompts Harald and his wife Karin to question their relationship, ultimately driving Karin into the arms of another woman.

Movie Review: New York Grindhouse Avon 7 Triple Feature: Slave Of Pleasure/ My Mistress Elektra/ Prisoner Of Pleasure

To me, it really comes as no surprise when watching vintage porn, New York's Time Square was undoubtedly the Mecca of smut during the 80's. The filth historians at After Hours Cinema have been taking full advantage of the Big Apple's sleaze havens by releasing numerous film compilations highlighting 42nd Street's best. Here the famous (and infamous) Avon 7 Theater is given center stage along with porn pioneer Shaun Costello (Forced Entry, More Than Sisters, Pandora's Mirror). This particular smut palace was widely known for showing some of the nastier, cheaper, S&M themed adult cinema on the Deuce. The Avon Theater managed to become popular among many perverts - even for showing this niche brand of BDSM porn . Three films are featured here, all directed by Shaun Costello : Slave of Pleasure, My Mistress Electra and Prisoner of Pleasure.

Movie Review: Grindhouse Collection - Sex Mad Family

After Hours Cinema has done an admirable job for us perverts by continuing to dig deep into their massive vault of vintage hardcore porn with their various themed "Grindhouse Collections". The theme in the trio of titles on their Grindhouse Triple Feature: Sex Mad Family is aimed at only the true pervert - the kind that doesn't mind seeing family members do some screwin'. Cousin Pauline, Curious Women and Sex Mad Family are the three films included, and folks they're some crazy, cheap pre-Taboo filthiness.

The very first dose of dangling dicks and sloppy seventy’s tits is the delightful, Sex Mad Family. Here we have a father resembling Art Garfunkel, with a penchant for S&M and slightly uncomfortable discussions with his daughter. He can’t seem to get any lovin' from his wife so it’s off to his mistress for some slap ‘n’ tickle and good old fashioned fucking. Meanwhile, his very curious but dumb as a rock daughter stays at home with her cousin exploring their bodies. Sex Mad, they are, but attractive they ain’t. A lot of funny lines are thrown around in this flick, even though there really isn’t much to look at on the screen.

Zombie Gore-fest "Ground Zero" Arrives On DVD August 14th!

“BLOOD SPLATTERED AND CREEPY”*

IN THE BODY CLEANING BUSINESS, NO JOB IS THIS EASY…

GROUND ZERO

AVAILABLE 08/14/2012 TO DVD AND DIGITAL MARKETS

FROM SHOCK-O-RAMA CINEMA

New York, NY – A bio-engineering company, a desperate political activist and two all-too-human cleaners set the scene for this spooky, smart and suspenseful film about a deadly virus with the potential to end humankind…by bringing them back from the dead.

Eschewing the ‘hordes of the living dead vs. a handful of survivors’ approach to the zombie genre, GROUND ZERO builds tension to alarming effect by pitting its relatable characters and unusual but believable challenges in the here and now.

Synopsis:

Two professional ‘cleaners’ are hired to collect a frozen corpse located high in the mountains and dispose of it in an old warehouse, unaware the body belongs to political activist Darius, brutally assassinated by Nat-Tech Corp. after injecting himself with a deadly virus.

A swiftly-defrosting infected corpse in tow, they arrive at the warehouse to discover a group of amateur cleaners, a rising body count…and a rising corpse. Can our cleaners avert a global biological meltdown, or will Darius’ grave become Ground Zero?

Directed by Channing Lowe, Ground Zero is a visceral new take on the zombie origin genre that will have you on the edge of your seat!

*EzineArticles.com

Watch the GROUND ZERO Trailer Here

http://youtu.be/-Bd2BxUqhOc

GROUND ZERO DVDand Technical Specs

Title: GROUND ZERO

Director: Channing Lowe

Stars: Mike Langer, Sahna Foley, D. L. Walker

SRP: $19.98

UPC: 612385008894

Aspect Ratio Feature Film: 16x9

Number of discs: 1

DVD Format: 5

Rating: Not Rated

Audio: 2.0 Stereo

Total Run Time: 122 min.

Disc Breakdown

Feature Film GROUND ZERO 87 min.

GROUND ZERO Outtakes 10 min.

Making of GROUND ZERO 19 min. 24 sec.

Trailer Vault 6 min 36 sec.

Camp Motion Pictures Looks to Make Your Skin Crawl with "Documenting The Grey Man"

Not All Legends Are Ghost Stories

DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN

Own the Hair-Raising and Unrated Found-Footage DVD

Or Digital Copy July 17, 2012

January 6, 2012 New York, NY – An historical 10,000 square foot plantation house in the rural back woods of South Carolina is the setting for this spine-tingling new entry in the paranormal found-footage genre, DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN. 

