Cinema Head Cheese - Movie Reviews, News, a Podcast and more!: indie horror

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December 19, 2025

Camp Blood Christmas - Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

So, when I heard there was a movie that brought David C. Hayes out of (acting) retirement, you bet your SWEET ASS that I was going to see it no matter the cost. Luckily for me, David is my friend, and he obviously considers me the same because he brought me a copy of it, Blu Ray no less, when it became available.

And just in time for Christmas, here is my review of the 2025 film, Camp Blood Christmas.

NOTE: I won’t be spoiling any plot points as this film LITERALLY just came out. People need to experience this film on their own terms.

The basic idea is this: a group of misfits answers a job ad for a new Santa Snow Camp, a winter excursion place for kids to enjoy winter and Santa Clause and all that crap. Aside from the delay of the food and supplies guy, Carl, everything seems to be going swimmingly. But then, Gary, the hired Santa Clause, shares the bloody massacre-prone history of the location of the new camp.

Turns out it was a regular camp at one time until there were a bunch murders committed by the Clown Killer.

Fun fact: the opening credits consist of snippets from many of the previous fourteen Camp Blood movies.

You heard me. FOUR-FUCKING-TEEN. (Depending on who you talk to, it could only be fourteen total films which means snippets from THIR-FUCKING-TEEN films fill the opening credits.)

Anyway, as you might imagine, the reason Carl never showed? Seems the Clown Killer has returned. But what you might not have imagined, is the reason WHY. Whoa, PLOT TWIST! But then you probably didn’t image ANOTHER twist on top of that. It’s like the villain neck-cracking the hero right before he can save the day!

Will anyone survive this rampage? Maybe.

Will this family camp every get off the ground? Probably not.

Will we care?

Now, we all know how indie horror films usually go, don’t we? Low budget, lackluster acting, minimal continuity, terrible editing, bad sound, ridiculous plots and their giant holes, and so on and so forth. And, generally speaking, this is consistent with those issues – except sound. This is probably the first indie film I’ve watched where I didn’t need to keep adjusting the volume throughout the whole fucking thing because the dialogue was too quiet and the effects were too loud.

Good job, guys!

But yet, other than the great sound, this films lacks a lot. Character development is minimal because honestly, I really only cared about the hitch hiking, bearded, gummy dosing happy dude, Eddie (I think that’s him). Everyone else? Eh. A lot of the jokes fell flat; the dialogue felt stilted and unnatural; and way too much time was spent filming David’s butt crack.

HOWEVER…

Quite a few of the jokes landed perfectly. I personally loved the ditzy bombshell taking nudes of “down there” with her landline phone to send to her boyfriend. The story itself is pretty fun. While I will say some of the dialogue actually tells us what’s coming, the reveals and twists felt totally unexpected. The practical effects looked good (way to go, Emily Sammons, for the design on the severed penis). And it was easy to tell everyone who worked on the movie had good chemistry. They put in a lot of effort and while not perfect, it really shows their dedication.

Matt Dilts-Williams did a great job at writing a fun and entertaining story, as well as directing the cast and crew.

So if you’re interested in seeing what’s happening in the indie scene, and wouldn’t mind taking a chance on a humorous holiday horror – and David’s butt crack – get yourself a copy of Camp Blood Christmas. Don’t forget to hang around through the ending credits. That final song is pretty dang catchy.

And have a hell of a happy holiday season!

3 hatchets (out of 5)

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June 29, 2025

Let Us In (2022) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

In October 2024, I believe I met the writer/director of an indie horror flick that was filmed right here in Michigan. I said I’d be happy to review it for CHC and now, nearly nine months later, I’m finally getting around to it.

I am so sorry I’m a lazy asshole, Anthony!

Anyway, let’s get to it! I’ll try not to spoil anything as it’s a relatively new film and someone out there might not have had the chance to see it yet.

Personally, that might be for the best…

Let Us In is basically some kind of zombie film that takes place in the middle of petty squabbles between rival motorcycle gangs. The film jumps around a lot between the gang members, some guy hiding out in NOT his house with a sick wife, a random dude whose car breaks down, and some chick who…I don’t even know her fucking issue.

Their storylines eventually cross, leaving a lot of blood and violence on the front lawn for the hazmat team to clean up.

That’s about it. There’s not a lot of depth going on in this movie. I admit Anthony tried to make a more interesting flick than just your standard zombie trope-filled celluloid. It could have worked if the sound was even, or if the acting was better, or the special effects looked more convincing, or it made any sense at all.

The story arc jumping was too much. Each character group/story had about two minutes of screen time – if we were lucky – before switching to another. It’s mostly difficult to keep track of the story because the audio is absolute GARBAGE. Maybe that’s why the opening title screen says, “This film should be played LOUD!”

Fuck my life…

The “special f/x” are pretty bad, which is not uncommon for indie horror. But when the neck flap of the mask is clearly visible on the zombie, and there aren’t more guts on a victim after a chainsaw attack, it makes it a little difficult to become immersed in the action.

But I have to say the most implausible scene that really pissed me off was a character with a SHOTGUN acquiesced to a character with a CHAINSAW who threatened to saw off their hands if they didn’t put the gun down. I mean, what the actual fuck? He’s standing two feet away from you. Blow that fucking asshole’s head off and move on.

*ahem*

Anyway…

It’s not a total loss here. The film is only 57 minutes, which helps a great deal, even if some of it feels like filler to pad the run time. And while character development was obviously not a priority here (the biker chick, Meg, was introduced via her bare tits and I don’t think she had any dialogue at all) the character of Chris is actually kinda fun. He’s got a fight scene with a zombie that pretty fucking cool. I’m not sure if he’s supposed to be some kind of bad ass or former Green Beret but I’d believe it if that was the explanation for his bad-assery.

Also some of the cinematography is great. Many of the shots needed to convey that sense of emptiness that comes with a global infectious event and this flick delivered where needed.

They did put out a goofy gimmick with the movie, a la William Castle. Barf bags were included inside the DVD case. I wouldn’t say this movie had that much gore in it but I get the idea behind it. Nice little throwback to the tamer days of horror presentation.

Adorbs

While I wouldn’t recommend this film at all, I won’t judge anyone who’d like to support Anthony and any of his future projects. I think there’s a lot of potential there. Maybe not the next Tarantino or Roth, but it might be fun to see where he goes from here.

1 hatchet (out of 5)

I have no links or site where you can get this flick so if you're really interested, maybe email or call Anthony!

January 22, 2025

PSYCHO APE MOVIE REVIEW

Posted by PeggyC

Despite the vitriol I spew in many of my reviews here at CHC, I do actually enjoy watching indie horror films. Sure, there are a lot of shit piles to dig through to find that one perfect undigested kernel of corn. And though that can be exhausting, it makes it worthwhile if I can find a film that’s entertaining and done well, despite budgetary and talent pool limitations.

This is not one of those films.

Psycho Ape is a ridiculous story about an ape wearing tennis shoes that, 25 years ago, escaped from the Detroit Zoo and went on a murderous rampage. For some reason, he homes in on a slumber party of a half a dozen young women and he kills all of them except for Nancy, the ape enthusiast, who faints with delight at the sight of the beast.

The zookeeper/animal psychologist, Dr. Zoomis, who is trying to track down the ape, loses its trail, thus beginning his decades-long obsession with the animal.

25 years later, the ape has been continuing its murderous ways. Even though it has a house and built a good life for itself, it just keeps killing. Eventually, the ape finds the long-disappeared Nancy, and they get along great. In fact, she even encourages the brutal beast to slay people who annoy her.

But don’t worry. Dr. Zoomis catches up to them and captures the ape. After ANOTHER 25 years, the creature escapes AGAIN, hooks up with Nancy, and a final fight up the Empire State Building (a la King Kong) ensues. Dr. Zoomis is thrown off; the ape is thrown off. Nancy survives only to be joined by a somehow no longer dead Dr. Zoomis, and they walk off into the sunset, holding hands.

WHAT.

THE.

FUCK.

FOR.

REAL.

Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.