Directed by Wayne Capps and produced by Matt Slechter, DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN tells the tale of a group of actors intent on faking a ghost hunting expedition about the famous Grey Man of Pawley’s Island, South Carolina.  Their plan would be to show how the hysteria surrounding ghost stories could be exploited.  What they encountered is the stuff legends are made of.  Called a “can’t miss for fans of GHOST HUNTERS and other ghost investigator series” by ain’t it cool news, DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN is a suspenseful and intelligent examination of ghost and possession phenomenon that might just scare the pants off you!

Synopsis:

“Extremely effective” with moments of “sheer horror”(ain’t it cool news), Documenting the Grey Man is a hair-raising paranormal found-footage investigation by a group of avaricious actors determined to exploit a family claiming to be haunted by a ghost. 

What they encounter will terrify you. 

DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN comes to DVD and Digital Markets July 17, 2012 by Camp Motion Pictures.  Watch the trailer here ­­­–

http://youtu.be/4_0C9h6eIyU

DVD Specs and Technical Information

Title: DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN

Street Date: July 17, 2012

SRP: $19.98

Number of Discs: 1

Region: 0

UPC: 612385008795

Stereo: 2.0

Aspect Ratio: 16x9

Run Time Feature: 65 mins

Total Run Time: 80 mins 48 secs

Disc Breakdown

DOCUMENTING THE GREY MAN FEATURE

TRAILER VAULT

Movie Review: Trippin' (2010)

Occasionally when I have that rare chance to get out I love to hit local film festivals. The only problem is, is that they rarely come to Phoenix. Horror film festivals even more so are few and far between. A couple years back we had a genre festival in which I went to a showing of Devi Snively's Trippin'.  I unfortunately only got a chance to see about 20 minutes of it. What I saw was fun, so it was very cool to see that Alternative Cinema had picked it up for distribution. Was it good beyond the 20 minutes? Let's see.

A group of young campers set out to enjoy some sex, drugs and well...more drugs. The kids seem to be purposely cliché: virginal girl, slut and of course a stoner named Zed (Zed Wilson). Everything seems to be going fine until the group crosses paths with a creepy fellow lugging around a rolled carpet with some red substance dripping from it. Could it be a body? Well, a couple of the kids think so.

Movie Review: Porkchop (2011)

Over the years the "Backwoods" horror subgenre have brought many a cult film fan some fine entertainment without having to pack up any camping gear or eat dogs and beans off a fire. Rituals and Just Before Dawn come to mind as being top-notch representations; we've also had no-budget SOV schlock like  Back Woods and Cannibal Campout that aren't quite the most polished but bring out their own unique charm. Eamon Hardiman's Porkchop is much like the latter.

Buy Porkchop on DVD

Movie Review:The Basement: Retro 80s Horror Collection

I try pretty hard to not throw the "nostalgia" word around too much, occasionally though there is a special title that comes through our grubby hands here at the Cinema Head Cheese offices that warrants it. Alternative Cinema has put together a box set that has unleashed a nostalgic joy rarely experienced with their recent release of The Basement: Retro 80s Horror Collection. This mammoth box of schlock consists of five movies: Cannibal Campout, Video Violence I and II and the unreleased features Captives and of course the film that the set is titled after, Tim O' Rawe's 8mm horror anthology, The Basement.

Buy The Basement: Retro 80s Horror Collection on DVD

Movie Review: Carter Stevens "Teenage Twins" Collection (1976-1977)

After Hours Cinema is back with yet another dose of their “Grindhouse Directors Series”. This time around smut film pioneer Carter Stevens has three of his finest films in a handy dandy collection with the Carter Stevens Teenage Twins Collection – Teenage Twins, Punk Rock and Rollerbabies.

Buy The Teenage Twins Collection on DVD

Teenage Twins is an interesting animal. It’s pretty much a one location sex film produced on a super low-budget. The budget and simple set doesn’t matter here because like other Carter Stevens films - it has a gimmick. This device may not sit well with some folks but it involves the two stars of the film who are identical twin sisters, Brooke and Taylor Young. There really isn’t much of a plot here but it does showcase these very “loving” sisters partaking in a sixty-nine position and one even masturbates with a Bible. Adult film legend, Eric Edwards (a frequent performer in Stevens’ films) is on hand for some of the fun.

Movie Review: Uncle Farts' '70s Grindhouse Sleazefest (2011)

Two things that I enjoy most in my vast entertainment tastes are bouncing breasts and fart humor. When I saw that the folks at Alternative Cinema were producing yet another sleazy movie set similar to the very generous After Hours Films line called Uncle Farts' '70s Grindhouse Sleazefest, this filth enthusiast got quite eager to check out a new collection of vintage smut. The films compiled on the set include: Sex Odyssey, Dionysius, Honky Tonk Nights and Satan's Daughter. The atrociously animated Uncle Farts is your humble host for all four outings.

Buy Uncle Farts' '70s Grindhouse Sleazefest on DVD