Now, to clarify, this is a comedy/horror. It is meant to be farce, silly, ridiculous, over the top, absurd. I know that because the inconsistencies in story and editing and sound and continuity and quality cannot convince me otherwise. Even one of the beginning title cards says this movie is, “the dumbest, cheapest one of them all.”

And I can appreciate that honesty.

I have to admit that I really did enjoy the kills. Death by banana was a fun gag, though not the only way the psycho ape killed people. The f/x was a mix of absolute shite CGI and practical stuff. They were…meh.

I did chuckle a couple of times but most of the humor was a big miss. Nearly every scene had elements or was in its entirety some kind of parody of a larger, more well-known franchise. After a while, that loses its impact and becomes quite tiresome. And don’t get me started on the ten-minute filler scene of two trick-or-treaters arguing about what the best animated film is, or whatever the FUCK they were talking about, while the crew decides to stop filming and join the conversation.

Like, what the hell was that? I actually tuned out and stopped watching the movie until the scene changed and someone either died or started yelling. I honestly don’t remember.

Open wide for my beautiful banana...

And perhaps the explanation of what characters were doing after the events of the film was meant to be funny, considering most of them died at some point. But it honestly just felt like a cheap cop-out and lazy writing. Though it did open it up for Psycho Ape 2.

WHYYYYY though? Who asked for that??

Anyway, though there was obviously passion and fun built into this movie, I cannot recommend it for any sane person to watch. Even someone like me, who is secretly a twelve-year old boy, can only tolerate so much in one sitting.

.5 hatchet out of 5

December 21, 2024

Christmas Capsule Reviews 2024 - Part III

Posted by PeggyC

Well, hot damn, I did it. I set out to write up three lists of capsule reviews of the Christmas horror flicks streaming on the services I can access and here we are on list 3. Now, I didn’t watch EVERY available flick on each platform because, let’s be honest. I don’t have the patience for that shit. Plus I’ve already seen a bunch and didn’t want to revisit them here.

This list includes the movies you can watch on SHUDDER.

Carnage for Christmas 2024 (A transgender holiday film - that was specifically noted on the opening title card so I figured I’d mention it)
A true crime podcaster returns home for Christmas and gets wrapped up in the tale of a historic murderer who may have returned.

Kind of a standard trope of a story line. Nothing innovative. The acting is less than stellar except for the actress playing the podcaster, Lola. A lot of the murders and some flashback scenes are edited with artsy lighting and flashing/color changing lights. Which just infuriates me to no end (if you’re not new here, you should not be surprised but this.) And while the practical blood/gore effects are appreciated, they are terribly cheap and cheesy looking. You’re not missing much if you skip this one.

Christmas Bloody Christmas 2022
A local toy store’s robotic Santa goes haywire and starts killing everyone.

So apparently these Mall Santas are being replaced with robots built with military grade technology. But…why though? That makes no sense. The acting is better than most indie films for sure. And the kills are pretty freaking epic, practical effects and everything. But it does take a while to get there. About 30 minutes before the first kill. Some of the banter between the two main characters drags on too long and then the final boss fight is basically a rip off of The Terminator. This really could have been better as a short film.

It’s a Wonderful Knife 2023
After saving her town from a psycho killer a year earlier, Winnie finds herself in a parallel universe where, without her, things are much worse.

Kind of interesting spin on “It’s a Wonderful Life” story but much darker. High production and better acting in this. A few more recognizable name actors in this, too. I didn’t realize that going in. Justin Long was excellent! Not sure they fully explained how this alternate reality was possible because the whole implied control or something but whatevs, I guess. Or how a character from the alternate reality could remember the alternate reality once back in the regular timeline…again, whatevs. Still pretty enjoyable.

The Christmas Spirit 2023
A man has a the Spirit of Christmas trapped in his head ever since his sister’s death 20 years prior. He must kidnap a teen girl and sacrifice her in order to save Christmas.

I liked the idea of the story even though the execution kinda missed the mark. I fast-forwarded through a lot of this to just get it moving. And the climax was taking WAY to long (amirite, ladies?) But the acting is decent, the practical effects are fun, and it did get me crying at one point. So it must have plucked at least one good heart string.

The other flicks available on Shudder are:

A Creature was Stirring
Rare Exports
“A Ghost Story for Christmas”Looks like a series but not sure if they’re all Christmas related or not
Body
Day of the Beast
The Gingerdead Man
I Trapped the Devil
The Sacrifice Game
Black Christmas (OG)
SNDN 2
Holidays
Apology
A Christmas Horror Story
The Advent Calendar
All The Creatures Were Stirring
Creepshow Holiday Special
Bunch of JoeBob stuff
Deadly Games
Christmas Presence

So there you have it. 2024’s Christmas Horror offerings (on just a few of the streaming services available.) Maybe next year I’ll just pick one service and watch everything there, or just keep doing reviews this way. I guess we’ll find out in 2025.

Hope everyone has a wonderful holiday and happy new year!

June 7, 2024

Bathtub Shark Attack (2023) Movie Review

Posted by PeggyC

If anyone remembers, about a year ago I reviewed an indie horror movie called Spirit Animal. Brought to us by Nekroshark Films, writer/director Madeline Deering has done it again with today’s review offering, Bathtub Shark Attack.

Yes, you read that correctly.

By the time I get to the end of the review, I’m sure I’ll have figured out exactly how I feel about this flick. But for now, let’s get into some details.

The basic premise of this one is about a down-on-their-luck couple who moves into a really cheap apartment, something that seems to good to be true. And you’d be right. Because the caveat here is a creature lurking in the pipes that demands flesh and blood!

Pretty straight forward, right? I don’t want to spoil too much of the plot since it just came out last year. And since it’s an indie film, it might take a little longer to get distributed beyond its native Pennsylvania and Ohio where I was able to get a copy (thanks for grabbing one, Jeff, while I worked the table with David at Cinema Wasteland.)

If I remember correctly, Spirit Animal opened with the rando bartender breaking the fourth wall to tell us about the movie. Guess what? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it because he’s back. He explains the tape; he explains the premise; and, again, he tells us about the game you have to play when watching with friends. Since the movie was shot in “Splash-o-Vision” every time a shark picture pops up on screen, shoot your fellow movie watchers with the squirt gun you got with the movie.

I watched a bit of the Indie-Go-Go promo in the Special Features section of the DVD and Madeline explains that they wanted to make the GORIEST shark film ever. I wasn’t so sure about that until we get to the final scene. But I’m not about to relive that moment so you’ll have to get the DVD and witness it yourself.

Lush just released their new Halloween bath bomb!

I have to say, there are GALLONS of blood sloshing around in this movie. There are probably a minimum of a dozen kills that involve some body part being bitten off, crushed in (with a toilet plunger no less), run through either by glass shards or projectiles. This doesn’t count the half a dozen characters who were electrocuted! And while, perhaps, the f/x weren’t super polished, I always appreciate practical rubber and corn syrup over trash CGI any day.

And Madeline certainly delivered! The blood, not the shit CGI.

The story itself is pretty standard as far as horror tropes go. Evil cult, immortal monster, virgin sacrifice, etc. And I appreciate that Madeline knows how to build a story, piece by piece, so we’re guessing what’s going to happen next (or trying to puzzle it out along the way). I’m not saying there weren’t parts I’d figured out right off the bat, but despite some general lagging in the middle, I liked the set-up, development, and climax of the story.

The one problem I had was trying to figure out when this movie is supposed to be taking place. There were a lot of nineties references (Melrose Place, the Nintendo gaming system the stoners used) but Chad references his record store job and how everyone wants cassettes now, not vinyl. Which would be the eighties. Also the woman in the beginning had a rotary phone which basically went out of fashion in the seventies and eighties…

SEE, THESE KIND OF INCONSISTENCIES DERAIL MY ENJOYMENT!

Anyway…

The character development felt a little lax but if they wanted to make this the goriest shark film ever, you’re gonna need a lot of cannon fodder and the audience can’t care about cannon fodder, amirite? While the acting was not good, I did find myself rooting for Chad and Bill the Plumber. In fact, there’s a scene between them where, after the power goes out in the building, Bill is dumbfounded by the fuse box and when Chad unintentionally sneaks up on him, they both do this pretend kung-fu dance that actually made me pause the DVD because I was laughing pretty hard.

How many times do I have to tell you NO GARLIC before lovey dovey time?

In fact, I think I did all my laughing at the scenes with Chad and Bill – not always together, though. Each character had his amusing moments. Probably the best with Bill was the epic fight scene with the cult near the end, and Chad jerking off with his right hand while he worked a Shake Weight in his left.

I do have to mention, though, for an indie horror, there was a particular LACK of titty shots. And I’m not complaining! It’s a rather tired trope so to only have a couple was rather refreshing. Hey, I get why they’re popular and why people demand them. But it was nice to see a writer/director do things a little differently for a change.

But if you want gratuitous nudity, there is an extreme close up of some lady bits at the end (again, I’m not going to describe it any more than that for reasons that will become clear if you watch the movie) and some shark dick. So…

I will spoil one thing for you. The number of times you’re supposed to squirt your friends with a water pistol (that I caught anyway): seventeen. I say turn that into a different party game and make it like going to a Japanese hibachi grill. Fill those guns with sake and the person you aim at has to drink!

So while this is not one of the better indie films I’ve seen, I have to say Madeline stepped up her game and delivered a solid horror comedy. Maybe not worth multiple watches but I’m not mad at the time I spent watching it.

3 hatchets (out of 5)

February 19, 2024

Atomic Swan Films - A Review of Various Shorts PART 2

Posted by PeggyC

All righty. Let's continue our journey down Atomic Swan Films lane, shall we? Here we go with Part 2.

PEDIE THE CLOWN COLLECTION

I reviewed the Vampire Hunter one from 2019 and you can read that HERE. This short is called:

Pedie the Clown Sex Educator (2022)

(I’m already dying)

Again we have an instructional video from Pedie the Clown only this time, instead of prepping us for vampire hunting, he is teaching children about the female reproductive system. It’s a little like Pee Wee’s Playhouse but instead of talking furniture and childlike wonder, we get an oversexed pedo with a medical illustration poster.

The kids learn all about the clitoris, the honey hole, eating babies, bush, crabs, the word of the day “Vagina,” and how to effectively use your tongue for the little man in the canoe.

(What is happening??)

I just…okay, look. It’s no secret here at Cinema Headcheese that I have the humor of a 12-year old boy. So I find this short film FUCKING HILARIOUS. Nearly as funny as the Vampire Hunter one. Tuan Edwards has a lot of fun playing Pedie and it shows, especially when he starts laughing through his lines. If you have a good, irreverent sense of humor and are not easily offended, then Pedie the Clown series is for you!

This is from the Vampire Hunter short but I just needed you to get the idea of who/what Pedie is.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

INDIE FILMS FROM AROUND THE WORLD

Some kind of movie host is presenting the greatest movies in the world that you’ve never seen. Hey, toot your own horn, man. Who else is gonna do it? We’re presented with three killer or mutated or weird ass animal movies and they are, sort of, connected.

Killer Raccoon Fish in 3D (2016)

We begin in Creaming, KY (because of COURSE we do) where a girl is yelling at a bunch of sculpture pieces that she claims got her fired. As she gyrates and sexy dances around/on them (this goes on for some time), a mysterious stranger sneaks up on her, knocks her out, and takes her to some kind of basement laboratory.

Dr. Doctor has (holy shit, it’s Chris Ringler. I know that guy!) kidnapped her and plans to combine her with a racoon and a fish to make, you guessed it, a killer raccoon fish. The creature wreaks havoc all over town but the Mayor refuses to cancel any public celebrations and activities. After he jerks off and takes a massive shit, credits roll.

If you had 3D glasses, this picture would make more sense.

Uh…wut? I honestly didn’t know a lot of what was going on because the audio is absolute shite. It was also the most nonsensical film of everything I’ve watched so far and that’s saying something. While the 3-D effect is not that bad, it’s actually easier to see what’s happening without the 3D glasses (which were included with the DVD – so that’s pretty cool).

Radioactive Skunk (I assume it’s 2016 as well)

The ending of the killer racoon fish movie is copied and pasted into the beginning of this one.

The Kid is speaking to…someone on the phone about going in to rescue his sister from Dr. Doctor (remember the gyrating chick from the previous film?) and if he doesn’t call back, contact Squint, a professional commando three days from retirement. There’s something else about a radioactive skunk but honestly, it doesn’t matter at all.

Naturally, The Kid doesn’t call back. Dr. Doctor has captured him and sprays him with some hallucinogenic liquid. But why though?

I DON’T FUCKING KNOW.

Squint finally shows up for the rescue mission, and a bunch of other commandos do, too. Shenanigans ensue – we assume because some title screens pop up about how the movie studio didn’t like how the big fight sequence turned out so they just explain what went down - and the Doctor escapes, after Squint is tricked into some chamber where he’s Brindleflied into another person.

Da FUQ?

Honestly, I have no idea what happened in this movie. The audio was terrible again so it was hard to hear all the pontificating exposition. Chris Ringler is fun as Dr. Doctor, especially while wearing a cooking pot on his head.

Quick little promo before the next killer animal film shows a conversation between two guys and a muppet about "Attack of the 6-foot Squirrel." My guess is this is some kind of promo…? Anyhoo, we finally get to the last of the killer animal shorts with:

Night of the Werebeaver (2019)

Three people are inside a small shelter playing cards while a couple guys patrol the perimeter. Apparently there’s a werebeaver on the prowl and it’s very dangerous. Also if you eat werebeaver shit (WHO IS DOING THIS??) you’ll get all high or something. So when the werebeaver finally rears its ugly (Halloween mask) head, pretty much only Corporal Half-Sack can fight it. But the creature just flips him off and scampers out into the night.

Uh..wut?

Most of the audio is gods awful; Half-Sack is just scream-improvising his lines; and there’s really no point to any of this.

I got nothing else.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

EXPERIMENTAL TALES (2023)

I reviewed a bunch of shorts in this collection already (listed below). There were in a different collection called Tales of Time but seemed to have just been added into this new set. DOESN’T MATTER.

- 357

- Experiment 7734

- seven/eleven

- The Longest 20 Seconds

- Wet

I already reviewed the first four that you can read HERE and "Wet" was reviewed in Part One of this two part post, which you can read HERE. The two new shorts I watched are:

What is the Nightcrawler? (2023)

The same newscaster from Canado is reporting on the so-called Nightcrawler, a creature that puts victims in a trance and then has its way with them. After his special guest, the janitor, talks on camera, the newscaster quits because his job sucks.

I mean…it all felt improvised. Some stuff was kind of funny; most was not. A lot of words and ideas are thrown around but don’t really work together. It’s like trying to put together a puzzle with pieces from ten different sets.

The Executive

Basically this is some kind of producer looking at a clip from Manila Extract. He thinks the idea for this flick is dumb. He’d rather see a guy who puts on kids shows after he’s gotten out of prison (i.e., Pedie the Clown). That has more substance!

The producer is played by Tuan Edwards who is also Pedie the Clown. Uh, this just felt like filler. But hell, I’m all for more Tuan Edwards!

That wraps up Part 2. Atomic Swan Films brings us some crap, and some funny and less bad crap in all shapes and sizes. Not the best out there in filmland but certainly not the worst. Honestly their films are mostly enjoyable to watch, and at least useful just to have some background noise on while you masturbate and you don’t want your roommates to hear you.

Just keep your eyes and ears open as I'm sure this won't be the last ASF offerings I'll review.

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December 19, 2025

Camp Blood Christmas - Movie Review

June 29, 2025

Let Us In (2022) Movie Review

January 22, 2025

PSYCHO APE MOVIE REVIEW

December 21, 2024

Christmas Capsule Reviews 2024 - Part III

June 7, 2024

Bathtub Shark Attack (2023) Movie Review

February 19, 2024

Atomic Swan Films - A Review of Various Shorts PART 2

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